A Beautiful Adventure Marriage cover art

A Beautiful Adventure Marriage

By: Tara and Alex Payne
Listen for free

  • Summary

  • Hello friends, and welcome to A Beautiful Adventure Marriage Podcast. We are Alex and Tara Payne and we're so glad you're here. We're here to shine a positive light on marriage through Biblical truths and practical marriage tips and resources. We believe marriage is God's idea. It's a good idea and it can be a beautiful adventure. So let's go!
    2022
    Show More Show Less
Episodes
  • Episode 31- 12 Things to Avoid in Marriage Part 2

    Episode 31- 12 Things to Avoid in Marriage Part 2
    May 14 2024

    Hello friends and welcome to the A Beautiful Adventure Marriage podcast. On our last episode, we gave you 6 out of 12 things that every marriage should avoid to be healthy and happy. We discussed…

    1. Constant Criticism and Belittling

    2. Being Secretive and Lying

    3. Silent Treatment

    4. Holding Grudges

    5. Confiding Too Much in Others

    6. Giving Ultimatums

    These are in no order but they all are equally damaging to a relationship.

    In this episode we are back for part 2. We have 6 more things that every marriage should avoid. So Alex let’s dive in…

    Disrespect and Name Calling

    Conflict is inevitable and arguments will happen in marriage. Although these moments will happen you and your spouse can still maintain a level of composure.

    One way you can show respect is by choosing your words wisely. Name-calling is detrimental to a relationship. It’s a level of disrespect that will slowly and effectively destroy a marriage.

    Unfaithfulness

    Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. Hebrews 13:4

    When you say, “I do”, you are committing solely to be with one person for the rest of your life. Regardless of the uniqueness of every marriage, sleeping with someone else is wrong and will bring nothing but damage to your marriage. God intended marriage to be between one man and one woman. Marriage in itself is a ministry, but only when we honor our vows by remaining faithful to God and each other.

    Putting Children/Others Before Your Spouse

    In Biblical order, our spouse comes before everyone but God. However, there are a lot of people who get this one out of order. So Biblical order is God, Spouse, Children, everything else. This means no one should come before your spouse except God, and that includes children, friends, and family.

    This is not to say that you do not love those people well, it just means they are not your number one priority 100% of the time.

    Using Sex as a Weapon

    Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 1 Corinthians 7:5

    Within a marriage sex is a gift. It was given to us by a good God. Because sex is so important in a marriage it should never be used as a weapon. We should avoid withholding sex from our spouses to punish them or teach them a lesson.

    For the people who use this tactic, thing about this… sex is a gift that God gave us specifically for the marriage relationship. When you use it as a weapon, you are taking God’s gift and using it for evil. Nothing and I meant absolutely NOTHING will come out of manipulating someone like that.

    Never Spending Time Together

    Marriage can be so much fun. You get to do life with your best friend. However, that particular bond cannot form if you and your spouse never spend time together. A packed schedule can be a threat to a marriage. If you have absolutely no free time to spend time with your spouse, your marriage will suffer in the long run.

    Always Avoid Abuse

    Although some of the things mentioned are forms of abuse, we still wanted to take a
    moment and emphasize that all abuse is wrong. Not only should we avoid abuse, it should not be tolerated in a marriage at all.

    There are so many different forms of abuse that it would be impossible to name them all. However, if you find yourself in a position where physical, verbal, or emotional abuse is present please get help. Please do not stay in a dangerous environment. That is not normal, and you do not desire that!

    For sure, marriage can be a beautiful thing, but it won’t be if the things mentioned above or other abuse are happening! It may take some work to change things around, but your marriage is worth it!

    www.abeautifuladventuremarriage.com
    Show More Show Less
    35 mins
  • Episode 30- 12 Things to Avoid in a Marriage Part 1

