Episodes

  • How It Feels to Fall for a Boy for the First Time

    How It Feels to Fall for a Boy for the First Time
    Aug 6 2025
    Did someone order an episode of Love, Victor? This week, we’re talking our first gay romances. Joe met a boy at the Met and spent the summer in museum corners, on crowded trains, on dates that felt like a movie. Andrew kissed someone under fireworks and fell into weeks of new friends, nights at Stonewall, rose petals, the works. It was tender. It was formative. It was a little embarrassing in retrospect. New episodes drop Thursdays at 8PM EST on Patreon. No filter. No notes. No pants (optional): https://www.patreon.com/goodchildrenpod Joe’s Chase Sapphire referral link: https://www.referyourchasecard.com/19t/Z5YLLGK01K Click it and earn points. He’s serious. This is not an ad. HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmonson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/goodchildrenpod https://www.instagram.com/joehegyes/ https://www.instagram.com/andrewmuscarella Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 11 mins
  • Going to Poundtown at the Beach

    Going to Poundtown at the Beach
    Jul 30 2025
    Good Children: The Podcast is known for its fearless, unflinching commitment to investigative journalism. This week, we take on the most urgent question of our time: why does summer in New York City make us so h*rny, sweaty, and lowkey depressed? From cruising at the beach to falling in love on the L train, we examine the intersection of heat, humidity, and boob sweat. Guys I’m so serious, use my Chase Sapphire referral link so we all win. Earn 100,000 points with Sapphire Reserve® or 75,000 bonus points with Sapphire Preferred®: https://www.referyourchasecard.com/19t/Z5YLLGK01K THIS IS NOT AN AD! Find us on Patreon: no filter, no notes, and no pants (optional). New episodes drop every Thursday at 8PM EST. Only here: https://www.patreon.com/c/goodchildrenpod HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie EdmonsonLISTEN: https://linktr.ee/goodchildrenFOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:https://www.instagram.com/goodchildrenpodhttps://www.instagram.com/joehegyes/https://www.instagram.com/andrewmuscarella Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 12 mins
  • Sitting, Scooping, and Sucking: Bathroom Politics

    Sitting, Scooping, and Sucking: Bathroom Politics
    Jul 23 2025
    Good Children: The Podcast continues its brave, Pulitzer-adjacent coverage of the issues that matter. This week, we investigate the modern bathroom: a space for releasing, for sucking, for crying, and wondering when you'll buy toilet paper again. From the architectural injustice of door-to-floor stalls to the unspoken rules of public restroom etiquette, we’re naming names, pointing fingers, and asking the question no one else will: do you sit and scoop? Find us on Patreon: no filter, no notes, and no pants (optional). New episodes drop every Thursday at 8PM EST. Only here: https://www.patreon.com/c/goodchildrenpod HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmonson LISTEN: https://linktr.ee/goodchildren FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:https://www.instagram.com/goodchildrenpodhttps://www.instagram.com/joehegyes/https://www.instagram.com/andrewmuscarella Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 5 mins
  • Bagels: A Definitive Ranking

    Bagels: A Definitive Ranking
    Jul 16 2025
    Good Children: The Podcast prides itself on award-winning journalism that isn't afraid to ask the hard-hitting questions that might make other comedian podcast duos uncomfortable. This week, we're tackling our toughest subject yet: would you f*ck that bagel? Find us on Patreon: no filter, no notes, and no pants (optional). New episodes drop every Thursday at 8PM EST. Only here: https://www.patreon.com/c/goodchildrenpod HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie EdmonsonLISTEN: https://linktr.ee/goodchildrenFOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:https://www.instagram.com/goodchildrenpodhttps://www.instagram.com/joehegyes/https://www.instagram.com/andrewmuscarella Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 11 mins
  • Early Signs of Daddy Puberty

    Early Signs of Daddy Puberty
    Jul 9 2025
    This week, we’re talking Daddy Puberty: the slow, confusing transformation from boy to twink to… Daddy. Is it a mindset? A muscle mass threshold? A beard-to-hair ratio? We break down the biology, the psychology, and the pop culture mythology of what it really means to enter your Daddy Era. Plus: pop culture daddies from childhood and a debate over whether being called “Daddy” is a compliment or a cry for help. Find us on Patreon: no filter, no notes, and no pants (optional). New episodes drop every Thursday at 8PM EST. Only here: https://www.patreon.com/c/goodchildrenpod HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie EdmonsonLISTEN: https://linktr.ee/goodchildrenFOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:https://www.instagram.com/goodchildrenpodhttps://www.instagram.com/joehegyes/https://www.instagram.com/andrewmuscarella Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 4 mins
  • Escaping The Fire Island Hookup Forest

    Escaping The Fire Island Hookup Forest
    Jul 2 2025
    This week, we embed ourselves deep inside the myth, the legend, the cautionary tale that is Fire Island. Our mission? To uncover the truth behind the infamous Belvedere Hotel, an all-nude, men-only boarding house perched just beyond the bounds of good judgment. What begins as an overnight getaway quickly spirals into blackouts at drag brunch, fighting for our lives in the Meat Rack, and late-night cruising that felt more like The Blair Witch Project than a vacation. Join us as we investigate the intersection of queerness, liberation, and public sex, one towel at a time. Find us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/goodchildrenpod HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie EdmonsonLISTEN: https://linktr.ee/goodchildrenFOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/goodchildrenpod https://www.instagram.com/joehegyes/ https://www.instagram.com/andrewmuscarella Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 17 mins
  • From The Archive: Who Drank At My 17th Birthday Party?

    From The Archive: Who Drank At My 17th Birthday Party?
    Jun 25 2025
    ONE WEEK UNTIL WE'RE BACK WITH NEW EPISODES! Thanks for your patience <3 In the meantime, find us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/goodchildrenpod This week, travel back to a cold case from 2013 in which 12 beer cans were discovered at Joe's 17th birthday party. HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew MuscarellaLISTEN: https://linktr.ee/goodchildrenFOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/goodchildrenpod https://www.instagram.com/joehegyes/ https://www.instagram.com/andrewmuscarella Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    47 mins
  • From The Archive: Bear in the Woods (S4E7)

    From The Archive: Bear in the Woods (S4E7)
    Jun 19 2025
    Thank you for your patience as we plan our next season, we'll be back shortly with brand new episodes starting in July! (Happy Pride Month, am I right?) Until then, join us for a weekend in nature that changed our lives forever.* *a few weeks. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewmuscarella FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK: @goodchildrenpod @bequietjoe @andrew_musky Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 30 mins