Life is full of choices- of chances- of moments. Chances we regret not taking. Choices we wish we could change. And then there are the moments that define us. Kam was my choice.... The one who stole my heart instantly. Kane was my chance.... The one who set me ablaze with just one look. They were my moment.... Two brothers that both owned a part of me. Two brothers that I loved in different ways for different reasons. One brother shattered my heart. The other put it back together. Both changed me forever.

I remember the very first time I laid eyes on Cole Lincoln. It still feels like yesterday when he stumbled into my life with his messy brown hair and dark eyes. Even though I was only 10 years old at the time, I knew right then and there that he was going to change everything. From that point on, Cole and I were always together, inseparable, and I naively believed we'd be best friends forever. But forever didn't last nearly as long as I expected. We grew up and grew apart, life driving the distance between us.

Alec Murray. He was the one. From the first moment I saw him, I knew. I had never been more certain of anything in my 16 years on this Earth. But Alec didn’t notice me. At least not in the way that I wanted him to. He noticed my best friend instead. I stood by and watched their relationship blossom. An outsider looking in, wishing things were different. Torn between my loyalty to my best friend and the boy who had unknowingly stolen my heart. 

Ryland Thorpe taught me the hard way that good doesn’t always win and sometimes the people we trust the most are the ones that can hurt us the deepest. At 15, my world began and ended with him. He was my older brother’s best friend. He was my protector. He was the boy I had loved since I was old enough to understand what loving someone meant. And he was a liar.... It’s been five years since I’ve seen him. Five long years and the memory of him still haunts me like it was yesterday.

It only takes one night-one moment, one small snippet of time-to change everything. At sixteen-years-old, Sebastian Baxter taught me that. He taught me a lot of things. He never had to work for my heart. In some unexplainable way I think it had always belonged to him anyway. Some might think our love story is over, but deep down I know it's only just beginning. Because it's not about where the night begins, it's about where it ends.

Our parents’ friendship meant we had to co-exist. But it didn’t mean we had to like it. He purposely did things to get under my skin. Like spreading rumors about me in junior high so no boys wanted to go out with me. Or sleeping with several of my high school friends, just to prove he could.

I’m falling for the father of the baby I’m carrying. The problem is: it’s not my baby. And the broody widower is not looking for a long-term partner. As a surrogate, the deal was that I’d only be in England long enough to give birth. At first, the man seemed as pretentious as his name: Sigmund Benedictus. He and I butted heads. Sig challenged my intentions, accused me of just wanting to do this for the money. Gradually, he learned to trust me.

Eight years ago I ran. I ran from my parents. I ran from my pain. I ran from him, and I never wanted to go back. If not for my best friend’s wedding, I likely never would have. The plan was simple. Get in, get out. Easy as that. Only I should have known nothing is ever that simple. Especially when Westin Carver is involved. He broke my heart once. Or rather, he completely annihilated it. And I have no doubt that if given the chance, he’d do it all over again. But even knowing that, it doesn’t change the way I crave him

You never get over your first love. It’s something I’ve heard countless times. Like someone has to point out that your pain will never go away. That your shattered heart will never mend. Because that’s exactly what my heart did the day I watched Asher Evans board that train - it shattered, splintering into a million tiny fragments that I didn’t think I’d ever be able to piece back together. He was the boy I had loved since I understood what loving someone mean.

For years, I’ve been planning my escape. Preparing for the day when I could leave home and never look back. But when the moment came, it didn’t happen like I had planned. I didn’t pack up my car and drive away, watching my old life disappear in the rearview mirror like I had always envisioned I would. Instead, I ran — quite literally — as fast and far as my feet would take me. I didn’t know where I was going, only that I had to get away. And that’s when he found me.... 

Life is hard. There’s no secret in that statement. Life. Is. Hard. Simple enough. But my life hasn’t just been hard… I’ve gotten used to it over the years - come to expect it really. So when fate hands me yet another big f--k you, I’m not even a little bit surprised. Why should I be? I mean, after everything I’ve been through, why not throw my best friend’s ex-boyfriend into the mix and see how royally I can screw this up too. It doesn’t matter that he loved her first. It doesn’t matter that he’s wrong for me in every way possible. 

It was destiny - the night I met Hudson Demasi. I remember how effortlessly he stole my heart - his dark eyes and quick smile forever etched into my mind. We spent one incredible night together under a haze of tequila - a perfect night. And when I woke the next day, he was gone. I never expected to see him again - especially not five years later standing on a stage in front of thousands of screaming fans as none other than hot, new country artist, Hudson James. 

I didn’t believe my fractured heart and broken soul could endure any more pain. Until Jared rocks up to the art gallery where I work, with his fiancée in tow, and I’m drowning again. Seeing him brings everything to the surface, so I flee. Placing distance between us again, I’m determined to put him behind me once and for all. Then he reappears at my door, begging me for another chance. I know I should turn him away. Try telling that to my heart.

Ten hours… That’s how much time we spent together. How much time I got with the man whose bright eyes and sultry smile almost made me forget that I was sick. Six hundred minutes… That’s how long it took me to fall in love. Thirty-six thousand seconds... And then it was over. And all I wanted was more. More seconds. More minutes. More hours. More him. Ten hours… Such a small, insignificant amount of time. Yet those ten hours changed everything.

It’s funny how differently we view life when we’re young. Everything feels possible- limitless. If only things could stay that way forever. Then maybe life wouldn’t be so complicated. Maybe Jace would still be the same ten-year-old boy I fell in love with. Maybe I’d still be that same girl too. The girl who believed that there wasn’t anything we couldn’t overcome. But I’m not that girl anymore. Time has beaten me down, broken me, taken everything from me. And it’s taken even more from Jace. I naively believed that I could save him...From his dad. From his anger.