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Validation

The New Psychology of Influence

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Validation

By: Caroline Fleck
Narrated by: Caroline Fleck
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Unlock the secret to true and lasting change

'A crash course in the most important skills for forging connection and fuelling change.' ADAM GRANT

'Profound, important, compassionate, Validation took my breath away.' AMY EDMONDSON

We all spend a huge amount of time trying to get people to listen to us, and despite our best efforts, we often fail. But what if the secret to influencing others was in first accepting them?

This is known as validation: the act of showing someone that you understand their experience and accept it as valid.

As both a means and an end, validation skills are proven to impact five key areas of our life: enhancing our relationships, de-escalating conflict, increasing our ability to drive behaviour change, influencing growth in others, and developing a stronger connection to self. In this groundbreaking book, Stanford University psychologist Caroline Fleck explains why validation is a catalyst for transformation, and shares her step-by-step framework to put this powerful skillset into practice.

©2025 Caroline Fleck (P)2025 Orion Publishing Group Limited Emotions Personal Development Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Relationships Mental Health
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All stars
Most relevant
What I love about this book:
* Really gets into the fine detail of how relationships can be improved, or could get off track.
* Lots of relatable examples to illustrate the steps of validation
* Pleasant voice and humour
* Goes beyond validation to introducing how it can be combined with an understanding of operant conditioning to enhance the effectiveness of both strategies
* It has a humorous and moving cat story, which is also educational.

Thanks Caroline, this book is so helpful.

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This book makes explicit skills that we all presume adults have but struggle to be able to explain. The author contextualises DBT skills to everyday situations that require quite sophisticated validation. Caroline's own story is artfully integrated into the exposition of how to validate. My one issue with this book would be the use of the term punishment which seems to be true to Skinners ideas of behaviourism but doesn't translate so well outside of psychology i.e. to popular culture. This is a minor point and it is still certainly worth the listen!

A much needed book on Validation

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