Showing results by publisher "----RM Alexander" in Humorous

Churchill is Prime Minister for the last time. Rationing is still in force. All music sounds like the BBC Radiophonic Workshop. People like living in 1952: it's familiar and reassuring, and Britain knows its place in the world. Few have noticed it's been 1952 for the past 65 years. Meet Professor Quanderhorn; a brilliant, maverick scientific genius who has absolutely no moral compass. With his Dangerous Giant Space Laser, High Rise Farm, Invisible Robot and Fleet of Monkey-driven Lorries, he's not afraid to push the boundaries of science to their very limit.

Aliens ripped a hole above Earth, arriving with a massive space station. I sorta figured we'd be enslaved to fight in their wars or exterminated for our resources. Nope. The hip-high Iglax were merchants with ugly squished faces and thick blue fur. While they weren't much to look at, they sure did have some wonderous technology.

Meet Phluttr - a diabolically addictive new social network and a villainess, heroine, enemy, and/or bestie to millions. Phluttr has ingested every fact and message ever sent to, from, and about her innumerable users. Her capabilities astound her makers - and they don't even know the tenth of it. But what's the purpose of this stunning creation? Is it a front for something even darker and more powerful than the NSA?

Vance Turbo, Hero of Space, has spent most of his hard-won officer's career helping refugees. This ends when a star gets blown up and he accidentally ends up saving everyone. Now the captain of the E.S.S Ares, he is on a goodwill mission to Contested Space. Unfortunately, his crew is made up of people who couldn't qualify for Space Academy but are now in thanks to lowered enlistment standards.

Demeter just wants to do her job: shuttling humans between Earth and Alpha Centauri. Unfortunately, her passengers keep dying—and not from equipment failures, as her AI medical system, Steward, would have her believe. These are paranormal murders, and they began when one nasty, ancient vampire decided to board Demeter and kill all her humans. To keep from getting decommissioned, Demeter must join forces with her own team of monsters. Together, this motley crew will face down the ultimate evil—Dracula.

Plucked from time, Sir Thomas More arrives on the human colony of Astrobe in the year AD 2535, where there is trouble in utopia: Can he and his motley followers save this golden world from the Programmed Persons, and the soulless perfection they have engineered? The survival of faith itself is at stake in this thrilling, uncategorizable, wildly inventive first novel - but the adventure is more than one of ideas. As astonishingly as Philip K. Dick and other visionaries of the 1960s new wave, Lafferty turns the conventions of space-opera science fiction upside down and inside out.

When the dead rose, Ryan Maxwell planned on waiting the apocalypse out in the massive Bunker he built after winning the lottery. In the eight months since Z-Day the Maxwell family and their friends have not only NOT stayed hidden away, they have searched the country for loved ones and taken hundreds into their safe Haven. The discovery of electromagnetic "ghosts" directing some of the undead changed the apocalypse landscape beyond anyone's imagination. But the further discovery of science that can possibly eliminate that threat may lead them down a more dangerous path.

A space-faring ne’er-do-well with more bravado than brains, Rex Nihilo plies the known universe in a tireless quest for his own personal gain. But when he fleeces a wealthy weapons dealer in a high-stakes poker game, he ends up winning a worthless planet…and owing an outstanding debt more vast than space itself!

Monkey Business, book 10: Bob was looking forward to settling in and peddling walnuts for a few days...until a slip of the tongue sent him racing to save the old Commonwealth Navy fleet. Just when things were looking like he could head home to Nikki, and get a couple of days off, he’s called out on a rescue mission. Join the fun, as Bob takes the long way home. Let's Make a Deal, book 11: Bob finally gets his wish: a chance to make peace with the Squirrels.

Intergalactic lawman Terry Victor is betrayed by fellow officers and sent to a backwater planet on the interstellar arm of the universe. In short, he was sent to the planet called Earth. Fed up, he quits in a fit of disgust and seeks a peaceful retirement among the humans. Unfortunately, trouble has a way of finding Terry Victor. Keep his head down and away from Earth's authorities, or help a woman about to be attacked by a gang?

