Coercive Control While Separated Under One Roof: How to Survive It | The Divorce Course Podcast (Part 2)

🎧 LISTEN IF YOU…

• Are separated but still stuck under one roof

• Were told you "can't leave" without a parenting plan

• Suspect you're being watched through cameras, phone or car

• Are scared to move money or make a move

• Want to plan a safe exit and set real boundaries

⚠️ General education only — not legal or psychological advice. Discusses coercive control, financial & tech abuse. In danger, call 000. Support: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732), Lifeline 13 11 14.

Part 2 of our six-part coercive control series with clinical psychologist Krasi Kirova and Family Law Specialist Lyn Galvin, all about surviving it while you're still in it.

00:00 – Separated but Stuck Under One Roof: You're Not Alone

01:00 – Six-Part Series, Guest Krasi Kirova & How to Send Questions

02:00 – Meet Krasi Kirova & Lyn Galvin

03:00 – Legal & Family Violence Disclaimer

04:00 – Does Coercive Control Continue After Separation? (Sally's Question)

05:00 – The Three Ds: Disrespect, Disempowerment, Distortion

06:00 – Why They Won't Move Out — The New Under-One-Roof Tactic

07:00 – Is Separation Under One Roof Required? Davis & Davis (Sarah's Question)

08:00 – "Can You Make Them Leave?" + When Your Ex Makes Up the Law

10:00 – DARVO Explained + Why Placating Doesn't Work (Nini's Question)

12:00 – How to Prove Escalating Abuse + Judges Are Trained

13:00 – Chronologies as Evidence + The Three-Year "Separation" Trap (Anonymous)

15:00 – The Stuck Feeling Is Entrapment — You Can Leave Without a Plan

17:00 – Cameras, Doorbells & Surveillance In Your Own Home (Loans' Question)

19:00 – Tech-Facilitated Abuse: 70% Is Everyday Tech + The Omnipresence Effect

20:00 – Is My Car Being Tracked? AirTags, Apps & What to Do (Marie's Question)

22:00 – Removing Tech Safely: Order Matters, Sweepers & Bluetooth

24:00 – When Your Ex Uses the Kids to Spy (She Bear's Question)

26:00 – Talking to Your Child About Privacy + Family Reports

28:00 – Krasi's Call-Out: Share Your Voice for the Psychology Conference

31:00 – Moving Money Without Awakening the Bear (JT's Question)

33:00 – Getting Your Ducks in a Row: The Safest Way to Leave

36:00 – 21 Years In — How Do I Announce I'm Leaving? (Tash's Question)

37:00 – The Shark Analogy: Why "Nicely" Doesn't Change the Reaction

38:00 – "You Moved Money Without My Consent" — Financial Control (Jessie's Question)

40:00 – Boundaries vs Buffers: Why Boundaries Can Backfire (Anonymous)

44:00 – Parenting Apps, Grey Rocking & the Three Anchors

45:00 – Legal Abuse, Comeuppance & the 14% Uplift Case

46:00 – Intervention Orders + A House-Sharing Idea for the Stuck

🎧 EPISODES MENTIONED

Can You Make Them Leave? — https://youtu.be/_XAG5c1hOkU

Tech-Facilitated Abuse (WESNET SafetyNet Australia) — https://youtu.be/rc8b27R_k9k

The Three Anchors with Sonia Bestulic — https://youtu.be/aHULu7ffPj4

Capturing Coercive Control in an Affidavit — https://youtu.be/SIyXCGXH5nw

🔗 RESOURCES

1800 RESPECT 1800 737 732 | Lifeline 13 11 14 | Police 000

The Divorce Course — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au

Free Before-You-Go Checklist & Tech App Worksheet — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au

Share your voice for Krasi's conference (anonymous) — https://jtwqtij4vdy.typeform.com/to/bjpm4Gy2

Tech safety — https://techsafety.org.au

Davis & Davis [1984] — the case confirming it's unreasonable to expect separated people to live under one roof

If this episode helped you, please follow, rate, review and share so others stuck under one roof can find it too. Next week: Coercive Control & Financial Abuse.

