Full episodes and much more at Patreon.com/slopquest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! Ryan destroys his body skiing while Andy destroys his body with sword practice. There’s a little Epstein talk while a drone hovers outside the window and Ryan fantasizes about the government bursting into his apartment to attack him. Ryan does a “deep dive” on microchips and concludes they are all fake. This enrages Andy who insists that the philosophy of “I don’t understand something so it’s fake” is not a valid scientific point of view. Andy thinks Ryan’s solo ski trios are Dark Aging his brain. Then Andy finally eats sushi again and Ryan thinks he has worms. Then Ryan fantasizes about Andy going to Norway and being dressed up as a little boy. Then Ryan wants Andy to come to his stand up show so he can do crowd work with him. Andy threatens to sneak a bullhorn into his comedy show and heckle him. Then they talk about how to survive a post nut bj. Ryan gets his gas card declined and thinks he uncovered a vast conspiracy. Then Andy finds some good AIO Reddit threads where people tell a woman to divorce her husband because he didn’t like a character on a reality housewives show.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! Ryan talks about how the real small businessmen are drug dealers. Then Andy talks about the Alkaline water scam and scares himself into backtracking everything. Andy goes tubing in Big Bear and claims it’s even better than skiing but SOMEBODY disagrees. Andy and Ryan try to rehabilitate the cigarette industry. Ryan floats the idea of running for president based solely on revitalizing the American fireworks industry. Andy finds a subreddit where idiots are posting mall katanas and asking his valuable they are. Then Ryan accuses Andy of having “treatment resistant swordplay”. Andy runs out of people to talk about swords with and resorts to keeping a diary of his swordplay gainz. This infuriates O’Neill. Then O’Neill gets roasted by a listener in one of the funniest ways possible. O’Neill insists he is a very supportive friend and is very motivated to build Andy up. Then Andy has to negotiate taking a shit at O’Neill’s apartment. Then Andy cajoles O’Neill into going on Comics Unleashed and doing his 5’9 bit.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! There’s a little Tina Turner talk at the start of the show. Ryan has a series of injuries when his luck runs out. Andy has a 14 hour delay on a flight. Ryan has his mind blown when he finds out lots of Bible Belt Christians don’t consider Catholics Christian. Then Andy attends a sword fighting class behind a CVS. Andy hides most of Reddit from himself. Then Andy recalls a product for getting lap dances that are just rubber underwear with lube in them. Ryan can’t believe that sexual surrogates are real. Ryan tries to figure out why Airforce Amy was a popular sex worker. Then the boys talk about Bill Gates a bit. Then Andy finds out how many dudes in their thirties have to be on viagra. O’Neill works out at an elementary school playground in Texas.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! Andy gets some puffy pants for Christmas called Pluderhosen and wears them to the podcast. O’Neill then takes issues with Andy’s HEMA training and a classic argument commences. Andy is losing weight with sword fighting but Ryan is reluctant to celebrate it. O’Neill then says he could defeat Andy with a move he calls “the helicopter”. Then Andy knocks over half a gallon of water while dancing around and it gets all over the equipment.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! This week Comedy Store veteran and hilarious good buddy, Mike Black is finally in the O’Neill Rent Controlled Studios. The talk about the Jake Paul fight and pitch a new boxing show where half the fighters don’t even want to be there. The boys pitch a new advertising angle for Pinesol. Then Ryan reveals the origins of Cornhole and gets roasted by Mike and Andrew for his choice in comedy material. Ryan and Andrew recount Andy’s unprofessional bank behavior to Mike who defends him. O’Neill makes a classic mistake where he confuses gorillas and pandas. Then Andy gets confused about pandas as well and they debate creating American pandas.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! There’s some late Epstein file talk. O’Neill talks about he’d be tricked into showing up on the Epstein files. He then floats the idea of having a professional photographer hiding to take embarrassing photos. They talk a little about Ellis quitting comedy and O’Neill’s mind is blown. Then they get into a little motivational talk where Andy crowns Ryan “King of Tomfoolery”. Andy tries Ryan’s garlic technique and has Diarrhea. Then Andy pulls the fake text prank on his cousin by marriage which infuriates O’Neill because he doesn’t believe in cousins by marriage. There’s some weight loss by basketball talk. The boys talk about Andy getting HEMA sword tattoo. Andy talks about how he tries to keep lines of communication open with friends and family and O’Neill hates the idea. There’s more tomfoolery about this from O’Neill and Andy begs him to break new ground. Then O’Neill humble brags about how good he is with communicating even if he never talks to people. Then the boys talk about how wives set their husbands up on play dates. O’Neill expresses his desire to not have any friends. Andy finds a Christian comedian lady who KILLS in front of the crowd and O’Neill loses it. Andy meets a woman who describes herself as having been “slutty” but she waited for marriage to have sex? The boys then reminisce about the loss of the “erotic thriller” of the 90’s.

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Andy finds out about the new brain rot gen z pinsol commercials. Andy is back in full form according to O’Neill. Then O’Neill hits on a hot audience member in front of her boyfriend and the crowd loves it. Andy finds an old Napster audio file about grey eyes and torments O’Neill with it. Andy daydreams about being good at sword fighting during a match and gets cranked in the head. Then they discuss putting guys who waste their money on Only Fans in group homes. Andy and O’Neill talk about people who make all their money taping their own farts and how crazy the new economy is. The boys talk about how much plastic we’ve all eaten. Andy gets surrounded by fake AI movie trailers. Then they write a pitch for Forest Gump 2 where the plot is they dig up Jenny’s body so they can reanimate it for one last bang. Then they dig into the hilariously racist past of White Christmas. Andy tells O’Neill about the Japanese “Paris Syndrome” and O’Neill goes nuts.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! This week they celebrate the fact that kids still associate Taco Bell with Diarrhea. Then a fog filled with ammonia settles over O’Neill’s neighborhood and conspiracy theories abound. Then Andy has a disgusting sex dream about a bedazzled vagina. Then O’Neill accuses Andy of getting all his facts from billboards. Then he floats the idea of winning the lottery and buying Andy a house that’s so expensive that Andy goes broke from property taxes. Andy gets prescribed an antibiotic that tears your tendons. Then they delve into China’s strange stance on ghosts and Andy forces O’Neill to become an audio philosopher.