Showing results by publisher "----RM Alexander" in Humorous

Meet Olivia, a savvy personal shopper with a knack for avoiding commitment and a dreaded annual party to dodge. Her mother's swanky New Year's Eve bash is as unavoidable as her parents' questions about her personal life. Enter Ruune, a charming alien prince with a reputation for loving and leaving across the galaxy. His arrival in New York could cause issues for the Valorian's new treaty with Earth, especially if he starts breaking hearts.

Eli "Nacho" Naches is a fearsome assassin who has lost everything in a post-apocalyptic world full of monstrous creatures. He knows where he fits in this horror show, and he’s only been hanging around to see what’s going to be thrown at him next. When he’s finally put in chains and sent to the chopping block, he goes readily...only to be unexpectedly sent back in time to his younger body with his memories intact and the chance to make a difference.

There has never been a mage this powerful before. And yet, what use is power when bad things happen while you sleep? For most people, the question is: "How do I go on?" For Bud, the question is: "How do I fix this?" The problem is determining why it broke, so it won't happen again. But fixing things is easy. It's the consequences of your choices which are difficult. And what of the other things which need fixing? Once you start fixing things, where does it end? He's worked for Kali, Ganesha, and Shiva, across two galaxies. Now, he's Destiny's Spacemage.

Hunting pirates is hard…especially when your only assets are an unarmed ship, two ex-naval officers, a makeup artist, and a couple of pistols. But that’s exactly what Brad Mendoza and Jessica Lin have signed up to do on the edge of the Fringe: to help a bunch of farmers on a dead-end planet fight the pirate threat! Quickly, they find that they really don’t know what they’re doing…and not everything is what it seems.

Jakes back. He's older, wiser, and better dressed. He's going to be the coolest spy ever, then he fails his pilot exam. Disgraced, Dashi sends him out hunting missing food shipments. It's boring, but Nadine's shadowing him. Is it to find out what he knows, or just to snoop on that slinky redhead free trader pilot he took to dinner?

Me and Fanger been holed up out in the country recovering from the fight. We could handle pretty much all them critters except for them Maybelle Turner werewolves. Fanger got drunk one night and his strategic mind kicked in to action. He came up with a four-step plan for figuring out these alien critters. Phase one was to requisition some silver to make some bullets. Phase two was surveillance and recon. Phase three was stockpile more of that black ooze to keep ourselves invisible.

Bob Johansson recién vendió su compañía de software por una pequeña fortuna y le ilusiona vivir la vida en grande. Lo primero en su lista de pendientes: gastar su nuevo dinero. En un derroche, contrata un servicio para preservar su cabeza en criogenia, en caso de muerte. Momentos después, pierde la vida al cruzar una calle. Al despertar, 117 años después, Bob descubre que su mente ha sido cargada a una sonda espacial inteligente, con la habilidad de replicarse a sí misma.

The corporations promised it could never happen. Of course they would say that. Their products were everywhere. They had turned everything from scarecrows to coffee makers into robots, and there wasn't a home on Earth that wasn't filled with their machines. The League for the Preservation of Humans said it was inevitable. It wouldn't be much of a league otherwise. If they gave up their cause, there'd be no need for the rallies, or the fundraisers, or the galas. And who would they feel superior to if they didn't get to lecture everyone?

We always knew in the back of our minds that we'd have to use them on our own world if we were to save it, but I still can't get around the fact we vaporized D.C. to keep the demons at bay. Every day that passes sees humanity more and more on the brink of obliteration. That said, we've managed to secure some intel that gives us a glimmer of hope when it comes to our species' survival. In short, we've got the opportunity to get behind enemy lines—as in, off the planet—and sow chaos amongst their ranks. And from there, who knows?

Fifty-something Shona McMonagle is a proud former pupil of the Marcia Blaine School for Girls, but has a deep loathing for The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie, which she thinks gives her alma mater a bad name. Impeccably educated and an accomplished martial artist, linguist and musician, Shona is thrilled when selected by Marcia Blaine herself to travel back in time for a one-week mission in 19th-century Russia: to pair up the beautiful, shy, orphaned heiress Lidia Ivanovna with Sasha, a handsome young man of unexplained origins — and all in a gorgeously Tolstoyan setting.

