• Mass Debate: Who Was the Best Spider-Man? - Garfield vs Holland vs Maguire
    Feb 3 2026

    On this week's episode, it’s a tangled web of chaos as Jed, Kirk, and special guest Jonathan "G-Man" Goolsby swing headfirst into the great power, great responsibility, and greatly unnecessary drama of Who Was the Best Spider-Man: Garfield, Holland, or Maguire? Kirk crawls in early with Team Holland, claiming Tom’s the perfect hybrid of teen awkwardness and proven hero, and boasting more MCU movies under his belt than Aunt May has lovers post-Uncle Ben. Jed clings to the wall of nostalgia like a radioactive barnacle, swearing Tobey set the gold standard with the best villains, best crying face, and best ability to look 32 in high school. Then G-Man ziplines in, shirtless in spirit, insisting Andrew Garfield was “the sexiest Spider snack of them all”, praising his temple-tier body, hunky swag, and ability to thwip his way into your heart and pants.

    But when the Balls-to-the-Wall Q&A starts, G-Man gets caught in his own web of confusion, mixing up villains like a drunk multiverse, crediting Garfield with fighting Sandman and Vulture in a three way cage match. Jed pirouettes around questions about Tobey’s geriatric high school era, while Kirk plays the "emotional resonance" card so hard it nearly swings the debate into therapy. Moderator Kraig tries to keep the web untangled, but by the end, everyone’s stuck in their own Spidey logic. It’s Peter vs Peter vs Peter in a multiversal mess of spandex, sobbing, and suspicious timelines on this amazing, spectacular, web-slinging episode of Mass Debate!

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    27 mins
  • Mass Debate: Which Animal Would Win in a Fight to the Death? - Giraffe vs Rhinoceros
    Jan 27 2026

    On this week's episode, it’s the clash of the savanna titans as Kraig and special guest Chris Morris square off in a fight to the death between a giraffe and a rhinoceros. Kraig gallops out of the gate swinging...literally, claiming the giraffe is nature’s sleeper agent, lulling foes into a false sense of serenity before going full Happy Gilmore with that neck-meets-sledgehammer skull. Chris isn't fazed, describing the rhino as a low-to-the-ground girth goblin built for one thing: nut-seeking destruction. He claims that one well-placed horn jab would turn the giraffe’s majestic stride into a tragic, nutless wobble. Kraig fires back that giraffes are limber legends, capable of ballerina-level footwork and dodging like a goddamn leaf in the wind. But Chris shuts it down by calling the giraffe “a sentient crane on stilts” and insists a single leg hit would turn that longboi into a falling Jenga tower. Moderator Kirk tries to keep the beastly bloodbath cordial, while Hung Juror Jed starts sketching Geoffrey Giraffe-Rocksteady fanfic in his notes. It’s length vs girth and elegance vs obliteration, on this savagely stupid episode of Mass Debate!

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    22 mins
  • Mass Debate: Who is the Better Character? - Rambo vs The Terminator
    Jan 20 2026

    On this week's episode, bullets fly and logic dies as Kraig and special guest Ian Picciano square off over which cinematic badass reigns supreme: Rambo or The Terminator? Kraig bursts in shirtless and waving a flag, declaring Rambo an all-American meat missile, forged in the fires of freedom and shirtless vengeance. But Ian doesn’t flinch, calmly revealing that the Terminator is literally made of American steel and could crush Rambo like a juice box in a minefield. Kraig fumbles the flag and backpedals hard, scrambling to rebrand the Terminator as some secret ICE-funded robo-narc, only for Ian to shut it down by quoting Kraig’s own anti-Terminator rant from two minutes earlier. With his logic bleeding out, Kraig attempts a desperate pivot, shouting “Okay fine—Rambo vs Sarah Connor, then!” Moderator Jed just blinks in disbelief, while Hung Juror Kirk wonders aloud if they’re debating or auditioning for Expendables 7: Midlife Crisis Reloaded. It's flesh vs metal, freedom vs firmware, and the collapse of rhetorical dignity on this episode of Mass Debate!

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    23 mins
  • Mass Debate: Which Dakota is Better? - South vs North
    Jan 13 2026

    On this week's episode, the battle lines are drawn straight across the Great Plains as special guest Andy Bateman and Jed face off over one burning question: Which Dakota is better - South or North? Andy comes out swinging with the geographic equivalent of a mic drop, firing off location names like Wall Drug, Mount Rushmore, and Sturgis with zero context but maximum devastation. Jed, meanwhile, stares into the void, realizing North Dakota may just be a Canadian buffer zone with oil money and stars. As Andy continues steamrolling with pure noun-based dominance, things take a surreal turn when he starts coaching Jed mid-debate, casually offering North Dakota facts like a bored TA watching a freshman flounder through a book report. Moderator Kraig tries to keep a straight face, while Hung Juror Kirk silently draws a buffalo on his notepad and writes “pray 4 Jed” underneath. Watch in real time as Jed’s will to argue evaporates somewhere between Minot and existential dread - on this absolutely directionless episode of Mass Debate!

