What happens when life throws you the biggest plot twist imaginable and you’ve no choice but to crack on?

In this raw, funny and beautifully honest episode of It’s Got Pockets, I sit down with the brilliant Gemma Ray, author, speaker, podcast host, mum and kinship foster carer to talk about what happens when “having it all” turns into holding it all together.

Gemma’s story is ever evolving and has all the curve balls.

One moment she’s running a thriving six-figure business. The next, she’s standing in a school reception, unknowingly about to change her entire life.

Within hours, Gemma and her husband were suddenly carers for two young children; a decision that reshaped everything: her business, her marriage, her identity and her belief in what makes a “mum.”

Together, we talk about:
🔥 The myth of Supermum and why we need to stop performing resilience.
🔥 Cracking on vs. cracking open and how to spot the difference.
🔥 Kinship foster care, trauma-informed parenting and the brutal beauty of doing the right thing even when it breaks you open.
🔥 The Non-Violent Resistance (NVR) model that helped Gemma rebuild connection, calm, and self-trust.
🔥 Why “And so f*cking what” might just be the mantra every woman needs in her back pocket.

This is the kind of conversation that reminds you that survival isn’t weakness, it’s wisdom.

It’s about ditching perfection, rebuilding trust in yourself and remembering that you can’t pour from a cup that’s cracked.

Expect laughter, swearing, heart and a whole lot of truth about motherhood, burnout and the reality of leading life on your own terms.

💥 Quote Moments:

• “We crack on, and crack on, until something small makes us crack open.”
• “I thought I could be Supermum. Turns out, I’m human.”
• “Self-trust is the bridge between who I was and who I’m becoming.”
• “And so f*cking what.”

🎧 Listen if you’ve ever felt:

• Tired of holding it all together
• Caught between ambition and exhaustion
• Ready to stop performing perfect and start living honest

And if you’re in in that life stage, where all the curve balls keep on coming without a break and want to be in a room where lived experience counts, where you don’t have to translate yourself and where backing yourself becomes the work, you’ll find your people through FoundHer Fire.

This is It’s Got Pockets. Stories for women with experience who are not done yet.

Now crack on.

Thanks for listening. This episode was sponsored by Birkdale Insurance Group – a people-first business with a powerhouse of talented female board members bucking the male-dominated financial services trend.

Find out more at birkdaleinsurancegroup.co.uk

Sarah is the founder of FoundHer Fire—a membership space for experienced women in business who know real success isn’t just about strategy, it’s about self; a place, a space, a community where women find their fire, for women who aren't done yet and who are ready to write their own rules of success. Sarah also co-founded The Plot Twist (un)Awards, celebrating female founders and women smashing through glass ceilings with purpose, passion and joy.

Find out more about me and how I can work with you:

• On LinkedIn
• On Instagram
• On the Web
• Or drop me an email sarah@mindthegap.academy

Why your zigzags were never a problem...

Your career doesn’t look like a neat ladder.
It looks more like a patchwork map.
Different roles. Different sectors. Breaks. Detours. Chapters you didn’t plan and moments you just cracked on through.

This episode is for women who have lived a bit and are done apologising for it.

In this solo episode, I unpack something it took me far too long to own. Having a layered career, multiple specialisms, and a zigzag path is not a lack of focus. It’s range. Depth. Leadership in the making.

I share my own breadcrumb trail, from PR and marketing to leadership, coaching and culture work. From redundancy while pregnant to entrepreneurship before I felt ready. From chasing titles to realising the work I was meant to do had been quietly following me all along.

This is a real career story. Lived, not polished.

What we get into

• Why careers make sense backwards, not forwards, and why curiosity beats self criticism.
• How the parts you thought were messy were building cognitive flexibility, adaptability and leadership capacity.
• Why even the most “linear” CVs hide zigzags, mat leave, caring responsibilities, burnout, restructures, grief and quiet identity shifts.
• Why your path does not need to be tidy to be valuable. It needs to be yours. And you need to own it.

The behavioural science underneath it...
I weave in why lived experience matters. Cognitive flexibility and career adaptability explain why women who have navigated complexity become exceptional leaders of humans, not just processes.

This is the science that gives language to what you already know.

