Showing results by narrator "Jasper" in All Categories

I am an orphan, locked away in the abbey. Men call me beautiful, but I am destined for a life working in the kitchens - until the Berserkers capture me. These Viking warriors are cursed, but my heart beats faster in their presence. My insides grow weak, desire filling me like fine wine. They draw wicked feelings from me and make me yearn for more.

Love thy neighbors? No way. Never going to happen. Ethan Burke and Lars Johansen are chiseled male perfection, with their cocky smiles, bulging biceps, and washboard abs. They're also rich, arrogant jerks. Ugh. I’m supposed to swoon over their panty-melting smiles, but I refuse to get the memo. After we feud over a parking spot, I write them into a dirty story. And, when it comes to describing their, ahem, equipment, I get very stingy. How stingy? Think two inches. Bad author. Unfortunately for me, they find the story.

Joining us in the Audible Studios to talk about his latest novel, Early Riser, is British author Jasper Fforde. Known for his Thursday Next series of novels and independent series Nursery Crime and The Dragonslayer, Jasper Fforde is back with a brand-new novel and universe, Early Riser, set in a world where humanity must hibernate during the brutally cold months of winter. Jasper Fforde talks to us about his latest novel, the inspiration behind it and his wild and vivid imagination.

Fate brought the pretty little runaway with defiant green eyes and that sassy mouth to my doorstep. Carrie Smith needs more than shelter. She needs protection. Discipline. A firm hand. She came to the right ranch. I never thought I'd have a wild girl of my own to tame. I'm just the man to tip her across a hay bale and show her who's in charge. But there’s more to this girl than meets the eye. I may give her the discipline she craves, but she'll satisfy my darkest desires. She'll be my one, my only...my babygirl.

Two hours after Dennis proposes, I find my fiancé with his you-know-what buried in Tiffany Slater’s hoohah, and he has the nerve to suggest it’s my fault. Because I’m frigid. Sure, I’ve never had an orgasm with him or with anyone for that matter, but relationships are about more than good nookie. Not that it was ever good. Adequate is more like it. Okay, who am I kidding? Dennis couldn’t find his way down there with a flashlight and a map.

I thought human women were fragile and helpless. Then I met Diana. A pirate. Who knifed me the first time we met. Who makes it clear that she doesn’t need to be rescued. My mate. When we’re not fighting each other, we flirt. I call her spitfire. She promises to burn me. Diana’s warm. Passionate. Daring. I would happily lose myself in her fire. But she's involved herself in a dangerous undertaking. She’s feeding covert intelligence to the Rebellion. And she’s drawn the attention of my mass-murdering psychopath brother.

I’ve lived an eternity. I’ve killed thousands. Destroyed worlds. I thought I’d seen everything. I didn’t think there was anything left in the galaxy that could surprise me. Then I met her. Lani Dennison. A human woman. My mate. My mission was simple. Find Lani Dennison. I expected her to be smart. You’d have to be, to survive the Okaki pirates. I didn’t expect her to be lovely. I didn’t expect her to make me laugh. And I definitely didn’t expect her to be the one woman I was destined to be with, the missing piece of my soul. My mate. Now what?

A new threat emerges as Chaos, an ancient deity, challenges not only the safety of the sisters but the safety of the world. A decision must be made: Do they save the ones they love or save the world from total destruction? The lines between allies and enemies blur as the danger rises, leaving no one without suspicion. As the worlds of the Fae and human collide the future has never looked so grim - or so damn impossible.

It’s 1958, and Evelyn Elizabeth Grace Murphy has not left the Pinnacle Hotel in fourteen months. She suffers from agoraphobia, and what’s more, it’s her father’s hotel, and everything she needs is there. She’s always been good at finding things. Fifteen years earlier, she discovered her mother dead. Now, she’s finding trouble inside her sanctuary. At a party for artist Billie Bell, his newest work is stolen, and Evelyn’s fake boyfriend, movie star Henry Fox, is accused of the theft. But just as Evelyn sets out to prove Henry’s innocence, she finds Billie Bell dead.