• You keep asking yourself "is it me, or are they controlling?"

• The examples online always sound more extreme than what you're living

• You're walking on eggshells but second-guessing whether you're allowed to feel that way

• You've been told to "just set boundaries" but it only seems to make things worse

• You want to understand coercive control from both a psychological and a family-law angle

This is general education – not legal advice or a psychological diagnosis. It discusses coercive control and abuse. If you're in danger, call 000. Support: 1800 RESPECT 1800 737 732 | Lifeline 13 11 14.

"Is it me, or are they controlling?" That question ran under almost every message you sent in – so we turned it into a six-part series, and this is Part 1. Laura and Lyn are joined by clinical psychologist Krasi Kirova to answer the one nearly everyone asked: is this really coercive control?

Krasi shares her three Ds (disrespect, disempowerment, distortion), explains why coercive control is a pattern and a function rather than a list of behaviours, and how good qualities like compromise and empathy get weaponised. Lyn explains how family law treats coercive control differently from the criminal courts.

00:00 – Is It Me, or Are They Controlling?

03:30 – What Best Illustrates Coercive Control?

04:30 – The Restaurant Metaphor: Pattern, Not a Checklist

06:00 – The 3 Ds: Disrespect, Disempowerment, Distortion

07:30 – Psychology vs Family Law: Section 4AB

09:00 – Family Court vs Criminal Court: Different Tests

10:00 – When You Lose Sight of What's Reasonable

12:00 – How Compromise & Empathy Get Weaponised

13:00 – When Your Ex Wasn't As "Extreme" as the Examples

16:00 – Is Anger & Yelling Coercive Control?

18:00 – Can It Exist Without Financial Control?

19:00 – Repeated Pressure & Monopolised Decisions (

22:00 – Stonewalling, Delay & Deflection

25:30 – The PA Dynamic & Exploitation

28:00 – Needy or Controlling? How to Tell the Difference

30:00 – Blame-Shifting, DARVO & Perspecticide

33:00 – Infidelity, Guilt & Trying to Leave

39:00 – Silent Treatment as Punishment

43:00 – Why He Does Less When You're Sick

45:00 – Emotional Abuse vs Coercive Control

47:30 – Can the Main Breadwinner Be Controlled?

53:00 – Why Do They Do It? Can Survivors Heal?

58:00 – The Anxious, Controlling Attachment Style &

📌 Have your say: Krasi is presenting on coercive control at the Australian National Psychology Conference. Share what you wish psychologists and therapists understood – anonymously, with optional audio. Link in the show notes. Entry form https://jtwqtij4vdy.typeform.com/to/bjpm4Gy2

The 3 Ds of Coercive Control – the deep-dive episode with Krasi.https://youtu.be/bRmLZBRs--o?si=YZ1951oDofDe_lw7

• 1800 RESPECT 1800 737 732 | Lifeline 13 11 14 | Police 000

• Section 4AB, Family Law Act 1975 – definition of family violence

• Guest: Krasi Kirova, Clinical Psychologist

If this helped you start to name what you've been living, please follow, rate, review and share The Divorce Course Podcast so others going through the same thing can find it too.

• You feel like you're just reacting to whatever your ex or their lawyer throws at you

• You're exhausted, foggy, and making life-changing decisions while running on empty

• You can't tell anymore whether your choices come from your intuition or from fear

• You find it hard to speak up for yourself in mediation, in court, or even to your own lawyer

• You've lost a bit of yourself and want practical ways to feel grounded again

• You want to move from just surviving your divorce to actually flourishing through it

This podcast is general information only it is not legal advice. This episode touches on coercive control and post-separation abuse. If you or someone you know is in danger, call 000. For confidential support: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732).

