Episodes

  • Psychedelics, Implants, and the Manchurian Candidate
    Feb 12 2026

    The mics are hot and the takes are hotter. This week, the Dicks tackle Trump calling an Olympian a "loser," the ethics of $9,000 medical trials (Jesse volunteers his body for science… and cash), and a deep dive into cognitive decline that actually ends on a hopeful note. Plus: Uber's broken business model, the Mandela Effect vs. government gaslighting, and why Bondi is a real American c*nt. It's loud, it's loose, and it's exactly what you need.

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    1 hr and 34 mins
  • AI John Candy & ICE Gulags
    Feb 5 2026

    Grab a water (or something stronger) and pull up a stool. In this episode, the Dicks navigate a labyrinth of topics: Should John Candy be digitally resurrected for the Spaceballs sequel? How did two famous announcers not know they were brothers? And what’s the constitutional limit on federal ice agents? Stops are made for Aaron Lewis's rants, the perils of quitting vices, and the universal language of road signs. No agenda, just the flow of a great bar conversation.

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    1 hr and 19 mins
  • Begats, Beards, and Bad Covers
    Jan 29 2026

    The podcast where the intro is an outtake and the plot is whatever sticks to the wall. This episode’s journey includes: getting stuck in a hypothetical time loop, skipping the "begat" chapters of the Bible, designing the perfect Gremlins sock-puppet knockoff, and planning a side project for "old, scrotchety" rock covers ("Get Off My Lawn"). It's a beautifully unplanned mess—like a great night at the bar should be.

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    1 hr and 19 mins
  • Hemorrhoids, Hoosiers, & G.I. Joes
    Jan 22 2026

    The crew opens with the finer points of personal hygiene before Jesse recounts his freezing, high-as-a-kite trip to Georgia, complete with antique posters warning of "crime, suicide, and prostitution." The conversation takes a sharp turn into the ethics of immigration policy (with some googled stats), before a warm, nostalgic crash landing into the greatest toys of the 80s—from Ewok Villages to Thundercats. It's a rollercoaster from ass-scratching to action figures.

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    1 hr and 7 mins
  • The 32-Year-Old Adolescent & The Secret Data Center
    Jan 15 2026

    As Jesse preps for a freezing trip to Georgia (and a legendary D&D drink menu), the conversation spirals into the nature of reality itself. Is there a secret government data center under a certain Florida ballroom? Are we living in a simulation post-2012? And why does science now say your brain isn't an adult until you're 32? All this, plus a passionate rant on remote work, resource hoarding, and whether Wile E. Coyote cartoons were ever in black and white.


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    1 hr and 24 mins
  • Pittsburgh Cheesesteaks & Beard-Growing Wisdom
    Jan 8 2026

    The gang tackles the first "Short Attention Span Theater" episode of 2026 by trying to understand Three Kings Day, defending disc golf as "real golf," and offering unsolicited advice on growing a beard (and dealing with psoriasis). A visit from "Pittsburgh Bob" sparks a debate on regional sandwiches, while the conversation meanders through international politics, Olympic preferences, and the most aerodynamic head shapes for imaginary winter swimming events. It's a masterclass in conversational chaos.

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    1 hr and 20 mins
  • A One-Way Ticket & The Ball Drop
    Jan 1 2026

    As the clock ticks down on 2025, the conversation takes an unexpected turn when a guest reveals his estranged father—absent for over 30 years—has just shown up with a one-way ticket and no place to stay. While prepping picklebacks and debating the physics of teabagging, the crew steps back to offer raw, unfiltered advice on family, forgiveness, and the questions you may never get to ask. All this, plus a urgent meteorological theory on why Florida might be safe from hurricanes. Ring in 2026 with the most chaotic and heartfelt countdown you'll hear.

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    54 mins
  • Stabby Stabby, Weed Shots, and Ghosting
    Dec 18 2025

    What do a celebrity murder case, 100-day sobriety bets, ceramic car coatings, and the ethics of ghosting have in common? Absolutely nothing—and that’s exactly the point. Grab a seat (and maybe a weed soda) as the guys jump from true crime to dating apps, from disc golf fails to 90s music deep cuts, in a conversation that proves the best talks happen when there’s no plan at all. No topic is safe, and no segue is required.

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    1 hr and 54 mins