Edward was a respectable architect when a disagreement over the wrong shade of Georgian red with Aubyn, a mean-spirited conservation officer, saw the full force of the law applied. Ian had been a successful accountant until he was shafted by dodgy PPI pusher Kevin. Their lives tumble and they end up in prison, where they meet Nelson, banged up after stealing a sapphire and a Bentley from a contessa in Monaco. An early release prompts Edward, Ian, and Nelson to take a road trip in search of a new life, revenge, and adventure. Will the vintage Bentley manage the trip?

Arthur Cholmondely-Godstone is in the business of pensions. He offers a unique pension, from a nonreturnable sum, and he introduces his clients to a new way of living. He encourages them to explore radical views, try extreme sports and to eat, drink and smoke as much as they can. Or put another way, Arthur does his best to kill them.

Gerry doesn't get out much, but when he does he encounters Mandy - free, a little wild, and half his age. But by day Gerry is Gerrard, who is not only married, he’s a vicar. A vicar with doubts. Although Lucinda, his wife, has very few doubts when a trip to Birmingham goes startlingly right. And ageing gigolo Nelson never sees himself as a messiah until Albert convinces him he can walk on water - or is that just revenge for Nelson having put his head down the toilet at school?

Bryan Brizzard, a notorious bastard and owner of short-haul airline company Bryanair, hates everyone. He hates his suppliers, his employees, his passengers, and his wife and children. But, Dom Hazel discovers, he really loves his poodle, Oodle. And Hazel is an animal assassin. But this time it's a kidnap and Brizzard's mansion is set in the Essex Woods where Hazel, who's trying to be faithful to Julie, finds temptation and confusion. And dogging. The plan threatens to fall apart as Hazel leaves behind more of his DNA than he intends.

Magda cleans up - and it’s more than just housework. She knows all about the call-center worker’s fake dating profiles and what the prospective MP gets up to when he slips into something more comfortable. She even knows about Claire’s secret inheritance, which is more than Claire does - and she knows how to tease out Claire’s husband’s infatuation. But can Magda turn a profit from all this knowledge? A hilarious romp through the private lives that only a cleaner really sees.