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Have you ever completely lost your cool with your kid and then spent the next hour feeling like the worst parent alive? Family therapist and author of The Perfect Parent Trap, Lisa Taylor, has spent 25 years sitting across from families in crisis — and what she'll tell you is that in almost every single case, the child is not the problem. In this deeply honest conversation, Danielle and Lisa get into the real reason the teenage years can feel less like raising a family and more like surviving one, and what you can do about it.

Lisa introduces her concept of "Heartprints" — the invisible imprints from our own childhood that quietly drive our reactions under stress. When your teenager slams a door or goes into full shutdown, the heat you feel rising in your chest? That's rarely about them. This conversation is warm, practical, and full of the kind of insights that will make you stop mid-scroll and think: oh, that's me.

In this episode:

• 0:00 Introduction
• 4:30 Why parenting feels unsolvable
• 9:00 Behaviour is information, not a problem to fix
• 12:00 What's happening in your teenager's brain
• 17:00 Heartprints: how your childhood drives your reactions
• 24:00 Does the inner work ever end?
• 29:00 When your kid completely shuts down
• 34:30 Parenting from fear vs love
• 39:00 Why taking things away doesn't work
• 43:30 Screens and the technology experiment
• 49:00 Spicy brains, blended families and unmet needs
• 53:00 Protecting your relationship through the teen years
• 57:00 Why repair is more powerful than perfection
• 1:01:00 The five fundamentals
• 1:04:30 Danielle's thinking points

Resources mentioned: The Perfect Parent Trap by Lisa Taylor — available at Amber Press, Amazon, Booktopia and good bookstores

Lisa's website: strengtheningfamiliesaustralia.com.au

Lisa on Instagram: @lisataylor.au

Connect with Danielle:

daniellecolley.com.au

bigstuffpod@gmail.com

IG- @iamdaniellecolley