Under arrest for crimes he hasn't yet committed, interstellar con man is given one chance to earn his freedom: he and his long-suffering robot sidekick Sasha must track down six fugitive androids who are determined to assassinate the Malarchian Primate!

Tomorrow, the funk descends on Manhattan, a noxious cloud that separates the island from the rest of the world and mutates the population. Some generations on, the surviving population exists amid the rubble of modernity, wearing our cast-off clothing, worshipping celebrities as dim gods, and using emojis in place of written language. The Island exists in a state of uneasy peace, with each neighborhood an independent fiefdom, protecting itself with scrap metal spears and Molotov cocktails.

Billy Bane is a prophet who got it all wrong, and the galaxy has been burning ever since. All he wants is to waste away in the darkest corner of space with his best pal Dust, a supercharged Fuq bot. But when a new prophet comes calling, Billy is summoned to save the galaxy he's at least partially responsible for destroying. Too bad he couldn't care less.

Welcome to Dhaka, Bangladesh in 2089. A city notorious for its extreme population density has found an unexpected way to not just survive a global climate apocalypse, but thrive: pump enough biological nanotech into the neighborhood and all of the bodies together form a self-sustaining, and even temperate, microclimate. Certain people no longer need food or water, while others can live without functioning organs. So the mercenary Djibrel has to carry a machete wherever he goes. What Djibrel doesn’t know is that his every move is being tracked by the infamous Cyber Mage.

When interstellar con man Rex Nihilo and his quick-witted robot sidekick, Sasha, land on the dusty frontier planet of Tierra Grande, they’re expecting an easy job: track down their friend, bounty hunter Pepper Melange, and maybe make a quick buck on the side. But things take a wild turn when Rex and Sasha accidentally take out a group of local troublemakers in the ramshackle town of Last Chance. What starts as a simple rescue mission spirals into a chaotic adventure of shootouts, shenanigans, and shadowy conspiracies.

At age 10, Jenni Farrow and her new best friend, Timmy Caruso, enjoy a glorious summer on Pearl Island filled with fireworks, beach days, and carnival rides (not to mention that strange sea creature they rescue from a tide pool). Then, one late summer day, Timmy disappears. Thirty years later, Jenni—now Jenn Lanaro, best-selling author of the Philipia Bay action-romance series—is desperate to escape the fatigue of her career and her soon-to-be-ex-husband.

Fred Cassidy leads an idyllic life. As long as he remains a full time college student without a degree, he is provided a very generous stipend from his uncle's estate. But after thirteen years of happy undergrad existence everything is about to change. Cassidy's home is broken into and ransacked. When he enters he is assaulted by a former professor wanting to know where the alien artifact known as the star stone is. Cassidy manages to escape, only to discover that he is also being pursued by hired criminals, Anglophile zealots, government agents, and aliens.

Triana Moore, maintenance bot technician on Station Kelly-Kornienko, prefers life in orbit where the air is purified, the commute is short, and nature doesn’t get all over you. But when a minor infraction gets her sent to remedial training dirtside, she doesn’t complain. Who wouldn’t enjoy a few days of sitting in the sunshine, eating gourmet burgers, and drinking too much Jager Hula?

Through strange metaphysical circumstances, failed screenwriter Brad Cohen finds himself caught in an infinite time loop, forced to relive the first forty years of his life again and again. Each "repeat," Brad wakes up in the womb on what was supposed to be his fortieth birthday, with full knowledge of what's come before. In various timelines, he becomes a successful political pundit, a game-show champion, a playboy, and a master manipulator of the stock market, but none of them seems to lead him out of his predicament.

The Library's operations are expanding. Patrons come and go. Fines levied, books returned. But some dangerous books have been wiped from the system, and only surveillance helps reveal what they are. With some of these books integral to dimensional stability, they have to be retrieved no matter what. Quinn must enlist the help of her assistants and allies to perform rituals capable of locating these books. Some of the information comes too easily, hinting at deception behind every turn. They must navigate the trails before the traps snap shut!