If you're feeling stuck in survival mode reacting to every email, every legal letter, every move your ex makes this episode is the deep breath you've been needing. Laura is joined by Sonia Bestulic, award-winning author, speaker and wisdom teacher, whose book Flourish for Mums found Laura right in the middle of her own divorce. Together they unpack what survival mode actually is, why so many of us get stuck in it, and how to gently move out of it.

00:00 – Are You Stuck in Survival Mode During Your Divorce?

01:00 – Meet Sonia Bestulic: Author, Speaker & Wisdom Teacher

03:50 – "I Just Burnt Out": How Survival Mode Shows Up

05:30 – Why Your Mindset Can Affect Your Case as Much as the Law

07:00 – What Survival Mode Really Is (Fight, Flight, Freeze)

08:00 – The Lion Metaphor: A Fuel System Built for Short Bursts

09:30 – The Warning Signs You've Been in Survival Mode Too Long

10:50 – When Post-Separation Abuse Is Designed to Exhaust You

11:40 – The Three Anchors & Building Your Support Team

12:40 – Anchor One: Nourishing Your Intuition (Your Sacred GPS)

14:50 – Coercive Control & Learning to Trust Yourself Again

15:40 – The Morning Body Scan: 15 Minutes That Reset Your Day

18:30 – How to Tell the Difference Between Fear and Intuition

21:30 – Anchor Two: Energetic Integrity & Energy Hygiene

23:30 – Inner Boundaries: What's Mine to Carry and What's Theirs?

25:30 – Choosing When to Read That Email From Your Ex

26:40 – The Power of Nature to Recalibrate Your Nervous System

28:50 – Gratitude: The Highest-Frequency Circuit Breaker

30:00 – The Gratitude Candle & the Kindness Squirrel

32:50 – Anchor Three: Sacred Self-Advocacy

34:50 – Speaking Your Truth Without the Fight Energy

36:40 – Why Energy Speaks First (Even in the Witness Box)

40:40 – Daily Practices: Dance, Laughter, Music & Breath

43:50 – The Cup of Gratitude Ritual

45:40 – The Roots Metaphor: The Deeper the Roots, the Taller We Grow

48:40 – The One Thing You Can Start Today

49:50 – Where to Find Sonia & Her Books

• 1800 RESPECT — 1800 737 732 (24/7 DV support)

• Lifeline — 13 11 14

• Police — 000 (immediate danger)

• The Divorce Course — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au

• The Divorce Course Empowerment Playlist — on Spotify

• Sonia Bestulic — books Flourish for Mums and Raising Empowered Humans: Unlocking Kids' Self-Leadership and Lifelong Flourishing (Amazon, global delivery). https://soniabestulic.com.au/

🎧 Listen if…
- You've been told you "can't touch anything" until property settlement is finalised
- You're scared opening your own account will start a fight
- You're watching money vanish from the joint account and can't stop it
- You're the lower earner, worried about being left with nothing while you wait
- You're paying for everything and scared of being called financially abusive if you stop
- You've got a kids' savings or education account and don't know where it fits

Disclaimer: General information and education only, not legal advice. Please consult a family lawyer about your situation.
🛟 Discusses financial abuse & coercive control.

Can you really not touch any money until property settlement? Mum and I unpack what you can and can't do with your bank accounts after separation: the difference between managing day-to-day finances and dividing property, what happens to accounts in your own name versus joint accounts, and how to handle it whether your ex is amicable, high conflict, or controlling. We cover opening a new account, freezing joint accounts, what to do if it's emptied, kids' accounts, child support myths, and the warning signs of financial abuse.

