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MBT EN – Understanding Mentalization-Based Treatment

MBT EN – Understanding Mentalization-Based Treatment

By: Jasper Manders
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MBT – An Introduction to Mentalization-Based Treatment Discover how understanding your own mind — and the minds of others — can transform relationships, emotions, and self-awareness. This podcast series guides you through the 11 sessions of Mentalization-Based Treatment for adults, offering insight, reflection, and practical ways to strengthen your ability to mentalize.Jasper Manders Science Social Sciences
Episodes
  • #25: MBT Group Therapy > Between Losing Control and Trying to Hold Yourself Together
    May 22 2026

    🎙️ Special Episode – “Between Losing Control and Trying to Hold Yourself Together”


    Welcome to this special episode of the MBT podcast.

    In this group session, an intense conversation unfolds about control, helplessness, and the fear of what happens when emotions become too overwhelming to keep pushing away.


    What makes this session powerful is how clearly it shows that many group members, each in their own way, are trying to maintain control over tension, insecurity, and overwhelming emotions.


    Today, we listen to a group session where themes such as self-criticism, emotional control, not feeling seen, and the struggle between feeling and avoiding come to the surface.



    🧠 What this episode explores


    Being overwhelmed by emotions


    Several group members describe how emotions can suddenly hit without warning.


    Frustration.

    Anger.

    Sadness.

    Helplessness.


    Feelings that once seemed manageable

    can suddenly take over completely.


    And that loss of control can feel frightening.



    Keeping the lid on emotions


    The session reveals how differently people try to cope with emotions.


    Some spend years suppressing and controlling their feelings.

    Others experience emotions exploding in every direction with almost no control at all.


    But both responses serve the same purpose:

    trying to protect yourself from being overwhelmed.



    Self-criticism and pressure to perform


    An important theme in this session is the harsh way group members look at themselves.


    Doubting yourself.

    Always needing to do more.

    Never feeling truly good enough.


    Compliments are difficult to accept,

    while mistakes become painfully magnified.



    Not feeling seen


    The painful feeling of not being important enough also strongly emerges.


    When someone finally becomes vulnerable,

    but feels that nothing is really done with it,

    pain and disappointment quickly follow.


    The group explores how deeply this feeling can hurt —

    especially when someone is genuinely trying to ask for help or be honest.



    Old patterns under stress


    What this session strongly highlights

    is how quickly old survival patterns return under pressure.


    Trying to stay in control.

    Shutting down emotionally.

    Exploding in anger.

    Or disappearing into yourself completely.


    The therapists help the group slow down and stay curious about what lies underneath these reactions.



    🌟 The common thread


    The central theme of this episode is the tension between trying to stay in control and allowing yourself to truly feel.


    The fear of being overwhelmed

    exists alongside the need to finally be honest about what is happening inside.


    Mentalizing helps people not to immediately run away from emotions,

    but to pause and explore what is truly being triggered —

    within themselves and in connection with others.



    💬 Closing


    This episode shows how difficult it can be to allow emotions when you have spent years learning to protect yourself from them.


    But it also shows how important it is not to carry everything alone.


    Sometimes, change does not begin with controlling emotions,

    but with the moment you dare to admit:


    “I don’t know how to handle this right now.”

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    35 mins
  • #24: MBT 1 on 1 Therapy > Between setting boundaries and losing each other
    May 20 2026

    🎙️ Special Episode – “Between Setting Boundaries and Losing Each Other”


    Welcome to this special episode of the MBT podcast.

    In this episode, you are once again given a unique insight into a one-on-one therapy session — a space where emotions, patterns, and relationships become visible as they unfold in everyday life.


    What makes this session powerful is how clearly it shows what can happen when one person begins to change, while the relationship around them struggles to move along with that change.


    Today, we listen to a conversation about tension, setting boundaries, old patterns, and the search for connection without losing yourself again.



    🧠 What this episode explores


    Old patterns returning


    This session reveals how quickly old survival patterns can return under stress.


    People-pleasing.

    Avoiding conflict.

    Continuously searching for understanding.


    Even when someone has already made significant progress, emotionally unsafe situations can still reactivate old responses.



