The Cubs are limping into October. The Bears exact revenge on Matt Eberflus. St. Louis City keeps winning whenever Ron isn’t watching. Newcastle United hands Ron the result he hates most: a nil-nil draw. Meanwhile, the Cardinals are already planning for 2026.

Join Ron, Elliott, and Pete for all the chaos, snark, and sports analysis you didn’t know you needed.

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Anthony Rizzo threw himself the retirement party of the century, and the guys can’t help but linger on Cubs talk longer than usual. Eventually, they pivot to St. Louis, where Masyn Winn has shut it down after a second torn meniscus.

Ron delivers his first completely positive Soccer Minute of the season: new Newcastle kicks, wins for both the Magpies and City, and even a Messi sighting as Charlotte knocked off Miami.

To wrap it all up, the crew forces themselves to relive Sunday’s disaster in Detroit, where the Bears flat-out forgot to play the second half.

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Pete spent the day doing some investigative journalism. He made calls, pulled records, and chased down leads no one else had the courage — or the free time — to chase.

Something is clearly wrong. Since the All-Star Break, every team ToR follows has decided to embrace mediocrity — at best! — as a lifestyle choice. This weak, the Team discusses the Cubs dropping out of the NL Central race, the Cardinals’ tragic number reducing to four, CITY hovering dangerously close to the Wooden Spoon, and Newcastle drawing Leeds, not to mention the Bears spending Monday's fourth quarter collapsing as performance art.

Because after careful research, meticulous analysis, and hours of reflection, Pete finally uncovered the root cause of all this misery.

It’s Ron’s fault.

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