• The weekly pause
• Take five minutes. Proper five minutes.
• Where in your path have you mistaken range, breaks or detours for a lack of direction?
• What changes when you see those chapters as evidence of depth, resilience and brilliance?

This episode sits with women who are questioning their path and quietly reassessing what comes next. It reframes years of self doubt and hands you back ownership of your story.

Pass it on to a woman who keeps apologising for her CV when she simply needs to own her brilliance.

And if you’re in your plot twist era and want to be in a room where lived experience counts, where you don’t have to translate yourself and where backing yourself becomes the work, you’ll find your people through FoundHer Fire.

This is It’s Got Pockets.
Stories for women with experience who are not done yet.

Now crack on.

Sponsor
This episode is brought to you by Birkdale Insurance Group, a people-first business that cares about who gets a seat at the table and making sure everyone is included.

Sarah is the founder of FoundHer Fire—a membership space for experienced women in business who know real success isn’t just about strategy, it’s about self; a place, a space, a community where women find their fire, for women who aren't done yet and who are ready to write their own rules of success. Sarah also co-founded The Plot Twist (un)Awards, celebrating female founders and women smashing through glass ceilings with purpose, passion and joy.

Find out more about me and how I can work with you:

• On LinkedIn
• On Instagram
• On the Web
• Or drop me an email sarah@mindthegap.academy

If you’ve ever sat on the edge of your bed thinking, is this it, or felt that weird itch under your skin that whispers you’re ready for something else, something more, then this episode will feel like someone finally turned the big light on.

Today I’m joined by the brilliant Jillian Reilly, author of Ten Permissions, social change expert, former good girl, lifelong explorer, and the woman who has basically written the handbook on what it takes for us, especially women with experience, to shift from waiting for approval to giving ourselves the green light.

Why we wait.
Why we shrink.
Why we chase gold stars.
Why we tie ourselves in knots trying to look good rather than feel good.

And more importantly, how we unpick all of it.

Jillian talks about the stories we’re imprinted with, the ones we never wrote, the rules we never agreed to, and the unconscious bias baked into every choice we think we’re making freely.

She explains why purpose is not a single North Star, why winging it might be the most grown woman thing you can do, and why micro-permissions may be the secret ingredient we’ve all missed.

We talk about the girls who get all the A’s and still walk into the world feeling unprepared. We talk about why “finding yourself” is about changing your environment, doing the tiny experiments, and noticing what sparks.

This episode is a permission slip disguised as a conversation.
A pocket of truth for every woman in her plot twist era.
A reminder that you and only you get to decide how you live, lead, love, explore, step forward, slow down, stretch, or start again.

And then, the Six-Word Memoir. The moment I always wait for.
Jillian lands it beautifully:

"She gave herself permission to explore."

Imagine if you did the same today. Imagine what would open. Imagine how you would feel.

In this episode you'll hear:
• The baked-in stories that keep women playing safe
• From seeking permission to self-permission
• The danger of chasing approval instead of authority
• Why purpose evolves with every chapter of your life
• How small acts of exploration rewire confidence
• Why feeling good should guide your goals
• The rituals women need to interrupt the old narratives
• Why we must move from consuming to creating
• How curiosity and courage unlock the next version of you

If you’re a woman with experience, running a business or leading a team while holding up everyone else’s sky, and you’re ready to back yourself, find your fire and crack on with your next chapter, come into the world of FoundHer Fire. The details are always in the show notes. The kettle is always on.

And you can buy Jillian's book from all major booksellers - it's called Ten Permissions.

Tuck this one in your pocket.
You’re not done yet.

Huge thank you to Birkdale Insurance Group for sponsoring this episode. Birkdale is a people first business with a powerhouse of talented

Sarah is the founder of FoundHer Fire—a membership space for experienced women in business who know real success isn’t just about strategy, it’s about self; a place, a space, a community where women find their fire, for women who aren't done yet and who are ready to write their own rules of success. Sarah also co-founded The Plot Twist (un)Awards, celebrating female founders and women smashing through glass ceilings with purpose, passion and joy.

Find out more about me and how I can work with you:

• On LinkedIn
• On Instagram
• On the Web
• Or drop me an email sarah@mindthegap.academy