In this episode, we read a letter from a listener who has spent her life being criticised by her mother — called “stupid,” shamed about her body, and told she was a mistake. When she shared the news of her engagement, her mother ignored her for a week. When she tried to express how hurt she felt, she was accused of “looking for trouble” and acting as if she thought she was better than everyone else.

She’s now considering taking a break from the relationship and is asking a question many adult children quietly carry: Is it okay to step back, even when it’s your mother?
We explore what chronic criticism does to the nervous system, why attempts at repair often get turned back on the child, and how to think about distance or no contact in a way that centres safety, self-trust, and emotional reality — not guilt or obligation.

This episode is for anyone navigating the painful space between longing for a different parent and choosing themselves anyway.

Follow Dr. Ruth Callaghan on TikTok

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www.callaghancounselling.ie

The C.A.L.M Method

A proven process that will take you from chaos to calm in 6 weeks!

Doors open January 26th - Join the Waitlist today

Calmer parenting and a happier home and kids is so much closer than you think

I can't wait to see you there x

Katie McKenna

Accredited Psychotherapist, Podcast Host, Author

BEYOND SURVIVAL - The Therapy Podcast

In this episode we hear from a listener who has navigated years of emotional turmoil within her blended family.

After a life-threatening childbirth, she faced ongoing manipulation, smear campaigns, and boundary violations from her mother-in-law, who sided with her husband’s ex and sought to control their family.

This powerful story explores the exhaustion of protecting your marriage and family while maintaining your own sense of self, and the ongoing challenge of living your truth in the face of disbelief and manipulation.

Follow Dr. Ruth Callaghan on TikTok

Follow Dr. Callaghan on Instagram

www.callaghancounselling.ie

The C.A.L.M Method

A proven process that will take you from chaos to calm in 6 weeks!

Doors open January 26th - Join the Waitlist today

Calmer parenting and a happier home and kids is so much closer than you think

I can't wait to see you there x

Katie McKenna

Accredited Psychotherapist, Podcast Host, Author

BEYOND SURVIVAL - The Therapy Podcast

When you leave a narcissistic family system, the separation rarely ends with you. Often, it comes with a quiet guilt for the sibling left behind - and for the children who loved the version of the family you worked so hard to preserve.

In this week’s episode, we reflect on a letter from a listener who shares the painful complexity of this experience. For ten years, she helped her children see the good in her parents - explaining that love could look different, facilitating online contact, and enduring occasional visits that were deeply upsetting for her. She believed she could hold the pain so her children wouldn’t have to.

Now, with no contact in place, her children are grieving grandparents they experienced as kind, and an uncle they experienced as funny. She writes about how hard it is to explain boundaries when you’re still trying to understand them yourself - and the heartbreak of knowing that safety and protecting you kids, doesn’t always feel that way to a child.

This episode explores the layered grief of leaving, the guilt that follows, and the slow, careful work of helping children understand emotional safety - not through blame or character assassination, but through truth, regulation, and compassion.

If you’ve ever questioned whether you did the right thing, or felt torn between protecting your children and breaking their hearts, this conversation is for you.

Follow Dr. Ruth Callaghan on Instagram

Follow Ruth on TikTok

www.callaghancounselling.ie

The C.A.L.M Method

A proven process that will take you from chaos to calm in 6 weeks!

Doors open January 26th - Join the Waitlist today

Calmer parenting and a happier home and kids is so much closer than you think

I can't wait to see you there x

Katie McKenna

Accredited Psychotherapist, Podcast Host, Author

BEYOND SURVIVAL - The Therapy Podcast