If you've ever left a conversation thinking, well, that went sideways faster than I expected, this episode is for you.

My guest Jen Mueller has spent years in sports broadcasting. On live TV, in locker rooms full of egos with just seconds to nail the interview. One misstep and the whole thing blows up.

Her first NFL locker room? The Dallas Cowboys in the late 90s. They yelled in her face, made it clear she wasn't welcome and she had to decide every single day if showing up was worth it.

I bet most of you, at some point in time have felt something similar, whether in the parking lot outside your office, getting ready to start the Zoom meeting or growing into a new, more prominent role at work.

Hell, maybe even when it’s your turn to lead the discussion at Book Club.

So what does confidence look like when plans change mid-sentence and you have to get the job done anyway? Jen shares an approach is precise out of necessity because in broadcasting, conversations are measured in seconds not minutes.

Clarity isn't just helpful, it's an act of respect. And that precision translates directly to business: how you set up your team, how you give feedback that actually lands and how you stop saying "great job" like it actually means something.

You really need to listen in yourself, but I will tell you one bit that stuck with me and that’s when Jen talks about athletes saying, "I'm just a football player—what do I have to say?" and how she reassures them that's exactly what she wants them to talk about.

That reminder—that you already have the answers—hits just as hard in a conference room as it does on camera.

What else we get into:

• The strategy she uses to prep athletes (and managers) so they walk into conversations ready to win
• How to give feedback that actually lands instead of handing out false praise
• Why "great job" is lazy—and what words to use instead
• How to practice intentionality in low-stakes moments so you're ready when it counts
• What confident leadership looks like when your nervous system is screaming

After 25 years in locker rooms, Jen Mueller knows what it takes to show up, speak up, and lead with confidence. As an Emmy Award–winning producer and veteran sports broadcaster, Jen brings a front-row perspective on effective communication—having spent nearly two decades on the Seattle Mariners broadcast team and entering her 17th season as the Seahawks sideline reporter. Known for her humor, energy, and practical insights, Jen delivers strategies that help professionals build influence, tackle tough conversations, and lead with clarity. Learn more about and connect with Jen at talksportytome.com.

You know what we don’t talk enough about? Nasty feedback.

Not constructive feedback. Not “well-meaning suggestions.” I mean the kind that lands sideways, feels personal and makes your stomach drop before your brain can catch up. The kind that instantly puts you on the defense, even if a tiny part of you wonders whether there’s something in there worth paying attention to.

This episode came out of years of being on stages, publishing work, putting ideas into the world and inevitably getting feedback that stings. No matter how much praise surrounds it, a sharp comment still finds a way to linger. I wanted to talk honestly about that moment: the internal scramble between wanting to dismiss it completely and secretly replaying it later, wondering if it says something uncomfortable about you.

What I explore here isn’t about becoming thicker-skinned or pretending criticism doesn’t matter. It’s about what confidence actually looks like after the feedback hits. The pause. The emotional surge. And how quickly confidence can wobble if we don’t know how to separate who we are from what someone just said about our work, our presence or our performance.

There’s also a quieter question underneath all of this: what responsibility do we have once the feedback is in our hands?

This episode is an invitation to rethink how you engage with criticism that feels unfair, clumsy or poorly delivered and how to stay grounded enough to decide what, if anything, deserves your energy.

Because confident people aren’t immune to feedback—they’re just better at not letting it run the show.

If you’ve been in my orbit for a while, you know I’m picky about gratitude. Most of what’s out there feels fluffy, performative or totally disconnected from how confidence actually works in the real world. So when I say this conversation stopped me in my tracks, I mean it.

My guest is author, speaker, and creator of the GRASP method for confident leadership, Tara LaFon Gooch—and she didn’t come to this work from some polished, camera-ready place. She came to it terrified of visibility, of speaking of being seen at all. What drew me to her isn’t just that she teaches gratitude, but how she talks about it: not as a bypass or denial, but as a deliberate, responsibility-heavy practice that reshapes how we see ourselves.

And yes, we challenge each other a bit in this conversation—which only makes it better.

We get into the kind of gratitude nobody posts on Instagram. Gratitude for past versions of yourself you’re not proud of. Gratitude for moments that bruised your ego, cracked your confidence or left you questioning your worth. Not because those moments were “good,” but because pretending they didn’t shape you keeps you stuck and confidence doesn’t come from erasing your past—it comes from owning it without shame.

There’s also some real neuro-nerd satisfaction here. We talk about how the brain actually changes when gratitude is practiced the right way—not as affirmations you don’t believe, but as repetition that creates new neural paths. Tara shares a metaphor that stayed with me long after we recorded and genuinely shifted how I think about mental habits, resilience, and self-trust.

And maybe my favorite part of this episode: the move from gratitude to responsibility. Because at its heart, confidence is deciding who you are going to be next and acting like that person on purpose. Not overnight. Not perfectly. But consciously.

This Is Why You’ll Want to Listen

• A radically different take on gratitude that actually strengthens confidence instead of numbing reality
• Why being grateful for your past mistakes can be more powerful than forgiving yourself for them
• How confidence grows when you stop fighting your story and start integrating it
• A neuroscience-backed way to think about mindset shifts that doesn’t rely on fake positivity
• The subtle but critical link between responsibility, self-leadership, and real confidence

Tara LaFon Gooch is an award-winning Leadership Speaker, TEDx Speaker, and 2X Best-Selling Author specializing in the transformative power of confidence. Learn more about Tara and the GRASP method at taralafongooch.com.