Velvet Al wrote some new stuff during the brief time he was a regular at Cafe Aroma's open mic night. Hear him read "Tearjerker," "Baby Got Rack," "Cocksuckers," "I Got Diarrhea The Day We Were Supposed To Have A Threeway," "Fuck Zuck," "Son Of A Milf," "Wet Dream," "What You Could Have Had," "Getting Trolled," "It Wasn't Me," and "Pocket Pussy."

Part 4 of the audiobook version of my classic (unpublished) novel, "I Sold My Soul To Satan And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt," about a loser teen who turns to the Dark Lord for help in winning over his dream girl. Things don't go so well and hilarity ensues!

Part 3 of the audiobook version of my classic (unpublished) novel, "I Sold My Soul To Satan And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt," about a loser teen who turns to the Dark Lord for help in winning over his dream girl. Things don't go so well and hilarity ensues!

Part 2 of the audiobook version of my classic (unpublished) novel, "I Sold My Soul To Satan And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt," about a loser teen who turns to the Dark Lord for help in winning over his dream girl. Things don't go so well and hilarity ensues!

Part 1 of the audiobook version of my classic (unpublished) novel, "I Sold My Soul To Satan And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt," about a loser teen who turns to the Dark Lord for help in winning over his dream girl. Things don't go so well and hilarity ensues!

Velvet Al does a nearly 20 minute version of "Predator." Plus half assed renderings of "Elephants" and "I'll Show You Mine If You Show Me Yours."

More attempts by Velvet Al to be serious. Pieces read: "Look At You, Now You're Crying," "Val's Story, Part One," and "Memento Mori."

Learn the true meaning of X-Mas.