In this episode, we read a letter from a listener who has spent her life being criticised by her mother — called “stupid,” shamed about her body, and told she was a mistake. When she shared the news of her engagement, her mother ignored her for a week. When she tried to express how hurt she felt, she was accused of “looking for trouble” and acting as if she thought she was better than everyone else.

She’s now considering taking a break from the relationship and is asking a question many adult children quietly carry: Is it okay to step back, even when it’s your mother?
We explore what chronic criticism does to the nervous system, why attempts at repair often get turned back on the child, and how to think about distance or no contact in a way that centres safety, self-trust, and emotional reality — not guilt or obligation.

This episode is for anyone navigating the painful space between longing for a different parent and choosing themselves anyway.

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Katie McKenna

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BEYOND SURVIVAL - The Therapy Podcast