Episodes

  • 315: Montel, I'm Mad At You

    315: Montel, I'm Mad At You
    Aug 28 2025
    Don’t waste your bangs, escape rooms are fun, always shop with a list and cries without tears are a tell. Did we love a fraud? Men need to step it up, kids need grit and Crystal is losing her mind.

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    1 hr and 43 mins
  • 314: MARK, Get In Here

    314: MARK, Get In Here
    Aug 22 2025
    Peez started kindergarten, Crystal had a relaxing birthday, perimenopause is killing us and sometimes you need to be a Karen. Common courtesy is dead, more extreme body mods, don't stiff nice servers or put out cigarettes on the windows.

    For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!
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    2 hrs and 12 mins
  • 313: You Better Run

    313: You Better Run
    Aug 15 2025
    Happy Anniversary, Mexico was eventful, Crystal is not a traveler and Peez is a sour patch kid. Pat doesn’t own a mop, school is starting, no toilet services, and no more missionaries.

    For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!
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    2 hrs and 38 mins
  • 312: Elizabeth?

    312: Elizabeth?
    Jul 31 2025
    Back on black cohosh, we have a new baby, this weekend was scary and we need a carpenter. Childhood photos, cannibal sandwiches, humans are still a disappointment and protect the geniuses.

    For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!
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    1 hr and 42 mins
  • 311: Golden River

    311: Golden River
    Jul 24 2025
    Crystal got her hair done and a new piercing, 4loko cans are a warning, thrift prices are disrespectful and Pat got some bad news. Don’t puke in the sink, avoid mud while on adventures, cops shouldn’t be hitting anyone and Peez is in love.

    For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!
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    2 hrs and 7 mins
  • 310: A Sad Origin Story

    310: A Sad Origin Story
    Jul 17 2025
    Things are getting better, Peez is hoarding, OCD just doesn’t make sense and farewell Great America. Crystal is still terrorizing Pat’s dreams, Trump didn’t get shot, uniqueness reigns supreme and there’s been a lot of crazy news.

    For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!
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    2 hrs and 22 mins
  • 309: 309 - What Binders?

    309: 309 - What Binders?
    Jul 9 2025
    Pat is playing referee, Sunday was a flop, Crystal has been writing and was asked to babysit. RIP Amanda, no more pets, random singing and our government lies in our face.

    For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!
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    1 hr and 59 mins
  • 308: A Summer Treat

    308: A Summer Treat
    Jul 3 2025
    RIP Antonio, we’re sweaty, Pat’s back is broken and CA has some new laws. Don’t get fake abs, change your towels out, OCD sometimes promotes good habits and billionaires aren’t good people.

    For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!
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    1 hr and 39 mins