If you're dealing with a desire discrepancy, you probably think you know what you want: more sex, or less sex. But what I've learned is this: there's always more under the surface. And that information is gold for figuring out the way forward together.

If you're the higher-desire partner, what are you actually seeking when you want sex? Is it validation? Connection? Reassurance that the relationship is okay? If you're the lower-desire partner, what are you really trying to avoid when you don't want sex? Certain sensations? Emotions? Pressure? Memories?

When you dig deeper and get honest answers to these questions, everything shifts. You can communicate what you actually need, you stop putting invisible pressure on your partner, and you find other ways to meet your real needs.

This episode walks both partners through the questions you need to ask yourselves—with curiosity, not judgment. Plus: how to stop asking yourself crappy questions that make you feel worse, and start asking empowering ones instead.

Your brain will answer whatever you ask it. Let's ask better questions.

Check out Emily Nagoski's latest book here: Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections

🎙️ THE DESIRE GAP BRIDGE™ PROGRAM IS OPEN

10 spots through March 4th. Body-based, guaranteed coaching for desire gaps—for couples and individuals who've tried everything and are ready for real change. No blame, no shame.

Enroll by March 4th and receive 4 curated lesser-known books for desire discrepancy situations— the ones that actually move the needle.

Book a free consultation: https://laurajurgens.com/bridge

Get my free guide: 5 Steps to Start Solving Desire Differences
(Without Blame or Shame), A Practical Starting Point for Individuals and Couples, at https://laurajurgens.com/libido

Find out more about my offerings and read the blog: https://laurajurgens.com/