Showing results by publisher "-emdashery books-" in Humorous

A year after fleeing an abusive partner, Farah's welcome in the refuge sheltering her is ending. With no money, no job, and no options, she's floored to be presented with a marriage of convenience to an alien behemoth as a solution. Considering her recent ordeal, entering a relationship with a four-armed giant with herculean strength is the last thing she wants. But the sweet, respectful, and cuddly male she discovers behind that intimidating façade makes her feel safer than she has in years.

There has never been a mage this powerful before. And yet, what use is power when bad things happen while you sleep? For most people, the question is: "How do I go on?" For Bud, the question is: "How do I fix this?" The problem is determining why it broke, so it won't happen again. But fixing things is easy. It's the consequences of your choices which are difficult. And what of the other things which need fixing? Once you start fixing things, where does it end? He's worked for Kali, Ganesha, and Shiva, across two galaxies. Now, he's Destiny's Spacemage.

High Protector Vance Turbo managed to save the entire galaxy and retrieve his wayward child, Astrid. As such, he's been looking for a safe job to raise his daughter and find some peace. Unfortunately, that turns out to have been a terrible idea because while Vance believes the universe doesn't need him, the universe disagrees. Sent on a crazy mission to assassinate a Sorkanan warlord and recover a long-lost space pirate treasure, Vance discovers that humanity is on the chopping block for its many sins.

To save the shelter, Sergey travels to an unknown planet that has suffered the same fate as Earth. But things don't exactly go according to plan . . . and the situation on Earth has gone from bad to worse!

Bob did the neighborly thing and helped out some folks with a problem. You know it can't be that easy, right? Things get a little sporty when it comes to how people want to reward him for his actions. Come see how Bob deals with notoriety.

It's spring break and Max is stuck at home all by himself. Just the way he likes it. He games online, feasts on junk, and wonders why his cat can suddenly talk. Thanks to a bizarre mishap, Max has started shifting between parallel universes whenever he falls asleep. A curious affliction, and one that steadily erodes his sanity. Day after day, he awakes to a strange new reality and struggles to make sense of his surroundings.

When Ophelia seeks the services of the Prime Mating Agency to find her soulmate, she’s floored to learn that her perfect match is Gaelec, an intimidating, feline-looking ex-convict. Despite her better judgment, she agrees to the union only to discover that a sweet and cuddly male, with the fluffiest fur, hides behind the stern but sexy mountain of muscle that is her new husband.

Es hätte so ein schöner Tag werden können - bis Arthur Dent feststellt, dass sein Haus abgerissen werden soll. Macht aber eigentlich nichts, weil kurz darauf auch die Erde gesprengt wird, um einer Hyperraum-Umgehungsstraße Platz zu machen. Diesem Schicksal kann Dent gerade noch entgehen – dank seines außerirdischen Freundes Ford Prefect und des intergalaktischen Weltreiseführers. Vom Babelfisch bis zu den Vogonen, vom Pangalaktischen Donnergurgler bis zur drittschlechtesten Dichtkunst des Universums.

John, Chris, and Erik are neighbors in the quaint subdivision of the Creeks of Sage Valley, Phase II. The three men happily live the typical suburban family life. Their only real problems have been with each other and the draconian rules of the HOA. But, all that changes when the dead rise from their graves and walk the Earth.

The BSR crew have worked hard, getting the Slow Boatmen settled. They deserve a little time off at home in the Holler. Just kicking back, watching the world go by. Their shepherd has other ideas, of course.

"Seth the Destroyer" is more than just his stage name; it's how he approaches his bounties too! And with death and chaos around every corner, Seth and the Moonsault Professional Wrestling league are going to need every skill they can bring to bear when the hunters become the hunted.

When an alien spacecraft crashes near a university, two average student-athletes, Bill and Greg, survive a freak accident—only to discover that their bodies now host nanites designed for healing. Instead, the nanites elevate their intelligence, accelerate their recovery abilities, and make them targets in a global game of power, surveillance, and secrets. Determined to use their abilities for good, they begin developing world-changing technologies: clean energy systems, self-sustaining infrastructure, and tools designed to empower the forgotten corners of the world.

Clunk, a clapped-out robot, is convinced he's about to be junked. Instead, his penny-pinching boss is sending him off to be refurbished. Being old and wise, Clunk knows there's a catch, but at first it doesn't seem too bad. He just has to help a freelancer pick up some cargo. Unfortunately, Hal Spacejock - the freelancer - is obstinate, over-confident, and woefully under-skilled, and he's never going to let a lowly robot fly his precious ship.

Neal Gordon screwed up his assignment on Mars and they reassigned him to Antarctica. Now he's being reassigned some place even worse: Luna City. A crime ridden hellhole with a super-rich ruling class, he almost immediately finds himself targeted by bounty hunters and cyborg terrorists. Thankfully, Neal has an unusual set of partners in robot dog, Barksley, and the snarky but badass Lucy Westenra. Yes, make all the vampire jokes you want.

After as much as the company has practiced bugging out, you wouldn't think that loading up a few hundred folks and their belongings would be that tough, would you? Well, if that's what you think, you haven't met our shepherd. Tag along and see how they come up with solutions to problems they didn't even know they had.

Sick of the stress, aggravation, and multiple genocides they've had to put up with lately, accidental space hero Cal Carver and his crew set off to start a new life in a distant corner of the galaxy. Six tedious days of warp-speed and board games later, they arrive in a sector filled with new hope, new opportunities, and new adventures. Too broke to take advantage of any of these things, they are forced to accept a series of increasingly demeaning jobs just to make ends meet.

Captain Sloan did something he shouldn't have. Now, he has to make amends. That turns out to be more of a job than anyone would have thought. Watch him and the crew of the Armstrong as they work to make things right. Bob thought they had the Boatmen safe from the cats and in places where they could live peacefully. Turns out the cats have a purpose, and the fleet made a mistake. Little Becky gets hurt finding that out.

Mitch's mediocre life has just taken a turn for the worse, so his buddy tries to cheer him up by showing him a secret starship. Unfortunately, everything goes south when hostile aliens arrive. In an effort to save his buddy and the starship from the aliens, Mitch does the obvious thing: he accidentally warps hundreds of light-years away. Marooned in a distant star cluster, Mitch is forced to deal with a snarky teenage AI, a rogue auto-pilot, and a beautiful alien soldier who's ready to steal his ship at any moment—so she can fight an oppressive military faction, of course.

Fool's Play is the first book in a new series in the System Apocalypse universe. Written by David R. Packer in Tao Wong's bestselling post-apocalyptic LitRPG universe, System Apocalypse: Kismet follows a different path through a post-apocalyptic world, one of hope, redemption, and second chances.

Eighteen-year-old Martin Kilborne is a mundane human and self-made supervillain. Armed with his late uncle's beat-up van and a talent for swindling and forgery, he infiltrates the Omnithean Superstate. Posing as grieving, orphaned, half-blood student Alexander Glock, he scams his way into Skyfall Academy—an elite school filled with privileged cryptids—on a quest for vengeance.