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Grounded with Chuck Quinley

Grounded with Chuck Quinley

By: Learn to be steady even if the world around you is not
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 Grounded is a podcast by Chuck Quinley covering the power of our personal narrative, mindset, relational network, and meaningful work, all from a Christian perspective.

www.quinley.comChuck & Sherry Quinley Christianity Philosophy Social Sciences Spirituality
Episodes
  • Jesus Quest #3: Fixing Your Damaged Relationships by Apologizing

    Jesus Quest #3: Fixing Your Damaged Relationships by Apologizing
    Sep 8 2025
    Humans Need Community Humans require community in order to survive. We are not like sharks or some other solitary animal which can do just fine on their own. From the dawn of time, we survive because we build communities that develop into civilization. With that arrangement, there will be security from predators, more than enough food, and extra hands to help everyone survive. The greatest threat to human survival is not a T-Rex, it turns out. We have survived every apex predator that has walked the Earth in our time on the planet. The greatest threat to humans is simply the breakdown in their feelings for one another. Friends become enemies, and the love we felt before can become channeled into a murderous rage. Fixing damaged relationships matters to God.Jesus said that we should not bother to continue with our religious practices of church going and Bible study, making prayers, or offering sacrifices to God, until we have fixed our damaged relationships. He said just leave the gift at the altar and go fix it, then come back and God will want to be with you. He will even leave his blessing on the works of your hands, but only if you fix things. Fixing things often requires an apology on your part.How to Destroy an ApologyThere are two ways to torpedo an apology even after you gathered up the courage to face the problem with someone you’ve hurt. “But”—you can spend 20 minutes, apologizing with absolute sincerity, then, as you wipe your tears and blow your nose this one little word can undo everything you have said. Do not end an apology with the word “but”. You're gonna be so tempted to offer some kind of justification for what you have done so it won't be quite as bad on you but resist the temptation. Just put a period at the end of that apology and say, "So I hope you can forgive me for doing that” and then look at them until they speak. Probably it will get really easy at that point and you may have saved your friendship, working relationship or even your marriage.“If” —this is not quite as bad as the last word, but it is a form of equivocation, sort of like a plea bargain with the judge, when you are trying to get the crime down to a misdemeanor. “I'm sorry if I might've done something that might have contributed…” :-) that's a really cowardly way to start things off.By adding the word “if” to the apology, we muddy the water. Did you do something wrong or not? If you did not, then don't apologize. If you did, then toughen up and give a legitimate apology, admitting what you did. Even if you don’t feel that you did the wrong (and who does?) if you have a messed up relationship there’s probably something you could legitimately apologize for just to get the conversation started. Apologize for any little thing you have contributed, and then say something like, “I value our friendship and I really don't want anything to mess that up.” Smile and wait for them to speak.The point is that as far as Jesus is concerned, it's not OK to scratch off relationship after relationship because something went wrong and you are not willing to go face that person and try to save your relationship.So, if we want to be a disciple of his, we have to live by a higher standard than that. Here’s this week’s Jesus Quest challenge.Grounded is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.And here are this week’s prayer prompts:## Jesus Quest Week 3: Fixing Damaged Relationships - Apologizing and Making Restitution### Day 1: Examining Your Heart and Taking Responsibility**Scripture Reference:** Matthew 7:3-5> "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."Reflection: Before we can effectively repair damaged relationships, Jesus calls us to honest self-examination. This week we are going to do some amazing repair work on our relational network, but it begins with taking responsibility for our own contributions to relational damage. The Holy Spirit will guide us in strengthening these relationships and mitigating any pain being felt by others.Prompts:1. How does Jesus' teaching about removing the plank from your own eye apply to your damaged relationships?2. Have you done anything that contributed to the problems in your damaged relationships?3. What patterns do you see in your relational conflicts that might indicate areas where you need to grow?4. Are you willing to take responsibility for your part in relational damage, even when the other person was also wrong?5. What fears or pride might be preventing you from taking the first step toward reconciliation?6. Who is the Holy Spirit telling you ...
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    11 mins
  • Jesus Quest #2: Forgive Everyone for Everything