The thing about Artem... It's a damn hard city to live in if you haven't got creds, and for creds, you need opportunities. The thing about opportunities... They're thin on the ground for Orcs, one of the most reviled races in the sprawling city. If you happen to be an Orc left for dead on the frontlines of Artem's roving monster problem and stranded outside its immense city walls, then you're doubly screwed—like Oshbob. The thing about Oshbob... He's tough, and he's pissed! With a will to survive like few others, he's determined never to be subject to the whims of the elite ever again.

Getting to the moon was Chris's lifelong dream. He had the brains, body, and boldness to do it—that is, until he lost his legs in a motorcycle accident. Even then, the universe found a way to make that happen when a private tech company offered him his shot at lunar glory—that is, until his ship exploded after liftoff. Suddenly, somehow, Chris finds himself transported to a new world—and a new body. A goblin body. No . . . a goblin king body!

Nacho had zero intentions to make friends. He certainly had no plans to be put in the unenviable position of being the leader of a guild. But if there’s one thing that he excels at, it certainly isn’t cooking. No, he’s far better at rolling with the punches and making sure the people around him survive. When literal monsters are everywhere, that’s the kind of person you want in charge. But this world isn’t what he’s been expecting. Things are different. He is different. By succeeding so much, so fast, humanity has unlocked the next stage of the Juxtaposition, years before they’re ready for it.

When Darren’s charge-cart gets knocked off the Earth-to-Mars highway and lost in space forever, he thinks his day can’t get any worse. When Kelly sees Darren accidentally short-circuit a talking lamppost, and its camera captures her face as it expires, she thinks her day can’t get any worse. When Pamasonic Teffal, a sentient breadmaker, is sent on a top-secret mission into the depths of the Internet and betrayed by her boss, a power-crazed smartphone, she knows this is only the beginning of a day that isn’t going to get any better. Join Darren, Kelly, and Pam in an anarchic comic adventure.

Cantankerous bachelor Robin Lightfoot is happily single - until one morning he awakes to discover he’s married with two children. And he has two half-brothers...both called Ian. Is it a nightmare, a practical joke or something more sinister? Robin gradually realises that he’s in an alternate universe, where the Lib Dems are in power, the Dimbleby brothers are sports commentators and alcohol is a class-A drug.

The former space janitor returns to her mother's estate on Kaku to plan her wedding. Or, as she soon discovers, to be ignored while the SK'Corp public relations machine plans the event of the galaxy. Overruled at every turn and stalked by CelebVid--a viral video outlet--Triana does what she does best and goes underground. When she befriends the son of a deposed dictator, everything goes sideways. On the run from rogue secret police, things start to get sticky--Space Janitor style. Will Triana escape and figure out what the heck is going on? Of course she will! She might even save the day.

It’s been seven days since the demons invaded; seven days since they set the world on fire and put humanity on a fast track to extinction. Now, the girls and I are shooting across a war-torn landscape in our Black Hawk, headed for what’s left of Reston, Virginia. Our mission: Retrieve vital intel buried somewhere deep behind enemy lines - intel we’re going to use for one hell of a world-wide counterattack.

Rostislav Grokhotov, an ordinary clerk working for a privately-owned company, just wanted to earn some extra money in the game. He had no specific plans for his new character. Little did he know that his new nickname Rosgard would become the game's next greatest legend. Even the game's Creche zone may contain items of interest if you're observant enough. Rosgard's find didn't just change his own life drastically - it enveloped an entire game world in turmoil to boot! The adventuring player becomes a valued prize for Waldyra's leading clans. Our hero has to conceal his real name.

Accidental space adventurer Cal Carver has had a rough few months. He's fought spider-dragons, battled space clowns, and been repeatedly tortured by the galaxy's oldest assassin. And don't even get him started on the squirrel-tits. Now all that's behind him, Cal just wants to kick back and relax. The universe, however, has other ideas. He and his crew find themselves in possession of the Symmorium Sentience, a once god-like entity now stripped of its power.

Modern technology is terrifying. The average smartphone carries out 3.36 billion instructions per second. The average person can carry out only one instruction in that time. Stop and think about that for a second. Sorry, that's two instructions; you won't be able to do that. But what if modern technology was... literally terrifying? What if there really was a ghost in the machine? Prepare to travel through the bad gateway as acclaimed actor, writer and comedian Tom Neenan (The Mash Report) finds out what horrors may be lurking in our apps and gadgets.