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    26 mins
  • Mass Debate: Which Character Was the Cooler 80s Toy? - Teddy Ruxpin vs My Pet Monster
    Jan 6 2026

    On this week's episode, it’s plush-on-plush carnage as Jed and JT try to stuff each other over which 80s icon was the cooler toy: Teddy Ruxpin or My Pet Monster? Jed rolls in hard on Team Ruxpin, calling him “the animatronic king of the toy aisle”, a storytelling legend with more charm than a Care Bear on quaaludes. But things take a hard emotional turn when Jed reveals he never actually owned a Teddy Ruxpin, tearfully confessing his childhood was filled with bootleg bedtime hugs from a stuffed sock stitched together by his nanny. JT counters from Team Monster, arguing My Pet Monster was the blue-furred underdog of childhood trauma, ugly enough to make any kid feel quite dashing by comparison. He paints Teddy as a bougie Pooh Bear knockoff, floating around in his airship like a rich kid who only played cassette tapes from NPR. As the sobs clash with sarcasm, Moderator Kirk tries to hold the threadbare argument together while Hung Juror Kraig slowly handcuffs himself in solidarity with the Monster. It’s prestige vs punk rock, circuits vs chains, and a whole lotta unresolved toy store trauma on this cuddly, chaotic episode of Mass Debate!

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    21 mins
  • Mass Debate: Which Boogie is Best? - Boot Scootin' Boogie vs Electric Boogie
    Dec 30 2025

    On this week's episode, sparks fly and boots stomp as special guest Chris Morris and resident cowboy Jed go toe-to-toe over Which Boogie is Best: Boot Scootin’ Boogie or the Electric Boogie? Chris slides into Team Electric with confidence, praising it as a cross-cultural groove that unites weddings, cookouts, and awkward party goers across the globe. But Jed ain't havin’ it! He straps on his spurs and defends Boot Scootin’ like it's the last honky tonk on Earth, accusing Chris of spittin’ in the face of hard-working Americans and the daisy duke divas who make line dancing worth watching. Chris claps back, calling Boot Scootin’ a glorified shuffle for drunk hillbillies in belt buckles too big to fail, while praising the Electric Slide for having actual choreography and not just cardio with a cowboy hat. Moderator Kraig tries to keep the peace but accidentally reignites the dance floor war every time he claps on the 1 and 3. Hung Juror Kirk just stands silently in shock and awe, swaying slightly, unsure which direction to slide. Country kicks or electric flicks - somebody’s gettin’ served on this sh!t-kickin’ episode of Mass Debate!

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    24 mins
  • Mass Debate: Is Mariah Carey's "All I Want For Christmas Is You" the Greatest Christmas Song? - Throat GOAT vs Overplayed Note
    Dec 23 2025

    On this week's episode the eggnog is flowing, the sleigh bells are ringing, and the claws are out as Kirk and Jed square off over the Queen of Christmas herself with the question: Is Mariah Carey’s holiday earworm “All I Want for Christmas Is You” the greatest Xmas song of all time? Kirk comes in hotter than chestnuts on an open fire, praising Mariah as a divine snow-dusted goddess of holiday cheer, whose high notes could thaw even the iciest of cold hearts. Jed, meanwhile, argues the song is audio fruitcake, engineered in a lab to torture retail workers, steal husbands, and kill the American Christmas from the inside out. Kirk accuses Jed of being a frosty Scrooge with a lump of coal where his soul should be, while Jed claims the track is less Silent Night, and more Sinful Delight. Moderator Kraig can barely keep the tinsel from catching fire, and Hung Juror JT remains silent but his blinking pattern appears to either be Morse code for "make it stop", or signs of an oncoming Yuletide stroke. Naughty, nice, or just unhinged, this one will leave you ho-ho-horrified on this episode of Mass Debate!

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    23 mins
  • Mass Debate: Is Die Hard a Christmas Movie? - Yippee-Ki-Yay vs Yippee-Ki-Nay
    Dec 16 2025

    Grab your eggnog and settle in by the fire, because on this week's episode things get festively explosive as Kraig and special guest Adam Draper jingle each other's bells over one burning question: Is Die Hard a Christmas movie? Yippee-Ki-Yay…or Yippee-Ki-Nay? Adam steps in with cold, calculated cheerlessness, arguing that Die Hard lacks the holy trinity of Christmas essentials: snow, presents, and a fat guy in red. But Kraig, twinkling with delusion and a jiggle to his belly, declares that Argyle the limo driver is clearly McClane’s weed-smoking holiday elf, claiming that blazing mistletoe in the back of the limo is the emotional North Star of the entire film. Adam stares blankly into the abyss, trying to recall the part of Die Hard where Argyle sprouts a pointy hat, jingles when he walks, and reports back to Santa between blunts. Moderator Kirk just wants to get through the night with his Yule Log intact, while Hung Juror Jed starts humming “Let It Blow” and offers to settle things with a snowball fight and some hot Bavarian nuts. It’s chaos wrapped up with a pretty little bow and a stocking filled with confusion, conviction, and holiday hallucinations on this holly jolly episode of Mass Debate!

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    17 mins