What if the biggest relationship challenge in your home isn't a communication problem — it's an ADHD brain that nobody ever explained to you?

In this eye-opening episode, Tera sits down with ADHD expert, educator, and coach Martha Hoffman (host of ADHD in the Real World podcast) to unpack what ADHD actually looks like in real families, real marriages, and real emotional lives — and why compassion might be the most powerful tool you have.

Whether you're a parent who suspects your child might have ADHD, a partner frustrated by what feels like chaos, or someone who scrolled through a "signs of ADHD" reel and thought "wait... that's me" — this conversation will change how you see the people you love most.

In This Episode You'll Learn:

• The 3 types of ADHD and why it looks completely different in women vs. men
• Why emotional dysregulation is now considered CORE to ADHD — not just a side effect
• The dopamine deficit connection — and why your ADHD brain might be wired for addiction
• How to build a "Dopamine Menu" to replace cheap hits with lasting satisfaction
• What Fair Play facilitation does for ADHD couples — and why the trash is never just "taking out the trash"
• How Tera uses the Core Emotion Wheel with her ADHD kids — and what shifted for her family
• Martha's own Core Emotion Wheel — vulnerability in real time
• How to respond when a partner or parent refuses to believe the ADHD diagnosis is real

Resources Mentioned:

• Core Emotion Wheel: www.connectioncodes.co/podcast

• Book a Connection Codes Coach: https://connectioncodes.co/coaches

• Martha Hoffman Coaching on Instagram: @MarthaHoffmanCoaching

• Martha's website: MarthaHoffmanCoaching.com

• Martha's podcast: ADHD in the Real World

Keywords/Tags:

ADHD and marriage, emotional dysregulation ADHD, neurodivergent relationships, ADHD parenting, ADHD in women, ADHD emotional health, dopamine deficit, ADHD diagnosis adults, mental health and marriage, Core Emotion Wheel, connection codes podcast, ADHD coaching, ADHD fair play, neurodivergent family, ADHD relationships, emotional regulation

What if the reason you can't sleep, can't focus, and come home completely depleted has nothing to do with your schedule — and everything to do with what you're doing to your emotions?

In this episode, Dr. Glenn Hill, Phyllis Hill, and Tera Wages go deep on one of the most important — and most overlooked — tools in the Connection Codes toolkit: oohing yourself. Not your partner. Not your kids. Yourself.

We've all been taught some version of "don't be emotional," "choose joy," "power through." But what that messaging actually does is train us to reject ourselves at the deepest level. And the cost? It shows up in your body, your sleep, your productivity, your relationships, and your health.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why suppressing emotions doesn't make them disappear — it sends them straight into your cells (and the science behind what that does to your body)
• The 3 powerful questions that help you tune into yourself in under 60 seconds
• How a woman's 12-year battle with insomnia ended after one night of doing the Core Emotion Wheel
• Why "positive thinking" culture may actually be working against your emotional health
• The real reason you have nothing left for your spouse and kids at the end of the day
• How to process fear, shame, and hurt in 10–15 seconds (without a therapy session)
• What Tera discovered about herself, her kids, and the mistakes she made before she had these tools

This episode is for you if:You've tried the productivity hacks, the sleep supplements, the mindset work — but something still feels stuck. Or if you teach communication tools to others and still forget to use them on yourself (yes, Tera goes there).

Resources mentioned:

• 🌀 Download the Core Emotion Wheel: www.connectioncodes.co/podcast
• 🤝 Book a certified Connection Codes Coach: connectioncodes.co/coaches
• 📚 Start with Foundations: connectioncodes.co/foundations

Keywords: emotional health, marriage advice, mental health awareness, emotional intelligence, relationship communication, burnout recovery, emotional regulation, self-awareness, anxiety relief, insomnia and emotions, leadership emotional health, marriage therapy tools, how to process emotions, core emotion wheel

The Power of Active Listening: How Oooo Transforms Conflict Into Connection.

What if the secret to emotional regulation in your marriage wasn't another therapy session, but a simple audible response that releases oxytocin in your brain?

In Part 2 of our active listening series, Dr. Glenn Hill and Phyllis Hill dive deep into what stops us from connecting during conflict – and the surprising brain science behind why "oohing" your partner actually works.

• The oxytocin effect: How active listening naturally releases connection chemicals in the brain (no pills required)
• When you feel attacked: How to use curiosity instead of defensiveness when your partner comes at you with accusations
• The "never/always" trap: Why correcting your partner's exaggerations kills connection (and what to do instead)
• Processing emotion first: Why you must acknowledge feelings before discussing logistics
• The right of refusal: How to know the difference between everyday conflict and abuse
• Issue-specific wheels: When to pull out the Core Emotion Wheel during heated moments
• Saying "ow" in the moment: Why you need to acknowledge your own hurt while still being present for your partner

Glenn and Phyllis share vulnerable stories about their own disconnection – from the dishwasher incident to cruise conflicts – demonstrating how Connection Codes tools work in real marriage dynamics.

This episode is essential for anyone who:

• Gets defensive when their partner expresses hurt
• Feels like they're being attacked even in simple conversations
• Wants to understand the neuroscience of emotional connection
• Struggles to stay curious when emotions run high
• Needs practical tools for de-escalating conflict quickly

Get the Core Emotion Wheel: www.connectioncodes.co/podcast

Book a Connection Codes Coach: https://connectioncodes.co/coaches

Join the School of Connection waitlist: Limited cohorts opening May 2026

Shop Connection Codes Merch: Magnets, stickers, and wheels for every room

Keywords: emotional regulation, marriage communication, active listening, relationship conflict resolution, oxytocin and connection, defensiveness in marriage, emotional health tools, curiosity in relationships, connection codes, core emotion wheel, marriage therapy alternatives, healthy communication skills, conflict de-escalation, mental health in relationships, relationship coaching