How to Talk to People You Disagree With (feat. Dr. Caroline Fleck)
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How to Talk to People You Disagree With (feat. Dr. Caroline Fleck)
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About this listen
Psychologist Caroline Fleck joins Allison and Scott to reveal the one tool that helps us connect with those with whom we may disagree. Caroline, a Stanford psychologist and author of the book "Validation", breaks down why we confuse validation with agreement, how fear shapes our political reactions, and why finding even a “kernel of truth” in someone’s perspective can transform conflict into conversation.
Plus, she opens up about the personal story that reshaped her understanding of empathy and helps Allison run the most chaotic improv game we’ve played yet: That’s So Valid—featuring Nana, prune juice revenge, and an alarming amount of "air-sex energy."
01:53 — Meet Caroline Fleck
03:34 — Why Caroline wrote "Validation"
05:08 — The Portlandia bit that reveals everything
08:45 — Comedy, connection, and co-conspiracy
11:14 — What Caroline finds not funny
13:44 — What is validation?
16:45 — The "kernel of truth" rule
19:26 — The skillset behind emotional survival
25:38 — Validation in extreme situations
33:01 — Why we think in black-and-white
48:21 — The “that’s so valid” game