It’s easy to feel steady in love—until you and your partner aren’t moving at the same pace. When one person is ready for the next step and the other isn’t, even the healthiest relationships can start to feel uncertain. Julie and Yue sit down with clinical psychologist and bestselling author Dr. Alexandra Solomon to unpack what’s really happening beneath pace discrepancies. Drawing from her groundbreaking work on relational self-awareness, Dr. Solomon explains why mismatched timing activates attachment patterns, old schemas, and deep questions about worthiness—and how couples can navigate these moments without spiraling into fear, pressure, or ultimatums.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why Pace Discrepancies Trigger Attachment, Anxiety, and Self-Doubt

• How Your Past Bonds Influence the Meaning You Make in These Moments

• How to Communicate Needs and Hopes Without Issuing an Ultimatum

• How to Tell the Difference Between a Temporary Pause and a Fundamental Misalignment

• Why One Partner Often Moves Faster (or Slower) — and What That Reveals About Their Inner World

• How to Stay Connected, Curious, and Compassionate Through Mismatched Timing

• When to Keep Moving Forward Together — and When It Might Be Time to Walk Away

To learn more about Dr. Solomon: follow @dr.alexandra.solomon, listen to Reimagining Love, and read her books Loving Bravely, Taking Sexy Back, and Love Every Day.