This week, Meg takes the role of Lead Detective as she & Dumb Constable Holly zoom back 114 years in the Time Machine as the building of the Titanic begins.

Introduction & Red Flags of the week (0:00-13:40)

Meg & Holly introduce themselves and rev up the Time Machine - but in the meantime they talk red flags. Meg’s been spooked by a mysterious figure in the night time while Holly has an understandable aversion to Matt Hancock.

Titanic background (13:40-17:08)

The two detectives arrive in Belfast in 1909 to find work being done on the new Titanic vessel. It’s a vessel, not a ship, dumbo. All looks well at the moment - but who or what causes everything to go wrong? Let’s find this perp!

Red flag 1: Titanic bulk heads (17:08-23:45)

Chief Inspector Meg questions the Dumb Constable on what a bulk head is and how it may have contributed to the Titanic’s downfall.

Red flag 2: Titanic lifeboats (23:45-32:09)

A perp starts to become more clear as the trusty crime fighters dig deeper into White Star. Meanwhile, were primary school children forced to tread water in their pyjamas for 2 hours? Holly questions her past.

Red flag 3: Titanic binoculars (32:09-36:57)

Should women have jobs? These old school 1912 detectives ask the tough questions. And, more importantly, what was the deal with the Titanic’s binoculars?

Red flag 4: Raging Coal Fire (36:57-41:45)

The Dumb Constable turns Australian as things start to get loose. Did you know there was a raging coal fire in the bowels of the Titanic? Could this have contributed to its untimely sinking?

Red flag 5: Titanic radio operators (41:45-49:02)

The radio operators are tapping away just trying to do their jobs over here. But a few unfortunate circumstances cause them to miss key information. The detectives uncover more and find a potential perp who tugs at their heartstrings.

Red flag 6: Clear skies & speeding (49:02-51:47)

Hey, we’re not meteorologists, we’re detectives: so don’t ask us too many questions about this one. The situation escalates as yet more unlikely circumstances place the Titanic in the danger zone.

Red flag 7: Sleepy Californians (51:47-57:41)

Another boat (shit, sorry, VESSEL) enters the chat. But the detectives soon discover this won’t change the Titanic’s fate. We also learn more about the captain and a more pressing mystery reveals itself: did someone in the studio just fart?

Constable’s conclusions (57:41-1:02:28)

The Dumb Constable weighs in with a rare moment of genius. Plus, the terrible accents return. A perp is identified that the whole team can agree on. And we remember that, at the end of the day, this whole podcast is a joke.

Lessons learned (1:02:28-1:04:58)

Our heroic detective duo travel back to present day and reflect on today’s case. Also: did James Cameron melt steel beams? Let’s NOT answer that one.

Hosted by Holly & Meg

Recorded by Atlas Audio

Filmed by Douglas Joshua

Sources

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.