⏱️ CHAPTERS
00:00 – Banking Through Separation: The Questions Everyone's Afraid to Ask
02:00 – Education Only & Why Your Lawyer Comes First
03:00 – The Two Big Myths: "Freeze Everything" vs "Take Everything"
03:30 – Power Dynamics & Who Makes the Early Money Decisions
04:00 – Managing Day-to-Day Finances vs Dividing Property
05:30 – What Happens to Your Bank Accounts When You Separate
06:00 – "It's Yours": Accounts in Your Own Name
07:00 – Joint Accounts & Why You Can Take Your Share
09:30 – Amicable Divorce: Take It, Then Tell Them
11:00 – High Conflict: Don't Stay Beholden to Your Ex
12:30 – Manipulative & Controlling Exes & the Groceries Analogy
13:30 – Is Taking the Money Financial Abuse? Section 4AB Explained
14:00 – Spousal Maintenance & the Joint-Account "Time Bomb"
15:30 – Post-Separation Spending, Wastage & Gollings & Scott
17:30 – Opening Your Own Bank Account (Yes, You Can)
18:30 – Why You Should Choose a Completely Different Bank
20:30 – "Will My Ex Find Out?" Tech Abuse, Passwords & Disclosure
22:30 – Where Should Your Wages Go?
23:00 – Coming Up: A Coercive Control Q&A With Krazi Kirova
23:30 – When Your Ex Won't Move Out or Pay the Bills
24:30 – Reasonableness & How a Judge Will See It
26:00 – Giving Notice, Justifying It & Part N of the Financial Statement
27:00 – The Two People This Goes Badly For
28:30 – Talking to the Bank & Their Limits
29:00 – How to Freeze a Joint Account (Two to Sign)
31:00 – Stopping Large Withdrawals & ATM Limits
32:00 – When the Account Gets Emptied: Spousal Maintenance Options
33:00 – Urgent Spousal Maintenance Orders Explained
35:00 – Protect vs Punish: Two Money Mindsets in Divorce
36:00 – Homework: Talk to Your Bank Anonymously
37:30 – Splitting the Cash 50/50: Does It Lock In Your Settlement?
39:00 – How to Document It (A Text Message Is Enough)
40:30 – Kids' Bank Accounts: Who Controls Them?
41:30 – Splitting Kids' Accounts & Trustee Options
42:30 – Using the Kids' Money to Live On (If You Have To)
43:30 – Kids' Accounts Are Part of the Property Pool & Disclosure
44:00 – Child Support Myths: The "Every Dollar for the Kids" Trap
45:30 – The "Basket of Goods" Approach & Living to Your Means
47:30 – Warning Signs of Financial Abuse
49:30 – Real-Time Spend Alerts, Passwords & Your Safety
50:45 – Day-to-Day Finances vs Property Settlement: The Recap
51:30 – Get on the Mailing List So You're Not Blindsided
52:00 – Final Homework: Go Open That New Bank Account
53:30 – Crochet Corner & Sign Off
54:30 – Commonwealth Bank Next Chapter & Banking Support

🎧 EPISODES
Technology Abuse / Tech Safety – passwords, devices & safety checklist: https://youtu.be/rc8b27R_k9k
Balancing the Power Dynamic – when one party stalls while the other pushes for settlement: https://youtu.be/coWlWcIq180

1800 RESPECT 1800 737 732 | Lifeline 13 11 14 | Police 000
Web: www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/blog
Q&A questions: thedivorcecoursepodcast@gmail.com
CommBank Next Chapter – financial abuse support.

Helped you feel less stuck about your money? Follow, rate, review and share so others can find it too.

All our best,
Laura & Lyn
Your Guides By Your Side
Co-Hosts of THE DIVORCE COURSE PODCAST

🎧 Listen If…

• Your child has said they don't want to go to the other parent's house

• Your ex keeps saying "once they turn [a certain age] they can choose"

• You're worried your child is being pressured, coached, or caught in the middle

• You're hearing two completely different stories from your kids at handover

• You're amicable and thinking of just "letting the kids decide" (please listen first)

• You want to understand how children's views actually reach the court

General information only not legal advice. Always consult a qualified family lawyer about your situation.🛟 Discusses family violence & coercive control. In danger: 000. Support: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732), Lifeline 13 11 14.

About This Episode

Mum and I unpack what the Family Law Act actually how children's views really reach a judge (family reports, child impact reports, ICLs), and how kids' wishes play out across the four divorce personality types.

⏱️ Timeline

00:00 Can a Child Choose Which Parent to Live With?

