Episodes

  • Pittsburgh Cheesesteaks & Beard-Growing Wisdom
    Jan 8 2026

    The gang tackles the first "Short Attention Span Theater" episode of 2026 by trying to understand Three Kings Day, defending disc golf as "real golf," and offering unsolicited advice on growing a beard (and dealing with psoriasis). A visit from "Pittsburgh Bob" sparks a debate on regional sandwiches, while the conversation meanders through international politics, Olympic preferences, and the most aerodynamic head shapes for imaginary winter swimming events. It's a masterclass in conversational chaos.

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    1 hr and 20 mins
  • A One-Way Ticket & The Ball Drop
    Jan 1 2026

    As the clock ticks down on 2025, the conversation takes an unexpected turn when a guest reveals his estranged father—absent for over 30 years—has just shown up with a one-way ticket and no place to stay. While prepping picklebacks and debating the physics of teabagging, the crew steps back to offer raw, unfiltered advice on family, forgiveness, and the questions you may never get to ask. All this, plus a urgent meteorological theory on why Florida might be safe from hurricanes. Ring in 2026 with the most chaotic and heartfelt countdown you'll hear.

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    54 mins
  • Stabby Stabby, Weed Shots, and Ghosting
    Dec 18 2025

    What do a celebrity murder case, 100-day sobriety bets, ceramic car coatings, and the ethics of ghosting have in common? Absolutely nothing—and that’s exactly the point. Grab a seat (and maybe a weed soda) as the guys jump from true crime to dating apps, from disc golf fails to 90s music deep cuts, in a conversation that proves the best talks happen when there’s no plan at all. No topic is safe, and no segue is required.

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    1 hr and 54 mins
  • Vibrators for Pussies: Two Dicks in a Bar
    Dec 11 2025

    Our mission is simple: use ridiculous, NSFW charity events to raise money for cat rescues. Our podcast is everything else. Co-hosts and brewery reps Dan and Mike are the masterminds behind the "Vibrator Roadshow," a traveling spectacle of battery-powered madness. Each week, they drag the microphone to a different bar to recap the races, plan the next event, and get spectacularly sidetracked with the locals. It's a mix of grassroots activism, South Florida nightlife, and the kind of meandering, hilarious bar talk that only happens after a few rounds. Tune in for the cause, stay for the chaos.

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    53 mins
  • Johnny Depp, Disc Golf, and Demonized Nipples
    Dec 4 2025

    The conversation bounces like a pinball in a dive bar. One minute we're hearing a "totally true" story about partying with Johnny Depp until sunrise, the next we're analyzing the psychological torture of disc golf scoring apps. In between, the Dicks solve the 1970s porn distribution network, argue about the legality of nudity (free the nip!), and try to remember if there was ever a good reason to wear a drug rug in South Florida. It's a chaotic, cozy hang for the holidays.

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    2 hrs
  • Our Google-r Got Gaslit (A Thanksgiving Miracle)
    Nov 27 2025

    Our fact-checker bailed, so we're just making things up now. We explore the real first Thanksgiving (it was Lincoln, dibs), why cake is a chemical lie and pie is a fruity fraud, and how to properly hit on your bartender using only a cherry and a hair flip. It's a holiday episode so chaotic, we're surprised the pilgrims didn't just turn the Mayflower around.

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    1 hr and 4 mins
  • Putt League, Propaganda, and Moist Panties
    Nov 20 2025

    Strap in for a wild ride as the conversation bounces from the competitive world of DIY disc golf putting to the dark corners of political hypocrisy. The crew dissects Charlie Kirk quotes, South Park's latest takedowns, and the never-ending Epstein saga. But the real meat of the episode is a passionate, absurd argument about the words "moist" vs. "damp" and their application to... well, everything, especially cake and underwear. It's insightful, idiotic, and everything you didn't know you needed.

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    1 hr and 33 mins
  • The Nephew, The Nazi, and The Nicotine Pouches
    Nov 13 2025

    The conversation is as all over the place as a drunkard's stroll. This week, the Dicks dive into a family controversy: was a nephew's school suspension for an edgy doodle justified or total bullshit? The debate quickly spirals into a chaos-fueled session featuring experimental nicotine pouches found outside the bar, a plan for a disc golf trip to the Keys, and a heated rundown of everything from Kevin Smith's filmography to the latest Epstein brother revelations. Strap in for a lesson in low-stakes degeneracy.

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    1 hr and 27 mins