In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington is joined by somatic sexuality educator and facilitator Shadi Terra for a nuanced conversation about erotic power, embodiment, trauma-informed kink, and what it means to practice liberation through the body.

Together, they explore how kink, tantra, and somatic work can be pathways to healing rather than harm when practiced with consent, self-awareness, and nervous system literacy. Shadi shares insights on erotic choice, power dynamics, and how reclaiming pleasure can be a radical act, especially for marginalized bodies and identities.

This episode invites listeners to move beyond performative sexuality and into deeper truth, presence, and self-trust in their erotic lives.

• Kink and tantra as tools for embodiment and healing

• Erotic power vs. coercion and unconscious reenactment

• Trauma-informed approaches to sexuality and BDSM

• Consent as an ongoing, embodied practice, not a checkbox

• The role of nervous system awareness in erotic exploration

• Reclaiming pleasure as a form of liberation

• Why slowing down creates more safety and depth

• Honoring choice, agency, and erotic authenticity

Shadi Terra is a Shamanic Kink teacher and practitioner, sex and relationship educator, and transformational ritual facilitator. They support humans of all gender identities, ethnicities, and sexual orientations to stand in their power and claim their unique gifts.

Over the past 12 years, Shadi has trained extensively in shamanism, sacred sexuality, conscious kink, nonviolent communication, and ritual. They have worked with ceremonial cacao as an ally for spiritual and emotional processing, taught by Keith Wilson, and are a faculty apprentice at the International School of Temple Arts, where they have studied since 2016.

Shadi has studied Mayan cosmology with Tz'utujil elder Francisco Puac and is a devotional song carrier and shamanic voice channel. They identify as gender nonconforming, with a sexual expression that is largely kinky and ecosexual, and are deeply devoted to conscious, shamanic, and therapeutic BDSM as both an erotic and healing art form.

• Workshops and teachings online https://www.terraviva.love/

• International School of Temple Arts (ISTA) https://ista.life/

• https://www.shamanickink.com/

• https://www.instagram.com/shadi_terra/

Website: poly-coach.com
Instagram: @polycoaching

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington sits down with renowned relationship researcher Alison Armstrong for a powerful conversation about understanding differences between men and women and relating with clarity instead of conflict.

Alison shares insights from over three decades of research, including her groundbreaking concept that men live with an "ever presence of death" while women live with an "ever presence of life." Together, they explore how these differences shape communication, intimacy, safety, and partnership across monogamous, open, and polyamorous relationships.

This conversation offers practical tools for listening differently, verifying instead of assuming, honoring yourself first, and creating connection without punishment or self-abandonment.

Alison's Gift for the Poly Tantra Kink Listeners

As a special gift for listeners, Alison is offering her Making Sense of Men eBook for free.

Making Sense of Men eBook (free with promo code)
https://www.alisonarmstrong.com/products/makingsense.html
Select "FOR ME" at checkout and use promo code AlisonGift2025
(Promo code expires 6/30/2026)

• The "ever presence of death" in men and how it shapes behavior
• Women's connection to life, safety, and the eternal
• Why honoring yourself first is essential in relationships
• How assumptions create conflict and verification creates understanding
• Listening with different questions to transform connection
• Why Alison stopped coaching couples
• Understanding differences without making anyone wrong
• How curiosity replaces punishment in healthy partnerships

Alison Armstrong is a relationship researcher, author, and educator who has spent over 30 years studying human behavior to understand what brings out the best in men and women. Her work illuminates instinctive patterns that often undermine love and connection and offers practical, partnership-based alternatives.

Through her books, seminars, live events, and extensive online programs, Alison has helped millions of people create more fulfilling relationships, stronger families, and empowered lives. Her teachings are widely referenced by therapists, coaches, and educators around the world.

• Alison Armstrong: https://www.alisonarmstrong.com

• The Queen's Code (audiobook):
  https://www.alisonarmstrong.com/products/queenscodebook.html

• Understanding Men program:
  https://www.alisonarmstrong.com/curriculum/und/um_details.html

• Understanding Women program:
  https://www.alisonarmstrong.com/curriculum/und/uw_details.html

• LUX program:
  https://www.alisonarmstrong.com/lux/

Alison Armstrong Online:

• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/PAXPrograms

• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/UnderstandMen

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/TheAlisonArmstrong

Website: poly-coach.com
Instagram: @polycoaching

If this conversation stayed with you, notice where similar patterns show up in your own relationships — personal or professional.
Awareness doesn't fix everything, but it often changes what's possible.

For support navigating complex relationship dynamics with nervous-system awareness, visit poly-coach.com.

#RelationshipPodcast
#UnderstandingMen
#UnderstandingWomen
#HealthyRelationships
#RelationalPatterns
#ConsciousRelationships

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie talks with sex educator and consent pioneer Reid Mihalko about navigating group social sexual spaces with more confidence and care. They explore how to prepare for play parties and retreats, understand different party cultures, and have clearer safer sex conversations.

Reid shares practical tools for staying grounded, finding the right community for your nervous system, and using humor and consent to create connection instead of pressure. This episode is for anyone curious about or already exploring group erotic spaces.

• Preparing for play parties and group spaces
• Understanding different play party cultures
• Consent practices and welcome circles
• Safer sex conversations that build trust
• Staying grounded in high-energy environments
• Humor as a tool for easing awkwardness
• Aftercare and integration after events
• The Embrace the Awkward approach to initiation

As seen on NETFLIX' "Chelsea Does..." alongside Chelsea Handler, Reid Mihalko (he/him) of ReidAboutSex.com is an internationally known sex and relationship geek who threw an orgy for Oprah's OWN Network on Lisa Ling's "Our America." He has led thousands of workshops and play parties, and his work has been covered by media outlets across 7 continents. His charisma and easy to understand, pragmatic advice has helped people at virtual and in-person events. His workshops and college lectures have been attended by over 60,000 people from across the globe.

Reid would also like you to know that, in early 2018, some very brave people came forward during #MeToo sharing harms that Reid had caused them. Reid stepped down from teaching and initiated a transformative justice-based accountability process to address his misconduct and make amends if and where possible. The formal, year-long process along with Reid's apology and resources were shared publicly and can be found at TinyURL.com/reidaccountability.

Follow @ReidAboutSex on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube.

• Reid Mihalko's Play Party Resources: https://www.reidaboutsex.com/playparty

• Sex Geek Summer Camp

• Consent and communication education by Reid Mihalko

Website: poly-coach.com
Instagram: @polycoaching

Work with Laurie: Explore coaching for polyamory, open relationships, tantra, sacred sexuality, and conscious kink.