02:00 Why the Family Court Won't Ask Kids to Choose

06:27 The Best Interests of the Child Test (Section 60CC)

09:06 What Age Can a Child Decide Where to Live?

11:34 How a Child's Wishes Are Actually Heard in Family Law

13:25 Child-Inclusive Mediation Explained

15:22 Therapy, Family Reports & Expert Evidence

19:48 How to Get a Family Report Outside of Court

22:35 How Family Violence Changes Parenting Decisions

27:22 2024 Family Law Reforms & Common Custody Myths

28:29 Can You Force a Teenager to Follow Parenting Orders?

31:58 The Reality of Enforcing Orders With Teens

33:03 How to Future-Proof Your Parenting Orders

34:03 Why Older Teens Have More Say in Where They Live

34:35 The Manipulative & Controlling Ex: Hidden Motives

36:42 How to Spot Coercion & Coaching Tactics

39:04 Love Bombing, Bribery & When the Mask Slips

41:54 High-Conflict Exes: Kids Caught in the Middle

45:20 The Avoidant Parent & Parentification

49:02 Amicable Co-Parents: Why You Still Shouldn't Let Kids Decide

51:07 Key Takeaways: Voice Heard, Not Decision Made

54:43 Closing Notes & Legal Disclaimer

🎧 Episodes Mentioned

• Decoding the Child's Best Interests Referenced when discussing the full 60CC best-interests factors https://youtu.be/k4-QTbfW8XM?si=4ltIq0y0ceoMQWym

• Child-Inclusive Mediation Referenced when discussing how children's views are gathered out of court. https://youtu.be/HrEU6dFc0Ko?si=xvSAyfnMJ9oEfXnN

• Handover Hell – When Your Child Refuses to Go Referenced at the end for listeners dealing with handover-day resistance https://youtu.be/YphzOPZmC3k?si=Wf1RwzJMf-ix4N4K

Support & Resources

📞 1800 RESPECT 1800 737 732 | Lifeline 13 11 14 | Police 000

The Divorce Course → https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au

If this helped, please follow, rate, review and share The Divorce Course Podcast so others can find it too.

All our best, Laura & Lyn – Your Guides By Your Side

🎧 Listen if you're wondering when you can make an offer, you've received one that floored you, you feel pressured to "be the reasonable one," your ex is high-conflict or controlling, or you've been told you have to go to mediation first.

⚠️ General information only, not legal advice Australian family law. Always consult a family lawyer.

🛟 Discusses coercive control & legal/financial abuse. Support: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732). ⏱️ Episode Timeline

00:00 – What Is an Offer in a Divorce?

01:50 – What an Offer Really Is (and What Counteroffers Are)

02:30 – Do You Need a Lawyer to Make an Offer?

03:30 – Why Emotional, People-Pleasing Offers Backfire

04:30 – What You Need Before You Make an Offer: Your Property Pool

05:00 – Future Needs, Super vs Cash

06:00 – Knowing What You're Giving Up With Eyes Wide Open

07:00 – Rushed & Blindsided Offers:

08:00 – Buying Time Before You Agree

09:00 – Can You Get Out of Something You Signed Under Pressure?

10:30 – When Can You Make an Offer? Anytime You're Informed

12:30 – The Best Time to Make Your First Offer & Saving Legal Fees

13:50 – The Mediation Myth: You Don't Have to Go

15:40 – Why People Only Get Realistic at Mediation

17:00 – Time-Limited Offers: Pressure, Deadlines & the Downside

20:00 – Standing Offers:

22:00 – Do Offers Work in Parenting

24:30 – Calderbank Offers & Section 114UB Explained

25:50 – Offer Strategy for an Avoidant Ex

28:30 – Offer Strategy for a High-Conflict "Yeah, But" Ex

31:20 – Offer Strategy for an Amicable Ex & Collaborative Law

36:20 – Can You Offer Directly to Your Ex While Lawyers Are Engaged?

