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F--k Coping Start Healing
- The Anxiety Guy’s Guide To...
- Narrated by: Mike Carnes
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
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Publisher's Summary
Welcome to the beginning of the end of your anxiety.
Together, you and I are headed toward an inner transformation. It begins with an inner awakening followed by a rebirth and then by moving through life with a brand-new pair of lenses. This is a process that holds no timeline for your healing. It’s a journey where the balance between your desire for certainty and faith in uncertainty meet.
I like to call this a flow state. It’s the place where fighting with your current thinking patterns, your rocky past, your physical sensations, and your emotions become a thing of the past. Through F--k Coping, Start Healing, you will find harmony between your conscious mind, your subconscious mind, and your body, and the results will be nothing short of miraculous.
A passionate CBT and NLP master practitioner/life coach, Dennis continues to inspire millions worldwide throughout The Anxiety Guy Podcast on iTunes, his popular blog at theanxietyguy.com, as well as his many social media channels online. His fun loving, gentle, and yet straightforward coaching style has helped many people truly understand that they are more than anxiety.
“Don’t believe everything you feel.” (Dennis Simsek)
What listeners say about F--k Coping Start Healing
Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Leah C.
- 17-09-2020
𝙀𝙨𝙨𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙖𝙡
If you really want to heal, this the book for you! I am so grateful for the deep insights and comprehensive guidance this book contains. I have not finished it yet, but I am really surprised at how powerful a new understanding and direction in thinking can be on your mind and body!! 𝙄 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙜𝙮!!! I'm enjoying getting out and about more and this is no coincidence. 𝙉𝙤 𝙖𝙢𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙨 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙜𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙄 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙮 𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙖 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜!
If you are expecting Dennis to be the narrator because you are used to listening to his voice, don't be disappointed. We prefer to listen to him conversing not reading anyway.
𝙇𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙛𝙞𝙩𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣!
Meanwhile I've got to continue what I've started!
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Sarah
- 13-03-2023
Add this one to your listening list - 4.5 stars
The Anxiety Guy's Guide to F*ck Coping Start Healing explains how, after years of suffering, Dennis Simsek found healing within 3-6 months. As the title suggests, FCSH is not about managing anxiety, but "developing a new you", & in this aim, is quite revolutionary.
The book is aimed at readers suffering panic, social, & generalised anxiety disorder. Chapter 1 outlines Simsek's approach, which he calls "Rapid Intuitive Conditioning" or RIC: "rapid" being a reminder that transformation can happen faster than we might believe, "intuitive" a call to trust in ourselves to bring out the right formula for healing according to our personal needs, & "conditioning" an approach to complete change in one's core beliefs & identity.
Simsek developed RIC to be adaptable, explaining that it "targets anxiety between the conscious, more intellectual mind, and the subconscious, more emotional mind". Or, the "analytical" & "survival" mine. This is a popular idea - that the flight or fight instincts we evolved to cope with physical threats do not serve us in the majority of situations encountered in modern life. These days, Simsek explains, the most important threats that bring on anxiety aren't those that particularly threaten our lives, but our identity - thanks to how we're programmed by family, education, media, & society. Key to Simsek's approach is his observation that a person cannot simply think their way out of severe anxiety, "because at the level of severe anxiety, you're too invested in your supercharged nervous emotions to gather any kind of momentum through thought alone".
Like many books of its kind, FCSH asks readers to reflect on any trauma they may have experienced which could underpin their anxiety. While several chapters deal specifically with what are commonly understood as traumatic events, & parent-child relationships in particular, crucially, Simsek defines trauma as "any event that you perceived as unsafe; when you felt helpless". He explains that any experience seen not from our adult perspective but from the frightened eyes of our "inner child" can be traumatic. Since we interpret sensory data based on how we feel &, importantly, how we perceive our memories, we can become oversensitised to certain input. "Anxiety is due to interpretation," Dennis explains, "not the way you feel, or what happens on the outside".
Despite this focus on trauma, FCSH is not about dwelling on the past or blaming others. As Simsek states, "anxiety is very much not your fault, but it is your responsibility to overcome". His approach is that it's "necessary to talk about our past traumas, but only a little... A balance between talk and action is needed". In fact, Simsek describes RIC as "as much a spiritual path as it is a mental, emotional, and physical one".
Anxiety, in Simsek's view, is not a life sentence, but a bundle of habits, such as believing that one can read minds (& therefore fixating on what others "must" be thinking about us), that our thoughts will predict outcomes (& therefore we "must" worry about things), & that there's only one possible outcome for a given situation (& therefore things "must" turn out for the worst).
Consistent with his podcasts & other publications, Simsek's overall guidance tends to be philosophical rather than "tips & tricks". His "I am" model asks readers to define who they are vs. what they are doing. To stop overvaluing everyone else - & undervaluing themselves. To stop pushing away who we want to be for the sake of others.
