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-🎙️ Today on The Effin' CrunchCrew...
"Burp a Fart & Colostomy Pimps??!"

Yeah... you read that right. Somebody said “Burp a fart” and things went downhill from there.
Then we deep-dive into the wild world of pimping out a colostomy hole—yup, folks out here turning medical necessities into OnlyFans side hustles.

And just when you thought it couldn’t get weirder...
We ask the real damn questions:
Can’t you just die and get on with it?
What’s the actual point of Purgatory—a layover for souls with too many unpaid parking tickets?

It’s another chaotic ride through the Effin’ Mumble Jumble—where logic dies, farts testify, and Spook probably offends at least three religions.

Grab your sage and a barf bag—this one’s unholy.
Let’s get Effin' weird.

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-🎙️ Today on The Effin’ CrunchCrew
“To Pee or Not to Pee… That Is the Disclaimer?”

Y’all… it got weird. Real weird.

The age-old debate: is it midgets or little people—and why does Pan Blanco keep looking guilty like we’re talking about his short ass?

Special guest alert: filling in for Pinkie is none other than Spook’s sister, Barbara Jean—aka BJ (yes, that’s her real nickname and yes, we made it inappropriate immediately). She's Loca Lisa’s cousin, so you know the family tea is piping hot.

Also:
🌀 The Wizard of Oz? A lie.
🥋 The Karate Kid? Manipulative nonsense.
👀 Is there such a thing as a fear of little people or are we just horrible humans?
🥴 And what the hell is “BJ’s Revenge”? (Hint: it involves tequila, glitter, and a restraining order.)

All this and a whole damn mess of Effin’ Mumble Jumble.
You’ve been warned. Again.

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-🎙️ Today on The Effin’ CrunchCrew…

Ever been cheated on? Well, buckle up — because one of our own CrunchCrew ladies caught her new “Mr. Right” rockin’ a wedding ring and a newborn… and didn’t even know it. Shoutout to the savage Facebook group that blew up his double life like a firework on the 4th.

Then Spook takes us back to when he and another dude accidentally teamed up to bust his live-in girl playing both of them — and yes, her clothes were neatly packed and waiting on the porch. Bye boo 👋

Plus… Loca Lisa confesses something about handcuffs (again), and we dive into an AITA from a woman asking if she’s wrong for telling her grown-ass man to WIPE. HIS. ASS. 🤦‍♀️🧻

All this and a whole bunch of that sweet, unfiltered, unpredictable Effin’ Mumble Jumble!