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The Relationship Podcast - There has to be an I before We!

The Relationship Podcast - There has to be an I before We!

By: Elliot Fifi Lottie
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About this listen

Welcome to The Paradox of Change, where three experienced therapists guide you through the essential truth:

I B4We - You have to have a relationship with yourself before you can have a relationship with others!

We believe in understanding your needs, boundaries, and capacity for connection - because the most important relationship you'll ever have is the one with yourself.

Meet Your Guides:
Elliot Burgess - Individual therapist specializing in men's mental health and the foundational "I" work that transforms all relationships

Lottie Passell-Syms - Sex and intimacy specialist dedicated to couples therapy, helping partners navigate the "We" journey through deeper connection and authentic communication and better sex.

Fi Sclif - Individual therapy and growth coaching focusing on mindset, money, and marketing

What You'll Discover:
•⁠ ⁠How self-discovery leads to relationship mastery
•⁠ ⁠Lottie's proven couples therapy techniques for rebuilding intimacy and trust
•⁠ ⁠Practical tools for infidelity recovery, trauma healing, and authentic communication
•⁠ ⁠Insights into masculinity, femininity, and identity development
•⁠ ⁠Strategies for navigating divorce, dating after trauma, and co-parenting
•⁠ ⁠Real conversations about narcissistic abuse recovery and neurodiversity in relationships

Our Philosophy:
Inspired by Carl Rogers' wisdom: "When a client accepts themselves as they are, the curious paradox is that they then change." Whether you're working on yourself individually or as a couple, transformation starts within - heal your relationship with yourself, and watch every other relationship in your life flourish.

Content You Can Expect:
•⁠ ⁠Deep-dive conversations with mental health experts
•⁠ ⁠Individual growth episodes ("The I Series") with Elliot, Fi & Lottie
•⁠ ⁠Couples-focused content ("The We Series") with Lottie's expertise
•⁠ ⁠"I B4We Deep Dives" - All three tackling complex topics together
•⁠ ⁠Real stories of resilience and recovery
•⁠ ⁠Practical tools you can use immediately

Whether you're single and working on yourself, in a relationship needing guidance, or navigating life transitions, we're here as your collaborative guides, not distant experts, but fellow travelers who've walked these paths.

New episodes every two weeks “|” 26+ episodes available now!

Subscribe and join our community of people choosing accountability and growth!



https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange

© 2025 The Relationship Podcast - There has to be an I before We!
Personal Development Personal Success
Episodes
  • Labiaplasty - When the pursuit of perfection becomes dangerous!
    Jun 10 2025

    Labiaplasty & Ozempic : Understanding the Surge in Popularity... Our resident therapist and coach, Fi, interviews Ceira Robinson, from London's prestigious Mayfair cosmetic surgery scene. Might Like this? https://youtu.be/pK6vVHyeWcs?si=hEY6cYBTGeo4VWd6

    This eye-opening conversation reveals the alarming surge in cosmetic procedures, especially labiaplasty among young women, and exposes how social media pressures are driving dangerous beauty standards. The discussion also touches on emerging trends like Ozempic dietary injections and their intersection with body image issues.

    Key Topics Covered:
    • Labiaplasty surgery trends and consultation surges • NHS policies denying necessary aesthetic procedures • Body dysmorphia cycles in cosmetic surgery patients • Social media's toxic impact on women's body image • Risks of cosmetic surgery abroad vs. UK procedures • Ozempic and dietary injection trends affecting body standards • The emotional journey of cosmetic surgery recovery • Making informed choices about aesthetic procedures • Mental health implications of beauty standard pressures
    Essential viewing for anyone considering cosmetic surgery, struggling with body dysmorphia, or concerned about the industry's impact on women's mental health and self-acceptance.

    #CosmeticSurgery #Labiaplasty #BodyDysmorphia #MentalHealth #WomensHealth #SocialMediaImpact #BodyImage #NHS #AestheticProcedures #BeautyStandards #Ozempic #DietaryInjections #FiSclif #CeiraRobinson #TheParadoxOfChange"

    Chapters
    00:00
    The Surge in Cosmetic Procedures
    03:04
    Kira's Journey into Aesthetics
    06:12
    Understanding Cosmetic Surgeries
    08:57
    The Impact of NHS Policies on Surgery Access
    11:59
    Labiaplasty: A Growing Trend
    15:13
    The Cycle of Body Dysmorphia
    17:58
    Social Media's Role in Body Image
    20:56
    Navigating Patient Insecurities
    24:00
    The Personal Side of Cosmetic Surgery
    27:01
    The Balance Between Surgery and Self-Acceptance
    31:53
    Understanding Surgical Procedures and Recovery
    36:45
    The Emotional Journey of Cosmetic Surgery
    39:35
    The Impact of Social Media on Body Image
    41:19
    The Risks of Cosmetic Surgery
    51:20
    Navigating the World of Cosmetic Surgery Abroad
    58:43

    How to find us: https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange

    Show More Show Less
    1 hr
  • Anorexia Survivor and Therapist Explains Signs and Help
    May 26 2025

    How do we Understanding the Emotional Roots of Eating Disorders? You might like our other episode Infidelity https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gh-qO5lQg5U&t=1618s

    Elliot and Lauren explore how these disorders manifest differently in athletes compared to the general public, the impact of family dynamics, and the emotional struggles that often accompany these conditions.