    Setting boundaries without guilt


    An important theme in this episode is learning to express needs and boundaries.


    Not from anger or control,

    but from calmness and self-care.


    At the same time, this creates tension within relationships — especially when the other person is still used to the old dynamic.



    Not feeling heard


    A recurring feeling throughout this session is the experience of not truly being heard or understood.


    When someone calmly tries to explain what they feel,

    but the other person mainly reacts from frustration or blame, distance begins to grow.


    And that distance touches deeper emotional wounds.



    How change affects relationships


    What this session strongly highlights

    is that personal growth does not only change you —

    it also changes the relationship with the people around you.


    When someone stops adapting so much,

    begins to slow down,

    and starts listening more to themselves,

    the dynamic with others automatically shifts as well.


    And that can create confusion, resistance, and insecurity.



    Allowing yourself to matter


    One of the most powerful moments in this episode

    is the realization that self-care is not selfish.


    That your needs are allowed to exist.

    That rest is allowed to matter.

    And that you do not have to constantly perform in order to be valuable.


    Slowly, a new feeling begins to emerge:


    I am allowed to matter too.



    🌟 The common thread


    The central theme of this episode is the tension

    between staying connected to others

    and staying true to yourself.


    The need to keep harmony

    clashes with the need to stop crossing your own boundaries.


    Mentalizing helps by creating space to pause instead of reacting immediately from emotion —

    to reflect on what is truly happening

    within yourself and within the other person.



    💬 Closing


    This episode shows how difficult change within relationships can be.


    Not because people do not care about each other,

    but because old patterns and new boundaries can collide in painful ways.


    And sometimes, growth does not begin with fighting harder to be understood,

    but with allowing yourself to feel:


    “My feelings are allowed to exist too.”

    Show More Show Less
    35 mins
  • #23: MBT Group Therapy: Between Insecurity, Validation, and Daring to Be Seen
    May 17 2026

    🎙️ Special Episode – “Between Insecurity, Validation, and Daring to Be Seen”


    Welcome to this special episode of the MBT podcast.

    In this group session, an open conversation unfolds about insecurity, validation, and the tension between protecting yourself and allowing yourself to be seen.


    What makes this session powerful is how clearly it shows that many group members struggle with the same underlying questions:


    Am I important enough?

    Do I matter?

    Am I allowed to take up space?



    🧠 What this episode explores


    Fear of rejection


    The group reveals how insecurity affects relationships, work, and friendships.


    When contact feels inconsistent, or someone responds with distance, doubt quickly appears:


    * Did I do something wrong?

    * Am I too much?

    * Does this mean I am not important?



    Protecting yourself


    Several group members recognize how they try to protect themselves from disappointment.


    By keeping distance.

    By acting “cool.”

    By not fully showing their emotions.


    Because the stronger the connection feels,

    the greater the fear of losing it becomes.



    Work, performance, and validation


    Work and performance also turn out to be deeply connected to self-worth.


    Success creates safety.

    Recognition creates relief.


    But what happens when that validation disappears?

    Or when you begin to doubt yourself and what you are still capable of?



    Being critical of yourself


    This session also highlights how harsh people can be toward themselves.


    Compliments are difficult to receive.

    Success gets minimized.

    And the bar keeps moving higher.


    The group explores how self-criticism can become a way of staying emotionally safe.



    Change within relationships


    An important theme in this session is how personal change affects relationships.


    When someone begins to respond differently, stops people-pleasing, or starts setting boundaries, the dynamic with others changes as well.


    And that can create confusion, distance, or insecurity — on both sides.



    🌟 The common thread


    The central theme of this episode is the search for connection without losing yourself.


    The need for validation

    exists alongside the fear of rejection.


    The desire to be seen

    exists alongside the urge to protect yourself.


    Mentalizing helps people pause and reflect on what lies beneath that insecurity — and to stay curious about themselves and others.



    💬 Closing


    This episode shows how deeply insecurity can influence relationships and everyday interactions.


    But it also shows how important it is to keep making space for honesty, vulnerability, and connection.


    Sometimes, change does not begin with certainty,

    but with the courage to say:


    “This is what is happening inside me.”

    Show More Show Less
    41 mins
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