In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne and Dr. Kathy explore a fascinating report published in Science examining nearly 35,000 elite performers. The surprising conclusion? Many of the world's most accomplished musicians, scientists, athletes, and chess masters were not early prodigies. In fact, early specialization often predicts burnout rather than lifelong excellence.

That challenges modern parenting.

In a culture that pushes optimization, early reading programs, elite travel teams, and accelerated academics, many parents feel pressure to help their children get ahead and stay ahead. But what if early polish is not the same as deep potential? What if rushing specialization actually limits exploration?

Dr. Kathy unpacks the deeper motivations behind our desire for prodigious children. Sometimes it's fear. Sometimes it's pride. Sometimes it's a longing for ease. And sometimes it's the subtle temptation to tie our identity to our children's performance.

The conversation moves beyond academics into identity formation. When competence becomes the foundation of a child's worth, the pyramid flips upside down. Security, not performance, must come first. Children thrive when they know they are loved unconditionally, when their identity is anchored in Christ, and when their gifts are discerned rather than demanded.

In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch explore a growing trend among so called "TV Moms," parents who allow television freely but restrict personal devices like iPads and phones. Is there really a difference? Or is all screen time the same?

Drawing on current research and practical parenting experience, Dr. Kathy explains why screens are not created equal. Television can become communal and conversational when used intentionally. Personal devices, however, are engineered for individual consumption and often create emotional ownership that's harder for kids to relinquish. But even TV loses its value when it becomes constant background noise.

The deeper concern isn't just screen exposure, it's what screens are replacing. Quiet. Conversation. Boredom. Creative play. Relational engagement. In a culture where something is always on, children are losing the natural rhythms that form identity: sitting, walking, listening, asking, and wondering. When noise fills every space, wisdom has no room to rise.

Dr. Kathy reminds parents that quiet is not empty. Quiet is formative. It's where discernment grows, where creativity sparks, where the Holy Spirit speaks. Identity is shaped not by constant input but by repeated relational moments in which children feel known and guided.

This episode challenges parents to reconsider not just how much media their kids consume, but whether screens are crowding out the spaces where character, connection, and confidence are built.

In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch explore a sobering reality: up to 70–80% of young adults aging out of foster care face homelessness, incarceration, addiction, or mental health struggles within just two years. What happens when young people are forced to launch without a runway?

The conversation moves from foster care to the everyday home. While many parents joke about 18 being the "launch date," real readiness isn't about a birthday; it's about preparation. Dr. Kathy unpacks how confidence and competence are built over time through identity formation, financial literacy, character development, and gradual responsibility. Launching isn't abrupt independence; it's scaffolded growth.

Using the image of learning to ride a bike, from tricycles to training wheels to open pavement, this episode reminds parents that scars are part of growth. Falling while learning to walk didn't mean failure. It meant development. The same is true when young adults stumble in the early stages of independence.

Ultimately, the deepest runway parents can build isn't dependence on mom and dad, but security in Christ. When identity is rooted in Jesus, young adults carry with them wisdom, conviction, companionship, and courage wherever they go. True launch readiness isn't just financial or emotional, it's spiritual.

If you're wondering how to raise kids who can step into adulthood with clarity and resilience, this episode will give you both vision and practical encouragement.

In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch step into one of the most common and uncomfortable parenting conversations: How do we explain where babies come from without confusing or misleading our kids?

The discussion is sparked by a popular podcast moment in which a celebrity mom offers a simple explanation: "When two people love each other enough, their love gets them a baby." While well-intentioned, Wayne and Dr. Kathy explore why answers like this, though emotionally appealing, can quietly create confusion or misunderstanding in a child's mind.

Using a memorable ice-skating analogy, the episode acknowledges how slippery these conversations can feel for parents. But avoiding them doesn't make kids safer; it just sends them elsewhere for answers. Dr. Kathy explains why parents must be the trusted authority on questions about bodies, intimacy, and life, and why clarity matters even when the details are age-appropriate and gradual.

Rooted in Psalm 139, the episode reassures parents that a child's worth is never defined by how they were conceived, but by who created them. When kids eventually learn the fuller story of biology, relationships, or even painful family circumstances, honest foundations help them feel secure rather than misled.

Wayne and Dr. Kathy encourage parents to speak the truth with care, to name body parts accurately, to explain intimacy appropriately, and to always frame life as something intentionally crafted by God. Kids can handle reality when it's delivered with love, wisdom, and patience.

This episode equips parents to step onto the ice with confidence, helping their children grow in understanding without fear, and letting truth become a bright light that cuts through confusion later in life.

In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch unpack why Celebrate Kids has joined the "Greater Than Campaign," a broad coalition led by organizations like Them Before Us, Focus on the Family, and the Colson Center, all centered on one conviction: children's needs come before adult desires.

Rather than framing the conversation as political or reactionary, Wayne and Dr. Kathy explain why this issue is fundamentally about children's wellbeing, identity, and long-term flourishing. Drawing from Scripture, research, and lived experience, they clarify that supporting children does not require hostility toward others, but it does require moral clarity and courage.

