James D. Beers
AUTHOR

James D. Beers

Comedy & Humour
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James claims that his imagination carried him through the stresses of life. That is until he went to college, got a job, started a career, had kids, and sapped, pummeled, and choked all of his creative brain power through reading and writing about a million technical papers. He’s an archaeologist by day and a writer by night. But he’s not the kind of archaeologist that runs from Nazis, wears a cool hat, and carries a whip. Nope. He sits at a desk and writes technical papers about ancient peoples' trash. He says it's not always as bad as it sounds and that he'll probably write about it...someday. James reads voraciously, taking in every last bit of a story like a half-starved coyote chomping on a bone. At one time he liked the outdoors – hunting, fishing, camping, crick jumping, etc. Then misfortune occurred. He shot an elk in a hole and spent three days getting it out. He caught swamp foot while crick jumping. He took canned split pea soup camping. He ate 30-year-old pancake mix. He developed an allergy to rain (camping = rain). And he got constipated at week-long Scout camp. Every now and again he still finds his way to the woods...cautiously. One other important part of his life is his penchant for everything ice cream (he’s probably eating some right now!). He was raised on vanilla and rocky road – true story. When he left home and could buy his own ice cream, he claims it was like heaven, complete with angels and fluffy white clouds. One of these days he vows to figure out how to make money eating ice cream. Currently, James is working on other short stories about his many humorous adventures growing up in Northern Idaho. He’s also working on a handful of suspense stories set in the 1800s and a couple of middle grade novels. One novel is about a kid inventor who teams up with an injured secret agent to take down a gang of genius bad guys. The other novel is about a boy and his archaeologist uncle who discover ancient runes depicting the mystery of time travel and capturing the attention of a sinister band of tomb raiders who will do anything to get their hands on them. Other than that, James lives in northern Utah with his awesome wife, exceptional son, and crapped-out minivan.
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