Why communication won’t fix your relationship and how nervous system regulation, trust, and pattern work actually create lasting change.

🧭 Take the Relational Compass
https://www.lipcouples.com/compass

💛 Explore Together in Practice
https://www.lipcouples.com/

Most couples believe they have a communication problem.

They don’t.

They have a nervous system problem.

In this episode, we break down why better scripts, clearer language, and communication tools often fail to create real change. When protectors, childhood conditioning, and emotional triggers are running the conversation, no amount of “healthy communication” fixes the underlying pattern.

We unpack:

• Why communication tools fail under stress
• Nervous system regulation vs communication skills
• Emotional safety and chosen trust
• The difference between reaction and response
• The 3-step process we use: Reveal → Rewire → Relate
• How to interrupt repeating relational patterns
• What actually builds lasting intimacy

If you’re in your 30s or 40s, building a life, raising kids, growing a business, and determined not to repeat your parents’ relationship dynamics, this conversation is for you.

Communication matters.

But it only works when the nervous system shifts first.

#relationships #relationshipadvice #communicationproblems #attachmentstyles #emotionalsafety #marriagegrowth

Connect with Us

Work with Emily and Kelly for Couples Coaching

Connect with Emily on IG @emilygoughcoach

Connect with Kelly on IG @iamkellygardner

Leave a Review

If this conversation resonated, please share it with someone you love and leave a review wherever you listen. It helps this podcast reach more people who are ready to practice love...and that's what the world needs most right now.

Conflict is going to happen in a healthy relationship. And more often than not, conflict starts with something laughably small – from doing dishes, to making food, and even how to decoratively light a podcast. But underneath the menial cause of conflict always lies a much deeper need that isn’t being met.

This episode originally aired in February 2024 on Emily's podcast, Room to Grow as we unpacked a conflict we literally had in real time as we were trying to record this episode.

Yes, seriously, we couldn’t even record this podcast without a small conflict of our own. Yes, it was something super small (how to decoratively light this episode for video) which we playfully recount, but then take you through our thorough resolution and beautiful potential of the conflict repair process.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why conflict is so often over small things
• One partner taking leadership on certain things in a relationship
• Compassionate communication
• Assuming positive intent in others
• Trusting your partner through conflict
• Expressing your needs and asking for your needs to be met
• How to fully resolve a conflict in a relationship
• The repair process of conflict
• Discovering breakthroughs through conflict
• The essential elements of repairing conflict in a relationship
• How conflict is an opportunity to deepen your relationship

Stay tuned for so much more to come - we're shifting gears a bit next week and sharing more about the tools we use with our couples and how you can bring this into your own relationship for deeper connection and intimacy.

Connect with Us

Work with Emily and Kelly for Couples Coaching

Connect with Emily on IG @emilygoughcoach

Connect with Kelly on IG @iamkellygardner

Leave a Review

If this conversation resonated, please share it with someone you love and leave a review wherever you listen. It helps this podcast reach more people who are ready to practice love...and that's what the world needs most right now.

Every strong couple has them. Those tiny, invisible battles that shape connection, safety, and trust. In this episode we break down the unspoken power dynamics that show up in even the healthiest relationships: the triggers, shutdowns, leadership clashes, and moments where love meets old wounds.

This conversation is honest, grounded, and real. You’ll hear how two strong partners navigate emotional intensity, masculine/feminine energy, nervous system activation, and that push-pull dance between independence and intimacy.

In this episode, we're getting into:

• The micro power struggles couples overlook and why they matter
• The strong independent woman dynamics and how they impact emotional safety
• What men truly want from a woman in partnership and how you can both tap into each others' unique strengths
• Having difficult conversations about relational agreements and asking for what you want
• The idea of "feminine expression" and what Instagram influencers get wrong about it...especially when it comes to real-life relationships
• Why couples get stuck in the same reactive loop of spiraling or shutdown
• How nervous systems collide and what creates instant safety
• Shared leadership and taking fully ownership and responsibility, even when it means pushing through fears

You’ll walk away with:

A clearer understanding of your relational patterns and the dynamics that might be playing out in your own relationship, along with some of the major shifts strong couples must master to grow together.

Connect with Us

Work with Emily and Kelly for Couples Coaching

Connect with Emily on IG @emilygoughcoach

Connect with Kelly on IG @iamkellygardner

Leave a Review

If this conversation resonated, please share it with someone you love and leave a review wherever you listen. It helps this podcast reach more people who are ready to practice love...and that's what the world needs most right now.