    We highlights the importance of recognising the human behind the athlete and the need for healthy boundaries within family relationships. This conversation delves into the complexities of anorexia and eating disorders, exploring the clinical definitions, the psychological struggles faced by individuals, and the need for compassionate care in treatment. Lauren shares personal experiences, highlighting the impact of societal pressures, childhood trauma, and the often misunderstood nature of eating disorders.

    #EatingDisorderRecovery #HealingFromWithin #mentalhealth
    #EatingDisorderRecovery #AnorexiaAwareness #MentalHealthMatters #RecoveryJourney #HealingFromWithin #RiseAbovePodcast #BodyImageStruggles #YouAreNotAlone #RecoveryIsPossible #SelfLoveJourney #theparadoxofchange #lottiepassell-syms

    Connect with Lauren Vickery:
    Website: https://therapytribe.co.uk/

    Follow us https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange
    Website: https://theparadoxofchange.buzzsprout.com
    Instagram: @theparadoxofchange
    Twitter/X: @ParadoxofChange

    #AnorexiaRecovery #EatingDisorderAwareness #WarningSignsOfAnorexia #MentalHealthPodcast

    Chapters
    00:00 Understanding Eating Disorders: Warning Signs and Dynamics
    06:00 Mental Health in Professional Sports: The Human Behind the Athlete
    09:03 The Impact of Family Dynamics on Eating Disorders
    11:54 Exploring the Types of Eating Disorders
    15:00 The Role of Emotions in Eating Disorders
    20:17 The Impact of Weight and BMI on Diagnosis
    24:24 The Role of Control in Eating Disorders
    29:09 The Need for Compassionate Care in Treatment
    33:12 Hitting Rock Bottom: The Turning Point in Recovery
    35:17 Understanding Bingeing and Purging Behaviors
    36:29 Health Implications of Eating Disorders
    37:07 Exploring Different Types of Eating Disorders
    38:12 The Identity Crisis in Eating Disorders
    39:03 The Role of Social Media in Body Image Issues
    40:32 The Relationship Between Mental Health and Body Image
    41:53 The Male Perspective on Eating Disorders
    43:45 The Impact of Childhood Trauma on Eating Disorders
    45:49 The Process of Writing a Healing Book
    48:23 Reparenting the Inner Child
    50:11 Recognising Signs of Eating Disorders in Children


    How to find us: https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange

    Show More Show Less
    54 mins
  • Communication and Dating and what to learn
    May 5 2025

    Expert Advice On Intimacy, Sex & Relationships. We discuss everything from dating, to love bombing vs limerence to conscious uncoupling. You may like 'Do Happy People Cheat?': https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gh-qO5lQg5U

    A conversation with sex and intimacy specialist Lottie Passell-Syms, hosted by mental health podcast creators James Penny and Sam Bell:

    Sam and James our the brains behind "Flex Your Feelings" and this episode reveals hidden truths about modern dating advice and relationship healing in 2025.

    This therapist and coach workshop-style conversation combines professional insights with playful, actionable wisdom for relationship maintenance.

    Flex Your Feelings
    A mental health and wellness podcast hosted by James Penny, an 'almost sane' therapist specialising in child mental health, and Sam Bell, a 'former, all-round insecure idiot' on his own entrepreneurial journey. We take deep dives into important subjects while staying irreverently surface level, ensuring to connect with your inner child along the way. Our show embraces acceptance of others regardless of sexual orientation, focusing on seeking support and personal transformation.

    In this episode, we welcome intimacy and relationship specialist Lottie Passell-Syms. We discuss the importance of communication in relationships, the changing landscape of dating, and the need for empathy and connection. Lottie shares insights from her twenty years of experience in the field, emphasizing the significance of understanding each other's needs and expectations. This episode provides valuable insights into fostering healthier relationships and understanding individual needs.Chapters

    Pull up a chair, settle in, and 'flex your feelings'.
    https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/flex-your-feelings/id1738814183

    CHAPTERS:
    00:00 Introduction
    00:53 Understanding Intimacy
    03:09 Modern Dating Landscape
    05:58 Communication Essentials
    11:49 Expectations & Needs
    18:11 Empathy & Connection
    24:01 Power Dynamics
    35:22 Generational Perspectives
    43:33 Childhood Scripts
    49:11 Sexual Communication
    55:12 Anticipation & Play
    1:01:32 Breaking Taboos
    1:05:53 Limerence vs Love
    1:17:20 Conscious Uncoupling
    1:23:22 Relationship Maintenance
    1:29:00 Healing After Breakups

    **************

    🔍 KEY INSIGHTS:
    - Why modern relationships need more than just attraction
    - How to maintain intimacy in long-term partnerships
    - Breaking free from childhood relationship patterns
    - The truth about love bombing vs. limerence
    - Practical tools for better communication

    🎯 CONNECT WITH US:
    Website: https://theparadoxofchange.buzzsprout.com
    Instagram: @theparadoxofchange
    Twitter: @ParadoxofChange

    📧 WORK WITH LOTTIE:
    Website: lottie4salesims.com
    Location: Otterbourne, Hampshire

    #RelationshipAdvice #IntimacyTips #CouplesTherapy #ModernDating #MentalHealth #SexualWellness #RelationshipGoals #PersonalGrowth #FlexYourFeelings #ParadoxOfChange

    https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange

    How to find us: https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange

    Show More Show Less
    1 hr and 36 mins

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