37:00 – Making Offers to a Narcissistic or Controlling Ex

39:00 – Don't Feed the Reaction: Grey Rock & Shuttle Negotiation

41:50 – What to Do When You Get a Bad Offer

42:50 – Ambit Claims & the Central Practice Direction

44:00 – Ask for the Authorities: Turning a Bad Offer to Your Advantage

46:30 – The Consequences of Refusing a Reasonable Offer

48:50 – Genuine Steps, Compulsory Offers & Costs Protection

50:00 – Why Offers Stay Hidden From the Judge Until the End

Calderbank Offers & Costs — • Costs, Family Court and Calderbank Offers ...

Can You Really Mediate With a Narcissist? — • Mediation and negotiation tips for divorci...

— www.thedivorcecourse.com.au Enrol (DIY Divorce Blueprint, AU) — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/enrol

🎧 Listen to this episode if…

• You're wondering if you actually need a lawyer for your divorce at all

• You're worried that spending too much now means you can't afford court later

• You're scared that "lawyering up" will make your ex worse

• You think it's all-or-nothing and want to know the middle ground

• Your ex is high-conflict, avoidant, controlling, or amicable and you need a strategy that fits

⚠️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is general information only it is not legal advice. It reflects Australian family law and may not apply to your situation. Always consult a qualified family lawyer about your circumstances. Laws may have changed since recording.

Most people think there are only two options when it comes to lawyers in a divorce hand everything over, or go it completely alone. But that's not the truth, and believing it can cost you thousands.

In this episode, Laura and Lyn break down the three ways you can actually use a lawyer.

Then they get into what nobody talks about how your divorce personality type should completely change how you use a lawyer. A manipulative and controlling ex who runs up your fees needs a very different strategy to an avoidant ex who panics at a law firm's letterhead

This isn't an episode telling you to avoid lawyers. It's about using them strategically for the parts where legal expertise genuinely matters, and not for the parts that just drain your property pool.

00:00 – Do You Need a Lawyer for Divorce? The Big Myth

01:40 – The All-or-Nothing Lawyer Myth & Talking About Costs

03:00 – Why Spending Too Much on Lawyers Early Can Backfire

04:00 – The 2 Critical Times You MUST See a Lawyer

05:00 – Why Seeing a Lawyer Early Bursts Unrealistic Expectations

06:20 – Before You Sign: Why a Lawyer's Eye Matters

08:20 – The 3 Ways to Use a Lawyer: The First-Class Ride

09:50 – The 3 Ways to Use a Lawyer: Step In, Step Out

11:20 – Divorce Personality Types: Manipulative & Controlling

12:50 – Using Your Lawyer Strategically Against Fee-Running Tactics

15:00 – Should You Take a Lawyer or Barrister to Mediation?

17:00 – Divorce Personality Types: High Conflict

19:00 – Divorce Personality Types: The Avoidant Ex

21:30 – Divorce Personality Types: The Amicable Ex

23:40 – Project-Managing Your Lawyer & the Addario & Addario Case

26:00 – Why Understanding the Process Stops Panic Spending

33:00 – The Middle Way + Legal Aid & Community Legal Services

34:00 – The DIY Divorce Blueprint & Sign-Off

🎧 Episodes

1. How Much Does Getting Divorced Actually Cost? — https://youtu.be/x-sgBNjlTHo?si=ubdIhcS1mjSrQqEk

2. Bombarded With Legal Letters — https://youtu.be/z11Id8YdQn4?si=ucYfGThRuRcFYoH6

3. Mediation or Manipulation? — https://youtu.be/cmcFWXD2EBs?si=BMV5KY4CquSx1_dN

4. Do You Need to Take a Lawyer to Mediation? — https://youtu.be/GB2lJftxdh4?si=vNwQueYHJhFrY3aP

5. Community Legal Services: How to Use Them — https://youtu.be/4sEUhu6r07Q?si=1oYsGQ3vF1Eb2Y4M

📚 Links & Resources

📞 1800 RESPECT — 1800 737 732 (24/7 DV support) 📞 Lifeline — 13 11 14 🚓 Police — 000 (immediate danger) 🌐 The Divorce Course — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au 🎓 The DIY Divorce Blueprint — enrolments open until 10 June 2026 (click "Enroll Now")

💌 If this episode helped you understand how to use a lawyer wisely – and where you can save thousands – please follow, rate, review, and share The Divorce Course Podcast so others going through the same thing can find it too.

