Myles and Beckett Fowl are twins, but the two boys are wildly different. Beckett is blonde, messy and sulks whenever he has to wear clothes. Myles is impeccably neat, has an IQ of 170 and 3-D prints a fresh suit every day - just like his older brother, Artemis Fowl. A week after their 11th birthday the twins are left in the care of house security system NANNI for a single night. In that time, they befriend a troll on the run from a nefarious nobleman and an interrogating nun, both of whom need the magical creature for their own gain.... 

A long time ago in the future, the secret of time travel became known to all. Everyone seized the opportunity - and the world nearly ended. There will always be idiots who want to change history. And so, the Time Police were formed. An all-powerful, international organisation tasked with keeping the timeline straight. At all costs. Their success is legendary, and the Time Wars are over. But now the Time Police must fight to save a very different future - their own. This is the story of Jane, Luke and Matthew - arguably the worst recruits in Time Police history.... 

The complete BBC Radio collection bringing together two full-cast dramatisations of Douglas Adams' Dirk Gently novels. In Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency Dirk Gently has an unshakable belief in the interconnectedness of all things, but his Holistic Detective Agency mainly succeeds in tracking down missing cats for old ladies. Then Dirk stumbles upon an old friend behaving bizarrely - and he's drawn into a four-billion-year-old mystery that must be solved if the human race is to avoid immediate extinction....

Once I have hair I'll be happy.' At least that's what Irish ex-army sergeant Daniel McEvoy tells himself.As a doorman at a seedy New Jersey casino, dealing with unpleasant customers, a neighbour and a receeding hairline are all part of Dan's daily grind. Then he has a particularly bad day. Not only does his one friend, dodgy doctor Zeb Kronski, mysteriously disappear, but Dan's sometime-girlfriend, casino hostess Connie, is found with a hole in her head.

London is Lydia Crow’s city so when a man is found hanged under Blackfriars Bridge, she takes it personally. Even when it seems as if the Silver Family might be involved, Lydia refuses to back down. The Silver Family, who run the finest law firm in London, have a gift for persuasion. In the 'Bad Old Days' it was said they could make a man jump off a roof by convincing him he could fly. But that's all in the past...isn’t it? 

The borders of Lychford are crumbling. Other realities threaten to seep into the otherwise quiet village, and the resident wise woman is struggling to remain wise. The local magic shop owner and the local priest are having troubles of their own. And a mysterious stranger is on hand to offer a solution to everyone's problems. No cost, no strings (she says).

Peter Grant is facing fatherhood and an uncertain future with equal amounts of panic and enthusiasm. Rather than sit around, he takes a job with émigré Silicon Valley tech genius Terrence Skinner's brand-new London start-up - the Serious Cybernetics Company. Drawn into the orbit of Old Street's famous 'silicon roundabout', Peter must learn how to blend in with people who are both civilians and geekier than he is. Compared to his last job, Peter thinks it should be a doddle. But magic is not finished with Mama Grant's favourite son.

Hot on the heels of best-selling Gangsta Granny comes another hilarious, action-packed and touching novel - the story of a little girl called Zoe. Things are not looking good for Zoe. Her stepmother Sheila is so lazy she gets Zoe to pick her nose for her. The school bully Tina Trotts makes her life a misery - mainly by flobbing on her head. And now the evil Burt from Burt’s Burgers is after her pet rat! And guess what he wants to do with it? The clue is in the title....

Someone has been supplying Class-A illegal human power sources to the goblins. Captain Holly Short of the LEPrecon Unit is sure that her archenemy, 13-year-old Artemis Fowl, is responsible. But is he? Artemis has his own problems to deal with: his father is being held to ransom and only a miracle will save him. Maybe this time a brilliant plan just won’t be enough. Maybe this time Artemis needs help....

The unabridged, downloadable audiobook edition of Artemis Fowl: The Eternity Code is the third book in the unbelievably brilliant Artemis Fowl series by Eoin Colfer. Read by the actor Gerry O'Brien.Artemis Fowl is attempting to go straight. But there's always time for one last job. Artemis Fowl has created the most powerful new supercomputer known to man - using stolen technology from an elite race of underground fairies.

Twelve-year-old villain, Artemis Fowl, is the most ingenious criminal mastermind in history. His bold and daring plan is to hold a leprechaun to ransom. But he’s taking on more than he bargained for when he kidnaps Captain Holly Short of the LEPrecon (Lower Elements Police Reconnaissance Unit). For a start, leprechaun technology is more advanced than our own. Add to that the fact that Holly is a true heroine and that her senior officer Commander Root will stop at nothing to get her back and you’ve got the mother of all sieges brewing!

Mary Jekyll, alone and penniless following her parents' deaths, is curious about the secrets of her father's mysterious past. One clue in particular hints that Edward Hyde, her father's former friend and a murderer, may be nearby, and there is a reward for information leading to his capture...a reward that would solve all of her immediate financial woes. But her hunt leads her to Hyde's daughter, Diana, a feral child left to be raised by nuns.

Is this Armageddon for the Artemis Fowl? Opal Koboi, power-crazed pixie, is plotting to exterminate mankind and become fairy queen. If she succeeds, the spirits of long-dead fairy warriors will rise from the earth, inhabit the nearest available bodies and wreak mass destruction. But what happens if those nearest bodies include crows, or deer, or badgers - or two curious little boys by the names of Myles and Beckett Fowl? Yes, it’s true. Criminal mastermind Artemis Fowl’s four-year-old brothers could be involved in destroying the human race.

James Acaster wakes up heartbroken and alone in New York, his relationship over, a day of disastrous meetings leading him to wonder if comedy is really what he wants to be doing anymore. A constant comfort in James' life has been music, but he's not listened to anything new for a very long time. Idly browsing 'best of the year' lists, it dawns on him that 2016 may have been a grim year for a lot of reasons, but that it seemed to be an iconic year for music. And so begins a life-changing musical odyssey, as James finds himself desperately seeking solace in the music of 2016....

In a realm where one’s magical power determines one’s worth, Lady Everleigh’s lack of obvious ability relegates her to the shadows of the royal court of Bellona, a kingdom steeped in gladiator tradition. Seventeenth in line for the throne, Evie is nothing more than a ceremonial fixture, overlooked and mostly forgotten. But dark forces are at work inside the palace. When her cousin Vasilia, the crown princess, assassinates her mother the queen and takes the throne by force, Evie is also attacked, along with the rest of the royal family.