Julie Legg speaks with registered therapeutic counsellor Ariel-Paul Saunders, who brings a relational, intergenerational lens to understanding ADHD. Diagnosed at 38, Ariel began questioning the traditional medical narrative after recognising that his most significant struggles with focus and regulation didn’t begin in childhood, but emerged following a major relational rupture in early adulthood.

Together, Julie and Ariel explore ADHD not just as a fixed neurological condition, but as something shaped by attachment patterns, nervous system regulation, and family lineage. From wartime trauma passed down through generations to the orchid-and-dandelion analogy of sensitivity, this conversation reframes ADHD as a developmental journey rather than a personal defect.

It’s an episode about compassion for ourselves, our parents, and our children, and about becoming the generation that transforms what gets passed forward.

Key Points from the Episode

• Why Ariel’s ADHD symptoms intensified after a relational rupture in his early 20s
• What felt incomplete about the traditional medical explanation of ADHD
• The role of nervous system regulation in how ADHD presents
• Attachment, safety, and how connection shapes focus and executive function
• The “orchid vs dandelion” analogy for sensitivity and environmental fit
• How trauma and emotional numbing can be passed down without intention
• Reframing ADHD as lineage rather than personal failure
• How understanding our parents changes how we understand ourselves
• Supporting children by seeing the state beneath the behaviour
• Growing through ADHD traits, not necessarily “out of” them
• Becoming the generation that shifts relational patterns forward

Links

• FREE CONSULTATION: https://securelythriving.com/book-a-call
• FREE RESOURCE: https://securelythriving.com/free-resource
• ARTICLE: Why-my-adhd-didnt-appear-until-age-21
• ARTICLE: The Neuroscience of How Attachment Shapes ADHD: From Dopamine to Executive Function
• ARTICLE: Three Generations of ADHD
• INSTAGRAM: @securelythrivingfamily
• FACEBOOK: @securelythriving
• LINKEDIN: Ariel-Paul Saunders
• YOUTUBE: @securelythriving

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ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More