Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love, with Ashley and Heather.

On today’s episode, we answer the following questions:

• How do I not hate or resent my husband when I grieve the inability to try to have more children because we have a sexless marriage due to the trauma of his addiction?
• Can you speak to sexual anorexia after betrayal? It's been 5 years since my husband and I have had sex. He thinks I should be willing to try, but I recoil every time he touches me. I can barely kiss him. I've been through B&B three times (as a leader twice). He has been through Seven Pillars five times, and has been a leader for 4 or 5 years. I discovered his betrayal in 2013.
• My husband is well on his way to recovery and I am so grateful for all his work, but I’m realizing I need more help myself. Now that he has made me the desires of his sexual pleasure, I find that I am more cautious and suspicious of his sexual advances. I’m always analytical about where his needs are coming from. What should I do?

Listen Now

If you have a question you’d like us to answer on Unfiltered, email us at unfiltered@puredesire.org.

We can’t wait to hear from you!

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Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love, with Ashley and Heather.

On today’s episode, we answer the following questions:

- I’ve felt the harm of purity culture, but I’m confused by the reaction against it—where modesty seems dismissed altogether. I see Christian women dressing in ways that feel extreme, and I wonder if immodesty reflects deeper heart issues. Is there still space to talk about healthy modesty without sounding judgmental?

- I was told having expectations is wrong, but I disagree. I don’t expect perfection—just honesty, fidelity, empathy, and repentance without blame. My husband says I expect too much, but aren’t these just the basics of a healthy marriage? Where’s the line between reasonable expectations and unrealistic standards?

- My husband and I have been in recovery for years. I’m the higher drive spouse, wanting intimacy more often, but I’ve stopped initiating because I feel rejected or like a burden. When he finally is in the mood, I freeze and feel disconnected—even when it’s genuine. Why do I shut down in the moments I actually crave most?

If you have a question you’d like us to answer on Unfiltered, email us at unfiltered@puredesire.org. We can’t wait to hear from you!

The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex

The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex

The Gift of Sex

The Couple’s Guide to Intimacy

Find this and all episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@_UnfilteredPodcast/videos

GET STARTED

Free eBook: 7 Keys To Understanding Betrayal Trauma

Free eBook: 5 Steps to Freedom From Porn

Schedule Your Free 15-Minute Counseling Consultation

Join A Pure Desire Online Group

SOCIALS

Follow us on Facebook

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Follow us on X (Twitter)

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Thanks for listening to Unfiltered: Real Talk about Sex and Love, with Ashley and Heather.

On today’s episode, we answer the following questions:

- I am single right now, but every time I get in the shower I think about when I get married and if my husband will want to take a shower with me. I don't want my husband in the shower. So how would I tell him no without hurting him?

- I'm a follower of Christ. I was sexually abused several times as a child, I struggled with same-sex attraction most of my life, and I am still single. How do I engage my sexual desires at this stage in a healthy way, knowing that I want to honor God above all?

- I am 47 years old and single. I’m having a lot of anxiety about the idea of having sex when I’m married. I want to be married, but I’m afraid sex will hurt, I won’t know how to act, and I don’t even want to have an orgasm. How do I handle all of these thoughts and fears?

If you have a question you’d like us to answer on Unfiltered, email us at unfiltered@puredesire.org. We can’t wait to hear from you

The Wounded Heart

Find this and all episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@_UnfilteredPodcast/videos

GET STARTED

Free eBook: 7 Keys To Understanding Betrayal Trauma

Free eBook: 5 Steps to Freedom From Porn

Schedule Your Free 15-Minute Counseling Consultation

Join A Pure Desire Online Group

SOCIALS

Follow us on Facebook

Follow us on Instagram

Follow us on X (Twitter)

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.