The episode addresses one of the hardest tensions parents and Christians face today: how to affirm the dignity of every person while still advocating for what Scripture and evidence consistently show is best for kids, being raised, whenever possible, by a committed mother and father. Dr. Kathy emphasizes that this is not about attacking anyone's identity, but about being for children in a culture that increasingly asks them to absorb adult choices and consequences.

Wayne and Dr. Kathy also speak honestly about the cost of silence. When Christians withdraw from difficult conversations, children are left without advocates. Drawing on Jesus' words in Matthew 19, the episode reframes this moment as one in which believers are called not to win arguments, but to steward the vulnerable, placing kids where Jesus placed them: at the center.

This conversation offers parents the language, confidence, and steadiness to navigate these discussions with neighbors, friends, and even their own children. It reminds listeners that hard teachings are still loving teachings, and that standing for kids, even when misunderstood, is one of the clearest ways to reflect Christ in a confusing world.

Listeners are encouraged to explore the Greater Than campaign through the show notes and prayerfully consider how they might support efforts that put children first.

What if the words we speak over our kids aren't just communication, but are actually creation? In this episode of Facing in the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy tackle a new claim from psychologist Dr. Chelsea Haug-Zavaleta that children should receive 100 compliments a day to thrive emotionally. Dr. Kathy challenges the research, explaining that it's not about the number of compliments, it's about the ratio of affirmation to correction and the meaning behind our words. She offers practical insights for balancing affirmation with healthy boundaries, showing how kids form identity through the voices they trust most. Together, Wayne and Dr. Kathy unpack what it means to parent fragile and resilient kids, share how correction can build character rather than shame, and connect the science of affirmation to the biblical power of blessing from Genesis 27. This episode reminds us that spoken love forms lasting truth, and that a few sincere words can build what a hundred empty praises never could.

In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy respond to a landmark legal case that is already reshaping conversations around gender, medicine, and parental fear. A 22-year-old woman, who identified as male as a teenager, was awarded $2 million after a jury found that medical professionals failed to follow standards of care when approving irreversible surgery while she was still a minor. The case raises sobering questions about pressure, fear, consent, and what happens when adults rush to solve a child's distress rather than fully understanding it.

Rather than debating politics or policy, this conversation centers on parents, especially those who feel trapped between wanting their child to be safe, wanting them to be happy, and being told that immediate medical intervention is the only loving option. Dr. Kathy speaks candidly about how fear, particularly fear fueled by suicide narratives, can override discernment, silence conscience, create fear, and lead families to decisions they never imagined they would make.

The episode explores a crucial distinction: dissatisfaction is not the same as identity. Many kids experience discomfort with their bodies, peer rejection, teasing, or confusion during puberty, but discomfort does not automatically require eradication. Dr. Kathy challenges parents to ask better questions, slow the process down, and help children understand why they feel dissatisfied before affirming irreversible conclusions.

Drawing from Raising Gender-Confident Kids, the discussion reframes confidence not as denying struggle, but as building the moral and emotional "chest" that helps children hold discomfort without being swept away by fear or cultural pressure. Parents are encouraged to walk with their kids through seasons of confusion, offering presence, truth, protection, and endurance, rather than rushing to solutions that promise immediate relief but carry lifelong consequences.

Rooted in Scripture, the episode reminds listeners that many temptations come dressed as compassion, offering partial truths without full disclosure of cost. Children are especially vulnerable to these narratives when adults bypass conscience in the name of urgency. True love, the hosts argue, does not panic; it shepherds.

This episode offers parents courage, clarity, and hope: you are not cruel for slowing down, asking questions, or helping your child sit with discomfort. In fact, that steady presence may be the very thing that forms confidence, resilience, and lasting peace.

For years, success has been measured by degrees earned, income achieved, titles held, and recognition gained. But what happens when those markers keep shifting, leaving people exhausted and unsatisfied? In this episode of Facing the Dark, Wayne Stender and Dr. Kathy Koch wrestle with a growing cultural question: If we don't define success for our kids, who will, and will they like where it leads them?

Drawing from a recent EdSurge reflection, the conversation explores how achievement based definitions of success often move the goalposts endlessly, leaving even high achievers feeling behind. Dr. Kathy challenges parents to recognize that children are always watching, not just what we say success is, but what we live as if it is. Our calendars, conversations, sacrifices, and celebrations quietly teach our kids what matters most.

Rather than anchoring success to prestige or productivity, Dr. Kathy reframes it through a Christ centered lens: identity in Christ, lives marked by abundance rather than accumulation, and purpose expressed through service and sacrifice. Success, she argues, is not about becoming impressive, but about becoming who God created you to be and stewarding that calling with competence and faithfulness.

Rooted in the biblical story of Bezalel, the craftsman called and equipped by God, this episode reminds parents that Scripture celebrates faithful skill and obedience far more than status or acclaim. When children are taught that success means living with integrity and purpose before God, they gain clarity in a world eager to define them by outcomes alone.

This conversation invites parents to reclaim the definition of success, not as something to chase endlessly, but as a life of abundance and faithful stewardship.