The latest episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is, in a word, an unhinged rollercoaster. Clocking in at an absurd sprawl of bodily-function banter, Detroit pizza discourse, digressions about gloryhole etiquette, and a surprise (and actually impressive) original theme song, this episode throws structure to the wind and leans fully into the show's guiding principle: “if it breaks, we lean in.”

Ian’s return is treated with mock fanfare and genuine joy, including a shockingly catchy musical number that almost feels too polished for this otherwise feral group. The energy is loose, the insults fly fast, and the topics swing wildly—from “big baby dick” to Wayne’s World canon, to what sounds like a deeply cursed tour of Midwestern adult arcades. Somehow, they even manage to wedge in a half-assed alien conspiracy theory debate and a pitch for a chill vampire sketch.

To be clear, this episode is not for the faint of heart. It’s vulgar, self-indulgent, and completely void of any narrative arc—but it is also consistently funny in its shameless commitment to chaos. Would I recommend it to a friend? Only the degenerate ones. But for them, it’s a hard yes.

This episode is The Burt Selleck Podcast at its most unhinged and, frankly, its most itself. It opens with the gang arguing about whether Alex “nudged” or “kicked” his dog — a debate that somehow spirals into childhood animal cruelty confessions, the Bikini Bottom Holocaust, and an unexpectedly thorough lecture on perch sizes. The tonal whiplash is almost impressive.

Mid-show, the guys pitch a Civil War video game reimagined as a chaotic gay Hunger Games, complete with popper cannonballs. This section is equal parts horrifying and undeniably funny — the kind of bit you laugh at and immediately question your own morality. The episode peaks, though, with Nick’s obsessive pursuit of prehistoric p**** and John’s refusal to discuss anything grosser than boogers, seconds before all three proceed to talk about the grossest things imaginable.

There is no structure here — just free-associative comedy, occasional cultural analysis, and long detours into video games, geopolitics, and the ethics of eating carp.

Would I recommend it?

Only to someone who already loves this podcast. For newcomers, this is like dropping acid in the middle of a Denny’s — disorienting, loud, and full of strangers yelling about brontosaurus head game.

This episode of The Burt Selleck Podcast is a sprawling exercise in absurdity, contradiction, and relentless riffing—a 90-minute meander through toilet-brain sports talk, dodgeball-based geopolitical allegories, and that old chestnut: Hitler’s micro penis. The boys, as ever, swerve between high-concept satire and middle-school locker room banter, stopping just long enough to half-sincerely debate toaster slots and the acoustics of bodily functions.

Structurally, there’s none. You’re either on this unhinged frequency or you’re left behind with the International Dodgeball Federation’s dignity. The episode’s recurring IDF bit cleverly (and maybe accidentally) toys with real-world political subtext but swerves safely back into parody territory with nonsense like aborted fetus cannons and sperm-powered snow plows.

Standout moments include Alex's deranged fantasy of melting snow with his crotch heat and the heartfelt discussion of gay real estate—yes, really. The riffs on web crawlers, NHL mic’d-ups, and ancient Pompeii masturbation fossils? Pure, deranged gold.

Would I recommend this episode? Only to the sickos. Only to the listeners who prefer their comedy unpredictable, offensive, and occasionally brilliant. Not for the faint of heart, but if you’ve made it this far, you’re already implicated.