    Episode 30- 12 Things to Avoid in a Marriage Part 1
    Apr 16 2024
    12 Things to Avoid in Marriage Every marriage is different. Everyone has their own uniqueness that they bring into their marriage that makes it special. We should be thankful for this, how boring would life be if everyone and every marriage looked the same? Being different is a gift; however, there are certain things every marriage should avoid. As the years pass in marriage it’s easy to get passive in certain behaviors. When you are engaged and newly married you are on your best behavior, and there are certain things that you would just never do… fast forward a few years and they might start happening. While little slips here and there may happen, we need to be vigilant about keeping those slips to a minimum for the health of our relationship. Although no one is perfect, there are certain behaviors that should just be avoided at all costs. Constant Criticism and Belittling Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29 Criticism and belittling bring an atmosphere of negativity. Let’s be honest, no one only wants to hear what they do wrong. Another problem with constant criticism and belittling is the person goes from hearing that they are doing something wrong to hearing there is something wrong with them as a person. Criticism and belittling each other will never bring healthy change in a marriage. It will not only destroy the marriage, but it can also destroy the self-worth of the person who is constantly exposed to it. Being Secretive and Lying Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. 1 Peter 2:1 Secrets are dangerous in a marriage. Now, we aren’t talking about secrets around something good like a birthday or surprise. We are talking about intentionally withholding information from your spouse in a deceptive way. The problem with secrets is we usually keep them when we know we are doing something we should not be doing. Secrets can also lead to full-blown lying as well. Secrets and lying can break trust in a marriage quickly, and a marriage without trust is not a marriage that can be sustained for long. Silent Treatment Just like we shouldn’t withhold information in our marriage, we should not quit talking to our spouse for extended periods. So many people use this when they are angry with each other. Although taking a break in an argument can be very beneficial, we always need to come back and find closure. Going for days or even weeks in a marriage without communicating will never bring restoration, it will only widen division in your relationship. If you need a moment, communicate that, but do not practice the silent treatment. 4. Holding Grudges For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. Matthew 6:14-15 In marriage hurts will happen. There are no perfect people, and that is why forgiveness is so very important. When these hurts happen, we cannot hold grudges and constantly bring up the past. Being historical will never bring healing to a relationship. Some hurts are difficult to deal with, if that is the case get whatever help is necessary because grudges are not the answer. Confiding Too Much in Others Having a mentor, someone you can go to for wisdom and guidance is amazing. Everyone and every marriage needs mentors. However, there is a difference between a mentor and anyone who will listen. There is also a difference between going to someone for guidance and going to someone to complain and vent. We should protect our marriages by being selective in who we confide in, especially if that person is of the opposite sex. We should never go to someone to simply complain about our marriage or share the shortcomings of our spouse. If there is a problem, figure it out with your spouse, or go together to a mentor, counselor, or pastor. Giving Ultimatums An ultimatum is a final and uncompromising demand. When a person issues an ultimatum, they are saying, “I do not care what you want or think, you will do this my way or else.” Read that sentence again. Does this sound like an attitude that would create a healthy and happy marriage? Of course not! Marriage is about communication and compromise. It is two people working together as a team and finding ways to do life together in a harmonious way. Ultimatums will never bring harmony to a marriage. It will only bring manipulation and control. So these are the first things that should be avoided at all costs in a marriage. We hope you see why these things can be so destructive and choose not to have them active in your marriage. Yeh join us next time as we give you 6 more things that should be avoided so your marriage can be a beautiful adventure. ...
    Show More Show Less
    31 mins
  • Episode 29- SMART Goals for Your Marriage

    Episode 29- SMART Goals for Your Marriage
    Apr 2 2024
    SMART Goals for Your Marriage

    In our last podcast, we gave you 5 ways to reconstruct your marriage if it was going through a hard season. However, your marriage could be in a really good place, but there are still things you and your spouse want to accomplish. When it comes to reconstructing your marriage or just continuing to make it better, you need to have a plan.

    So join us for this episode where we will teach you how to set SMART goals for your marriage.

    How to Set SMART Goals

    And the Lord answered me, and said, Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it. Habakkuk 2:2

    If you are listening to us right now, my prayer is that you want to invest in your marriage and you want to set some attainable goals. With the information we have for you we believe you can set both short-term and long-term goals that you can achieve and grow your marriage.

    S-Specific

    When you are setting your goals do not make them vague. If you do it will be hard to figure out if you have indeed accomplished them. The more specific you can be the better. That way you will know exactly what you are working toward, and you will know exactly when you achieve it.

    M- Measurable

    By making your goal measurable it will be easier to track. You will be able to see your progress which will keep you moving forward until you achieve it. If you can’t measure your progress, you can become frustrated when it seems nothing is happening. Frustration can lead you into giving up entirely.

    A-Attainable

    Make sure you are working toward a goal that is possible. Now that is not to say that the goal can’t be challenging. Some goals will take a lot of work to accomplish and that is perfectly fine. Great fulfillment will come when you accomplish a goal that took effort. Just be sure that regardless of the challenge that it can be attained. If you set a goal that is impossible, you are just giving the enemy a weapon to use against you.

    R-Relevant and Realistic

    When setting goals, be honest with yourself. You know what you and your spouse are capable of in this season. Set goals that are relevant and realistic for the season that you are in. As the seasons of your life and marriage change, your capacity will change as well, but start where you are and work from there. We all have different starting lines. Find yours and set yourself up for success.

    T- Time-Bound

    Give each goal its own deadline. Some will be short-term goals that can be checked off the list quickly. Others may take months or even years to accomplish. Give each goal a realistic time frame and then work toward that.

    The Most Important Step

    Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established. Proverbs 16:3

    When we take the time to set SMART goals, it will make our lives so much easier. When we have a plan it is always easier to execute it. But let’s not forget the most important step… include the Father. Pray about these goals. Asking the Lord to reveal to you what it is He wants you both to accomplish in your marriage, and also ask Him to help you as you and your spouse go through the whole process.

    The Lord not only has given you goals and dreams to achieve but He wants to be a part of it all. Don’t think you have to do this on your own. He is here and wants to help you and your spouse accomplish great things.

    www.abeautifuladventuremarriage.com
    Show More Show Less
    23 mins
Social Sciences Relationships Christianity Spirituality
Show More Show Less

What listeners say about A Beautiful Adventure Marriage

Average Customer Ratings

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

Audible.com.au reviews

Amazon Reviews
No Reviews are Available
In the spirit of reconciliation, Audible acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.