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Not the Perfect Victim

My Fight for Survival, Truth and Justice

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Not the Perfect Victim

By: Nikita Hand
Narrated by: Lauren Larkin
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'Raw yet honest ... Hand is unflinching' Irish Times

'Nikita Hand's powerful telling of her trauma ... the narrative is gripping' Irish Independent

December, 2018. The aftermath of a night of revelry. The promise of a party. And a journey into darkness that would change the course of Nikita Hand's life - as she endured a brutal assault where she believed she would die.

Here, Nikita tells her unforgettable story. From the bleak days that followed, reeling in shock and fear, to the long hours as she gave her Garda statement, trusting the truth would be enough. Then months holding her breath, only to discover there would be no prosecution.

When she took the decision that would define her future, Nikita Hand stepped into the glare of a civil case against one of the world's most powerful athletes, Conor McGregor. Through panic attacks, sleepless nights and a terrifying home invasion, she kept going. On into the courtroom, where she faced her perpetrator at arm's length - and spent four gruelling days in the witness box. The judgment would make headlines. The backlash would nearly break her.

Not the Perfect Victim is the unforgettable story of a woman reclaiming her power - a first-hand account of survival, defiance and the hard-won rebuilding of a life no one could take from her.©2026 Nikita Hand (P)2026 Hachette Books Ireland True Crime Women Exciting
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Critic Reviews

Raw yet honest recounting of her experience ... Hand is unflinching
Nikita Hand's powerful telling of her trauma ... truly commendable ... the narrative is gripping throughout
All stars
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What an incredible woman. Heartbreaking story that is beautifully written and narrated. Having followed the trial, I was already very familiar with most of the details however always what’s missing is the lived impact on the victim and their loved ones. It is almost overwhelming to think that in 2026 rape myths are as strong as ever and that men continue to move through the world - aided and abetted by other men - abusing women and in most instances without any justice served. Nikita‘s is just one of these stories. Her bravery, tenacity and strength is inspirational.

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