    Jesus Quest #2: Forgive Everyone for Everything
    Sep 1 2025
    Hi! Hope you are having a great day today and also that last week’s focus on walking with Jesus as a true disciple has brought new growth into your life.Forgiveness WeekToday week 2 of our 7-week discipleship sprint begins! This week is about fixing our heart and cleaning out the hurts. In live we accumulate wounds. Some are suffered in our childhood. Others come through a failed romantic love. Probably the deepest and most abiding happen in our family. It could be from your extended family, or your mom and dad, your brothers, or even your children or grandchildren. There are betrayals in our career usually because money and position are involved. Then, there are those horrible hurts that occur in church. Usually we don't see these coming and they really hit us hard. Any of these that stick to us rob us of joy and interfere with the forgiveness Jesus wants to bring to us.So this week, we're gonna deal with all that stuff and get rid of it, OK? Here are your Prayer Prompts: Use one each day as your devotional time with the Lord. They are designed to unearth hidden hurts so you can follow the process of:1. Listing the person who did it2. Writing exactly what they did3. Describing how it affected you 4. Declaring them as released from all debt to youYou may think that you don’t need to do this because you did it once already, but let’s follow the program anyway and ask the Holy Spirit to do a deep healing this week in you. Long term marriage generally had lots of irritation under the skin as you repeat in your mind some well-worn criticisms of your partner. This is the week to let it all go and start living with more freedom. Prayer Prompts### Day 1: Wounds Received in Your Family**Scripture Reference:** Zechariah 13:6-7> "And they shall say to him, 'What are these wounds between your arms?' Then he will answer, 'Those with which I was wounded in the house of my friends.'"**Additional Reading:** Genesis 44-45 (Joseph's revelation of himself to his betraying brothers. You can tell he has long ago forgiven them and sees the sovereign purpose of God even in their treachery against him.)**Reflection:** Welcome to Forgiveness Week! Today we begin our journey into forgiveness by thinking about the wounds we have all suffered in our family and intimate friendship circle. Because family is supposed to be the safe place in our life, and the one place we would never expect to receive hurt, these wounds go the deepest. They also come the earliest in our life, and since we are still in formation, the impact of these wounds is generally felt for the rest of our lives.**Forgiveness Protocol:** This week we will begin a long time of soul cleansing. This will entail something of a ceremony of forgiveness. Forgiveness is the cancelling of a debt. In order to do this we must name the debtor, state exactly what they did to us, and explain how their actions affected us. That's the debt, our of our heart and now recorded officially on paper. The only remaining step is to go before the Lord and say, "I release you" to each debtor. They owe us nothing from this point on. We are free to move on in life with the matter at rest in the lap of the great Judge of the earth.Take a blank sheet of paper and make four columns for the following headings: Name, What they Did, How it Affected Me, I Forgive them. Day by day we will carefully examine the path of our lives to unearth buried hurts we have received and release these person and the wound they caused us.**Prompts:**1. Looking back at your early childhood, can you identify a hurt or rejection that still affects how you see yourself or trust others today?2. In your teen years or young adulthood, what wounds—whether from parents, siblings or extended relatives—still carry weight in your heart?3. Were you assaulted by a family member or close friend?4. Were you hurt by a system of favoritism within your family?5. Were you betrayed by anyone in your inner circle?6. Were you sexually wounded by someone you trusted?7. Were you physically or verbally abused by family members?8. Did someone in your family introduce you to dark or harmful things?Ask the Lord to help you surface wounds received in your family as a child, young person or even now. We praying for you this week to go through the deepest cleansing your heart has ever known.---### Day 2: Forgiving Wounds Received in Romantic Relationships**Scripture Reference:** 1 Peter 4:8> "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins."**Reflection:** Romantic relationships, while often sources of joy and connection, can also lead to deep emotional, psychological, and spiritual wounds due to their intimate nature. Below is a detailed exploration of specific ways a person can be wounded in romantic relationships. As you survey your relational past, think on ways you might have been wounded and are just trying to ignore it instead of facing it and forgiving it.**Prompts:**1. How does Peter's teaching ...
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    6 mins
  • Oh No! Only 18 Weeks Left in the Year!