Simsek presents his 8 laws of anxiety recovery, a map of how we perceive reality, & a master framework for healing anxiety which relies on how we perceive the past, present & future. In addition, he provides readers with tools to assess where they currently are, like the belief scale. Aside from these broad topics, FCSH also provides concrete, actionable advice for everyday challenges. A huge amount of advice is heaped upon anxiety sufferers, to the extent it can be overwhelming. By contrast, Simsek's recommendations are simple yet powerful. How, for an anxiety sufferers, aiming for just one minute of peace through meditation can be enough. How reframing is a secret weapon. And why sometimes we resist change, & how set backs are actually opportunities for practicing our new-found skills in disguise. Setbacks, Simsek explains, are feedback, not failure.
Most of the book's practical advice is dispensed close to the end in Chapter 20, where Simsek reveals his toolbox for healing. While readers might be eager for such tactics & strategies earlier, I believe the book is carefully organised to guide readers towards the sort of mindset they will need for any of these tools to work. After all, Simsek explains how counterproductive it can be to chant mantras like "I am safe" if you don't truly believe them. As he says, "you can't fake your way into convincing your subconscious mind."
One previous reviewer (of the paperback edition) commented that while they enjoyed the Anxiety Guy's YouTube content, the book may be too long-winded for those suffering anxiety (the same can be said of my review!). Personally, I'd recommend the audiobook for anyone concerned about this - most of the chapters are around the same length as the YouTube/podcast content, & can be listened to one day at a time. Chapter 20 in particular, however, probably warrants repeated listens (& perhaps could have been split into 2+ chapters, given its length & the wealth of information provided).
The audiobook is professionally produced, & the narrator, Mike Cames, is clear and easy to listen to. While it took a little while to get used to hearing Dennis' words in another voice, in some respects, I think it was useful to hear these thoughts read in a new voice, in line with the author's emphasis on novelty & embracing change.
My only real criticism relates to an unfortunate citation in the final chapter, where Simsek explorers, among other topics, the mind-body connection. He shares the staggering statistics that the AMA states that "60 to 80% of all primary care physician visits are related to stress", & the CDC believes "85% of diseases are caused by some type of emotional component". Simsek relates the various alternative treatments he & his mother pursued when she was diagnosed with cancer. Although she opted not to undergo chemotherapy, she did have surgery as recommended by her doctors, having what turned out to be a benign cyst removed. Simsek sensibly warns that while the mind-body connection is powerful, people should follow their doctor's advice wherever possible.
Unfortunately, in addition to the verifiable findings offered at the start of the chapter, Simsek also cites "scientist" Gregg Braden's story of visiting a drug-free hospital in China, where he apparently witnessed a woman's tumour shrink & disappear before his eyes on a screen, simply through the words "the healing is here" & "it is done", which Simsek describes as "the collective mental environments of everyone involved, as well as emotional energy that communicated with the inner intelligence of the patient until the healing showed up". Not only is this story unsubstantiated, but it doesn't add anything to Simsek's book. In fact, it seems to contradict his earlier assertion that taking action is more important than mere talking.
While the mind-body connection is indeed powerful, & mental health plays a great role in physical health (& vice-versa), I find it regrettable that the author included this particular reference, & that he introduced Braden as a "scientist" when Braden's only academic qualification is a bachelor's with honours in structural geology & earth sciences - no more relevant than a layperson in making or assessing health claims. I'm afraid the endorsement of this sort of content does nothing to strengthen Simsek's approach, & for many readers, may unfortunately lead them to be skeptical of the more useful of his material, & miss out on the benefits it could bring. In fact, one of the few negative reviews the paperback edition received cited the inclusion of "woo" as motivating the low rating.
Let me be clear: I am not criticising Simsek's philosophical musings or commentary on spirituality, but rather, the presentation of a person who is unqualified in a particular field as an expert, & the unfortunate impact this is likely to have on uptake of Simsek's own work. I sincerely hope the author will consider releasing an updated edition without this content & perhaps broken into shorter chapters in future, as I think the quality content of this book deserves greater reach.
Overall, I would still recommend FCSH to anyone who has watched or listened to the Anxiety Guy material & found Dennis' message resonated with them - especially if you are happy to be selective in your reading, taking what works for you & leaving what doesn't (which, after all, I understand to be an important part of the RIC philosophy - the Intuition at its core).
While FCSH has a more catchy and general title (and focus), I found The Essential Guide to Health Anxiety by the same author an even more convincing & better paced book - perhaps because it was written later, giving the author more opportunity to develop his thinking & expression. While it may not be as applicable for those not specifically experiencing heath anxiety, I would still recommend it as an accompaniment to FCSH. Simsek's approach blending CBT & NLP techniques, in my view, offers more hope than most conventional books touting these methods, & I believe that the more ideas you can be exposed to, reflect on, & either thoughtfully implement or thoughtfully reject, the better your prospects for a full recovery from anxiety.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 28-10-2020
Incredible
This books is truly life changing. It’s more then overcoming anxiety. It’s the way back to the real you. Thank you Dennis.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- joanne
- 24-10-2020
Best Anxiety book EVER
Highly Recommended. This is the only Anxiety book you need to start healing from Anxiety today. I have read many other Anxiety books but this book just resonates with me. Dennis understands the struggle, from his own personal experience. Have followed Dennis on YouTube for years and he is a great teacher
You are more than Anxiety.
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