Get Your Free Audiobook

Listen with a free trial

1 credit a month to use on any title, yours to keep (you’ll use your first credit on this title).
Stream or download thousands of included titles.
Access to exclusive deals and discounts.
$16.45 a month after 30 day trial. Cancel anytime.
Buy Now for $39.50

Buy Now for $39.50

Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions Of Use and Privacy Notice and authorise Audible to charge your designated credit card or another available credit card on file.

Publisher's Summary

Brought to you by Penguin.

I've had some pretty bad New Year's Eves in my life. But this one was officially...The! Worst! Ever!

My wife had just given birth to a baby that wasn't mine. My son had just walked out on his bride-to-be on the eve of their wedding. And my old dear was making threats of revenge against me for allowing her to choke on the olive from her breakfast martini. 

Throw into the mix three infant sons who were banned from every public park and children's play centre in the city; a father who was working with dodgy Russian business interests to put himself in the Taoiseach's office; and a daughter who was about to do something truly shocking - even by her standards. 

But then, one day, totally out of the blue, I received a very unexpected phone call....

And let's just say that Schmidt got real.

©2019 Ross O'Carroll-Kelly (P)2019 Penguin Audio

What listeners say about Schmidt Happens

Average Customer Ratings
Overall
  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    5
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    0
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
Performance
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    3
  • 4 Stars
    2
  • 3 Stars
    0
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
Story
  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    5
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    0
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

No Reviews are Available
Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Paul Keogan
  • Paul Keogan
  • 02-02-2020

Total class

This was brilliant superbly read by Rory Nolan who MUST now real all of the Ross O’Carroll-Kelly back catalogue. Top notch.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Roisin Gleeson
  • Roisin Gleeson
  • 10-09-2019

usual ross brilliance

I'm delighted that this was published as an audiobook.

what a great way to enjoy Ross!

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Sinead Kaulsay
  • Sinead Kaulsay
  • 25-04-2021

Pissing myself laughing

This book is as good as medicine, even for a Northsider like myself, if you need a good laugh. The narrator is sooo brilliant and funny. I can’t wait to “stort” the next one. Jaysus, I’m speaking like a Southsider now.

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Anonymous User
  • Anonymous User
  • 03-10-2019

Ross meister General

As per usual with Ross it was mental non PC and bloody fantastic - I actually feel part of his family.
Nick

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Amazon Customer
  • Amazon Customer
  • 23-09-2019

Finally on audible!

So glad to finally listen rather than read as struggle to get the time. .can you record your back catalogue? As would listen to them all again..so funny...saves you having to "read" all the accents in your head!!! If you're a Ross o'Carroll Kelly fan you will NOT be disappointed!!

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Brian
  • Brian
  • 19-09-2019

For the love of all that is holy.. Please do more!

Love the book and the performance is spot on. Please....PLEASE......... PLLLEEEASE record the back catalog!!!!!!!

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Fiona O Leary
  • Fiona O Leary
  • 11-01-2021

Would give it 6 stars if possible!!

Hilarious from start to finish. Had me in tears laughing .. From the writing to the narrating.. Superb!!!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for kevin crean
  • kevin crean
  • 08-11-2020

loved every bit

excellent.... more please. at times I was doubled over laughing. can't wait for more. thanks 😊

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Anonymous User
  • Anonymous User
  • 30-09-2020

5 stars

its brilliantly written.. hilarious, witty and entertaining AF. If you are Irish, you have to give it listen.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Siobhan O'Carroll
  • Siobhan O'Carroll
  • 12-07-2020

Kept me tickled during the pandemic.

Kept me tickled with joy, relief and laughter during the pandemic. Brilliant story and observances - brilliant narration!!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Gordon T
  • Gordon T
  • 23-05-2020

Laugh out loud

seriously funny story and great narration. Can't wait for Braywatch. More Audible books please, start at the start!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Mrs K O'Dowd
  • Mrs K O'Dowd
  • 10-11-2019

Hilarious

I love reading all Rock books, but it was just amazing to hear Rory Nolan bring Ross to life in such an excellent delivery.
I would love all the books to be put into audiobook format.
This is a great book, I have come to expect nothing less from Paul Howard. The character development has stayed true to self throughout years of writing and this book is no different. You will belly laugh your way through this one.
Thank you for always delivering!

In the spirit of reconciliation, Audible Australia acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.