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Understanding emotional support, emotional labor, and accountability in healthy relationships.

At some point, relationships can cross a quiet line, where support turns into emotional labor, and partners start feeling responsible for each other’s emotions. In this episode, we name that line and talk about what happens when it gets crossed.

We unpack the belief that love means fixing, rescuing, or carrying someone else’s emotional weight. We talk about how expecting your partner to process your trauma, regulate your emotions, or solve your internal struggles leads to shutdowns, irritability, and defensiveness. Not because either person is “bad,” but because the roles are misaligned.

We also get clear about what your partner can be responsible for:

🔑 What is support and what is therapy?

🤝 Your partner can’t “fix” problems

💔 Feeling responsible for someone’s emotions

🚩Emotional labor and shutdowns

We share how this dynamic showed up in our own relationship, how it created distance instead of closeness, and what changed when we moved that work into therapy and took responsibility for our emotional regulation. The result wasn’t less connection, it was more safety, clarity, and mutual respect.

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