Hazel Davis is drifting: newly unemployed, living in a city she hates, and significantly less successful than her infamous younger sister, Evie. Evie grew up online, having gone viral at age five in a daddy-daughter dance video. Now she’s a megapopular lifestyle influencer. But to Hazel, @evelyn is just Evie, her beloved little sister—and a kid who has been exploited for her entire childhood. So when Evie disappears—in the middle of a live stream, during a brand-sponsored trip to Los Angeles—Hazel knows something is terribly wrong.

I'm a berserker warrior, one of the best in the pack. So, when the alphas send me on a mission, nothing will stop me from tracking our enemies down and bringing them to justice. Then, Hazel runs across my path. A flower in the wilderness, she is young, fragile, and afraid. She's on the run from an evil mage who wants her power for his own.

Once upon a time, two dragons saved the virgin. Being the only virgin on the prison planet isn't so bad. No, actually, it totally sucks. There are two Draekons who are interested in me. Well, I thought they were, but they keep blowing hot and cold. They won’t make a move. It’s infuriating. Whatever. I have no use for broody aliens. None at all. No matter how gorgeous they are. No matter how much my insides tingle when they touch me.

How to fail as an intergalactic spy: 1. Crash spaceship on wrong planet. 2. Break leg. 3. Get abducted by rogue prisoners. 4. End up with two pairs of dragon-shifters claiming I’m their mate. They intend to court me until I choose between them. Secret mission or not, I’m gonna end up with two Draekon mates.

The only daughter of an Irish chieftain has one purpose and one alone: marry well. But on the eve of my wedding, I’m stolen away on a ghostly ship by a warrior trapped in time. Legend tells of a Sea Wolf who must sail the northern seas until he finds the woman who can break his curse and lead him home

Abducted by aliens. Put up for auction. But instead of being sold to the highest bidder, I'm rescued by one of the Ulfarri kings: the biggest, baddest bullies in the universe. Unfortunately, the huge, intimidating warrior makes it clear he wants something in return for saving my life.

It was a simple job: go to a wedding. Execute the groom. Then I saw the bride, wearing a mountain of white satin, her lacy veil now spattered with blood. Instead of running away screaming like the rest of the wedding party, she raised her chin and stared at me, a challenge in her dark eyes. I felt a flicker of feeling in my cold, dark heart...Then she shot me. And I knew...I had to make her mine.

After a thousand years entombed, the Corpse King has broken the witch’s binding and risen again. He’s raised an army and will rule us all unless we fight and stop him. And I'm the one who holds the key to his defeat. The witches have tasked me with this mission, but they don't trust me. They send two Berserkers to be my guides, my protectors, and my guards. Ragnar and Loki are powerful warriors, but if they think I'm a naive innocent they can control, they are very much mistaken. I trust them as little as they trust me, and I am on my guard.

The big, bad alien hero rescued me from the evil Zorahn. He sees to my every need. He sends me thoughtful presents. If someone threatens me, Yafet destroys them. He’s ruthless in his desire to keep me safe. And despite all of that, I can’t get him to take the next step. Kisses? Yes. Heavy petting? Again, yes. Anything more? Nope. He won’t go further even though he obviously wants to.

Top three reasons I should stay away from Danek: 1. He’s on a super-secret, important mission for the Rebellion. He’ll be undercover on a hostile planet, surrounded by people that want to kill him. 2. He’s gorgeous. Entirely unattainable. Way, way out of my league. 3. I’m 40, but I’m supposed to pose as his fake fiancée. 4. And he’s a really, really good actor, because when he kisses me, it feels real. When he wraps his arms around me, I want to stay in his embrace forever. (Okay, fine, that’s four reasons.)

Nearly 100 of the most popular and loved poems in the English language, this collection is one of the most comprehensive anthologies of its kind available. It covers a remarkable range, from the striking vision of Blake and Shelley and the insights of Keats to lighter but equally memorable verse by Tennyson, Donne, and Edward Lear.