This week, I’m joined by Lou Beckett – mum of two, history teacher and wife of comedian Rob Beckett – who shares a hilariously raw take on what it really means to be the default parent. Lou talks about carrying the invisible labour and mental load while Rob is away, the identity freefall of stepping away from work, and why women are still expected to “have it all” while running on no sleep. We get into birth trauma, breastfeeding guilt, and why feeding your baby formula is not a moral failing. Lou explains what it really means to be the default parent, why schools always ring mum first, and how resentment quietly builds over time. We also talk about being completely “touched out” by kids hanging off you all day, and then being expected to switch into sex kitten mode the minute your partner walks through the door. This is a funny, deeply validating conversation for anyone who has ever thought: I love my kids, but I am absolutely done.

BOOKS DISCUSSED IN THIS EPISODE

Lou’s Book, Lessons from a Default Parent: Surviving the Front Line of Family Life (Without Losing Your Sh*t), is available to buy from 12th February 2026.

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CREDITS:

Host: Bryony Gordon

Guest: Lou Beckett

Producer: Laura Elwood-Craig

Assistant Producer: Sam Rhodes

Studio Manager: Sam Chisholm

Editor: Luke Shelley

Exec Producer: Jamie East

A Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.

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