🎧 Listen to This Episode If…

• You want a real, plain-English breakdown of divorce process fees

• You're terrified to leave because you've heard divorce costs hundreds of thousands of dollars

• Your ex is telling you "leave the lawyers out of it" and you're not sure if they're right

• You've already started racking up legal fees and you're wondering where it's all going

• You want to understand exactly what you can do yourself versus what you actually need a lawyer for

• You're heading into mediation and don't know if you need a barrister too
  
  

⚠️ Legal Disclaimer

This podcast is general information only – it is not legal advice. The content reflects Australian family law. Always consult a qualified family lawyer. fees may have changed since this episode was recorded (figures quoted reflect May 2026 pricing).

This isn't an episode designed to scare you. Laura and Lyn walk you through where you have control, where you can save thousands by doing the work yourself,

00:00 – The Real Cost of Divorce: Why Some Pay $4K and Others $300K

02:36 – The Big Three Fears

04:14 – How Much Does a Divorce Application Actually Cost?

06:35 – Why Lawyers Charge for "Accepting Service"

08:01 – Negotiation Costs:

11:00 – Hourly Rates in 2026:

12:30 – The Cost of Phone Calls, Reviewing Offers & Meetings

14:30 – How Much to Draft Consent Orders

16:00 – Disclosure: The Biggest Budget Blowout in Divorce

19:00 – Paralegal Rates vs Lawyer Rates: Don't Overpay

20:30 – Drip-Feeding vs Dumping Disclosure

23:30 – Mediation Costs

24:50 – Do You Need a Barrister at Mediation?

27:00 – Half-Day vs Full-Day Mediation

29:30 – Hidden Costs

32:30 – The Court's Scale of Fees vs What Lawyers Actually Charge

33:30 – How Sending Late-Night Emails Costs You

34:30 – How People Waste Money

35:30 – Fighting Over Furniture, Revenge Litigation & Lawyer-as-Therapist

36:30 – Stubbornness, Unrealistic Expectations & Knowing When to Let Go

37:30 – Family Law Doesn't Deliver Justice or Retribution

39:00 – How Much to File Consent Orders ($205 Court Fee)

41:00 – How to Be Smart: When to Use a Lawyer and When Not To

41:30 – Saving Thousands on Disclosure by Doing It Yourself

43:00 – The One Meeting Strategy: Walk In Prepared, Walk Out Saving $10K

46:00 – Who Pays for Legal Fees? Section 114UB Explained

47:30 – Fee Exemptions, Cost Agreements & What to Expect

49:30 – Laura's Confession: The Bag of Receipts Story

🎧 Episodes Mentioned in This Episode

1. How to Choose a Mediator (Free vs Private Mediation) https://youtu.be/HKda6QswjAE?si=R27SD6WSDiLiI3VA

2. Do You Need a Lawyer for Mediation? https://youtu.be/GB2lJftxdh4?si=ur8ZMCkzPQ9dYFZN

3. Furniture in Divorce: How to Deal With It Without Blowing Your Budgethttps://youtu.be/oZ5h-gxckXU

4. Consent Orders Explained https://youtu.be/-DC72tq8FRM

🎟️ Free Webinar — Register at www.thedivorcecourse.com.au (click "Reserve My Seat")

• Family Law Act 1975 – Section 114UB (each party bears their own costs)

https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/legis/cth/consol_act/fla1975114/

• https://www.fcfcoa.gov.au/fl/costs

• https://www.fcfcoa.gov.au/fl/pubs/legal-costs

• The Divorce Course Disclosure Checklist —https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/disclosure_checklist_o