In this rowdy, reflective, and unexpectedly spiritual episode, 3/4ths of ic double (IC, CJ, & Hayden) pull up to How We Heal for a conversation that spans music, memory, and meaning. We cover the usual HWH terrain: healing, growth, and the cost of vulnerability; but also veer into their musical origins, their love for film and basketball.

IC shares a surreal story of learning chess from a one-eyed bachelor who lived next door to a chess-playing pimp, and somehow it all makes sense. We discuss the criminality of Spotify, why fans have to show up in real life, and how buying merch can literally keep artists afloat. We even touch on theology, asking the age-old question: Was Jesus the sexiest of the prophets?

We discuss:

- The bands early beginning

- Life outside the music: film, basketball, thrifting, and what fuels their art

- IC's wild chess origin story

- Reflections on healing, growth, and recovery

- Critique on Spotify: how the platform underpays artists and funds war

- Why showing up to live shows matters

- Tangible merch vs. streaming

- The power of community in the underground Portland music scene

Support the show:

- Subscribe so you don't miss a moment of Season Two

- Follow "How We Heal" on Instagram: @HowWeHealPDX ​

The conversations shared here and with peers are meant for support and connection, not professional therapy. If you need professional help, licensed therapists and counselors can provide guidance and care. I'm not affiliated with these originations but personally found my current therapist through Psychology Today's Therapist Finder.

- Psychology Today Therapist Finder

- SAMSHA Treatment Locator

- Open Path Collective

Crisis Hotlines:

- 988 (US Suicide & Crisis Line)

- Crisis Text Line (Text HOME to 741741)

- LGBT National Hotline (1-888-843-4564)

In this episode, we step inside The Tac0 Truck—Hyperbeam's creative sanctuary—where emotion leads and sound follows. Kael (Hyperbeam) shows us how asking artists to name the feeling behind a track, rather than who it sounds like, unlocks deeper, more authentic work. We talk process, presence, and the kind of healing that only happens when you create from the inside out.

We discuss:

- The meaning behind his many names

- The difference between mixing audio and mixing music

- His experience living with Bipolar 2 disorder

- Finding a new sonic home in folk punk

- How his emotion-first method parallels the world of sync licensing

- The creative partnership with his wife

- His view of his body as a canvas, and his intention to cover it in tattoos as living art

- How he finds joy in cooking and baking, often exploring dishes from cultures around the world

Support the show:

- Subscribe so you don't miss an episode

- Follow us on Instagram: @HealWeHealPDX

The conversations shared here and with peers are meant for support and connection, not professional therapy. If you need professional help, licensed therapists and counselors can provide guidance and care. I'm not affiliated with these originations but personally found my current therapist through Psychology Today's Therapist Finder.

- Psychology Today Therapist Finder

- SAMSHA Treatment Locator

- Open Path Collective

Crisis Hotlines:

- 988 (US Suicide & Crisis Line)

- Crisis Text Line (Text HOME to 741741)

- LGBT National Hotline (1-888-843-4564)

What if your strength comes from the very thing, you were told was your weakness?

In this episode, photographer, musician, and educator, Tone Deff, joins me for a gentle and introspective conversation about emotional suppression, self-worth, and stepping into your truth---one choice at a time.

We discuss:

- Growing up isolated in a deeply religious household, and how photography became a way to see and be seen

- Struggling with vulnerability after being taught that pain should be hidden---not healed

- Why avoiding discomfort isn't sustainable, and how growth starts with choosing your own peace

- The quiet tension of envy and freedom---how he and his siblings look at each other's lives with admiration, but also with longing

- How reading and reflecting on ancient philosophy helps him navigate modern struggles

- His journey to unlearn the lie that "my pain doesn't matter because someone else has it worse"

Support the show:

- Subscribe for new episodes

- Follow "How We Heal" on Instagram: @HowWeHealPDX ​