    Oh No! Only 18 Weeks Left in the Year!
    Aug 26 2025
    OK, I just lifted my head from my work today (writing a book and putting the finishing touches on our two upcoming schools in Thailand (Photojournalism and Content Creation for missions) and realized there were only 18 week’s left in the entire year. This happens every year.I putt along being busy, always busy, then on some day about 2/3 through the year, I realize how short the time is if I want to make this one a “significant” year. (Mid life does the same thing in a much more scary way, right?)Jesus QuestJQ is the most amazing thing I’ve been involved with all year. We’ve seen “old time Christians” revived in their faith and newbies grounded on their journey with Jesus.So, I’d like to propose a challenge for you. I’m going to do a seven week Jesus Quest sprint via email blast and I really hope you’ll join and make it a priority. It may very well be the most important thing you’ll do all year.How it’s DifferentJesus Quest is not a Bible study. It’s a guided group experience in Action Discipleship. That means we actually DO, not talk about, one practice of Jesus each week. It becomes our focus all week in our devotions and it is the ONE item on our daily to do list. Hope you’re ready! When will it Start?More Good News! No waiting! Let’s start now.Click the Video Below. Check the CHAT below all week for our ongoing reports on what Jesus is teaching all of us as we do his teachings. We’re going to actually be disciples of Jesus, not just students of the Bible! Jesus Quest Week One: Master Your ThingsHere are the Prayer prompts for this week: Spend 15 minutes each day before the Lord working your way through an honest conversation with the Holy Spirit to answer these questions. Then get up from your prayer time and take action. The point is to do the teachings and practices of Jesus, not just study them. If you will dedicate yourself to applying the ways of God to your own life, you will see tremendous progress in your life in just seven weeks.---## Jesus Quest Week 1: Mastering Your Things - Let Jesus Help You Master Things### Day 1: Mastering Things We Ingest - Food, Drink, Medicines, and Stimulants**Scripture Reference:** 1 Corinthians 6:19-20> "Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies."**Reflection:** Our bodies are a gift from God, and what we choose to ingest impacts our health and well-being. Jesus invites us to trust Him for health and healing rather than relying excessively on substances or fearing unhealthiness. When we view our bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit, our consumption choices become acts of worship and stewardship.**Prompts:**1. How does viewing your body as a temple of the Holy Spirit change your perspective on what you choose to ingest?2. Are there unhealthy habits or fears controlling your choices about what you eat, drink, or consume?3. What substances—food, drink, medicines, or stimulants—might be hindering your physical health or spiritual well-being?4. Are there habits of hoarding, overeating, or over-relying on medications that may indicate a need to trust God more for your health and safety?5. Do you over-medicate? What does that say about you?6. Do you celebrate and honor your experience of eating good meals, savoring your meals and focusing on the power of a shared meal to build relationships?---### Day 2: Trust in God's Provision - Houses, Clothing, and Resources**Scripture Reference:** Matthew 6:25-26, 31-33> "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ... So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."**Reflection:** God provides all of us daily with all that we need—our homes, clothing, and resources. Today is an opportunity to release what no longer serves us, freeing our hearts and minds for the new days to come. It is also a time to celebrate the lifetime provision promised from our Father. We can live in peace, confident that our needs will always be met.**Prompts:**1. Despite all the blessings in your life, is there any poverty mindset still living in you that contradicts Jesus' teaching about God's provision?2. Is your space cluttered by too many possessions? Do you have an obsessive need to continually buy more things?3. Do you have expensive possessions that make you feel a trace of arrogance or superiority over others?4. Do you ...
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    8 mins
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