Showing results by narrator "Patrick Harris" in All Categories

This compilation of The Darwin Awards books I, II and III commemorate those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it, showing us just how uncommon common sense can be! Meet the absentminded terrorist who opens a mail bomb returned to him for insufficient postage. Marvel at the thief who steals electrical wires before shutting off the current. Gape at the would-be pilot who flies his lawn chair suspended from helium balloons into air-traffic lanes.

The theft of a whetstone from a Welsh museum and the murder of a curate during a grave robbery seem, at first, like random crimes. But the troubling deeds are linked by a precarious thread. An unusual collection of rare and scattered British antiquities has become a target — and the relics' value lies in something much more dangerous than money....

The Change occurred when an electrical storm centered over the island of Nantucket produced a blinding white flash that rendered all electronic devices and fuels inoperable - and plunged the world into a dark age humanity was unprepared to face....Michael Havel was flying over Idaho en route to the holiday home of his passengers when the plane’s engines inexplicably died, forcing a less than perfect landing in the wilderness. And as Michael leads his charges to safety, he begins to realize that the engine failure was not an isolated incident.

The Blood Countess — Elizabeth Bathory, a true monster of history — is one of the most infamous serial killers. Said to have murdered 650 young women for their blood, she believed bathing in it would preserve her vitality and beauty. It's a story that has always fascinated archaeologist and TV host Annja Creed. Something so fantastic could only be a story. So what is Annja to make of the girl she finds dying on the side of the road…from blood loss? 

Rudi Mackenzie has been abducted by the forces of the Portland Protective Association, whose forces have pushed the Bearkillers and Mackenzie’s to the edge of defeat. Will aid arrive in time or will Mike Havel and his family be defeated by Norman Arminger and his mad grab for power? What of the secret plan now afoot between the Mackenzie’s and the forces at Mount Angel? Will the Abbot Dmwoski and his forces be able to break the siege of their monastery in time to come to the aid of Lady Juniper and her Witch Army?

A beautiful woman, a powerful Mexican rancher, and an exotic new breed of cattle come to John Slaughter’s San Bernardino Valley ranch, along with the prospect of making a small fortune. While Slaughter’s men are out keeping the peace in Tombstone, an act of betrayal turns up the heat under his own roof, and a killer is stalking Slaughter’s wealthy Mexican guest. Indians suddenly savagely attack Slaughter’s ranch, but it is only the first shot in a bigger, blazing Arizona bloodbath.

In the tenth year of the Change, the survivors in western Oregon live in a world without technology. Michael Havel’s Bearkillers hold the lands west of Salem in peace and order. To the east, the Clan Mackenzie flourishes under the leadership of Juniper Mackenzie, bard and High Priestess. Together, they have held Norman Arminger - the warlord of Portland - at bay. With his dark fantasies of a neofeudal empire, Arminger rules much of the Pacific Northwest, spreading fear with his knights, castles, and holy inquisition.

Alex has called it quits and stormed off, leaving Harlow alone and vulnerable in the danger zone with little chance of survival and a broken heart. Luckily, Jax finds her and brings her back to the caves. However, little does she know she’s returning with multiple souvenirs. Standing out for all the wrong reasons has become Harlow’s specialty, and as the effects of her vertic switz tattoo set in and new issues are brought to light, she and her friends will find themselves in the line of fire with Rae and Electra.

The latest work from one of America's most important young playwrights and creator of the current hit TV series, "Brothers and Sisters". Financial powerhouse Sandy Sonnenberg finds his personal and professional life threatened by unraveling secrets from his past. A tragic game of financial and moral betrayal plays out over four decades, with an exacting price - family, friends, love and marriage. Starring members of the original Off-Broadway production.

An unplanned murder during a bank robbery has another sheriff on the trail of those on the lam.

Aremis Slake, at the age of thirteen, took his fear and misfortune and hid them underground. The thing is, he had to go with them...

Lou Prophet loves to keep beautiful women company. But when the invitation comes from Miss Louisa Bonaventure, the Vengeance Queen, he finds himself intimate with hot lead instead of her warm female form. Louisa’s got him riding the brutal Mexican frontier chasing outlaws led by Tony Lazzaro, a notorious thief whose deadly weapon, Sugar Delphi, is a blind and blood-hungry pistolera.

The news is bad. The stage driver's wife who is expecting a child has taken a serious fall and now needs her husband. Dave Judd will take his place driving the stagecoach filled with passengers who want to get through before the bitter cold that is lifting becomes a blizzard.

Tom Dallas has changed his way of living. All the shootings in which he was involved were justified, but there are many who want his scalp which prompts him to make a vow that he will not pack bullets in his .45 for a year. Then a situation develops that can only result in breaking his vow.

Matt North's secret plan to force an entire range to reverse its decision to raise sheep.

Matt Hurst seeks justice when a sheriff's posse kills his father and brothers.

About the fascinating Mrs. King, young Rosalia Dures, and the strong, silent Tom Folliard. A story in which bullets supply the answer after all other ways fail.

The Lord Protector of Portland has continued to press his rule into every corner of the Willamette. Both Juniper and Havel know that war is coming, but their allies in the Free-state of Corvallis are less convinced. Sir Nigel continues his escape from mad King Charles with the aid of his new found Tasmanian allies, having to out race the legendary sailing ship the Cutty Sark and battle pirates off the coast of Africa.

Ruby was murdered on Earth 18 years ago and reincarnated on Zadok as a Pastel Zeek named Harlow. To be born at the bottom of her race’s caste colour system to a middle-class family of Magentas has made Harlow a source of conflict amongst the ruling Purples, and a source of derision from all three colours.

This is a story about a lump of coal who can think, talk, and move itself around. Is there a more charming holiday tale to behold? Probably, but Lemony Snicket has not written one...