Many compassionate leaders assume that feeling drained is just part of the job. That if you care deeply, especially in the middle of ongoing stress and drama at work, you’re going to take other people’s emotions home with you. Stephanie believed that too, until supporting her team started to erode her work-life balance and her confidence as a leader.

She wasn’t lacking skill or commitment. She was leading with care, but without the trauma-informed leadership tools that help you stay present without absorbing everything around you.

In this episode, I share the shift that helped her strengthen her executive presence without hardening or pulling away. You’ll learn the “Be a Bowl, Not a Sponge” exercise, a simple, practical approach I’ve used for over 20 years in leadership coaching to help people set healthy boundaries at work while remaining calm, supportive, and clear.

So if you want to lead with compassion, reduce drama at work, and support your team without carrying it all yourself, hit play and let’s get into it.

🎧 Hit PLAY and let’s get started.

You’ll learn:

• Why your mind might be tricking you into thinking your team’s stress is your own
• A simple visualization technique that helps you protect your energy in real time
• How to lead with compassion without taking responsibility for everyone else’s emotions
• Why emotional intelligence in leadership hinges on knowing what to hold and what to release

Free Resource Mentioned in this Episode
4 Steps to Healthy Boundaries (From Exhaustion to Authentic Power)

1:00 – The Empathy Trap: Why compassionate leaders take on emotions that aren’t theirs

2:00 – Mirror Neurons & Leadership Stress: Why your body reacts so strongly when others are upset

4:10 – Leadership Burnout in Real Life: A healthcare leader on the verge of quitting

6:00 – Be a Bowl, Not a Sponge: A trauma-informed tool to stay grounded during emotional conversations

10:45 – Regulated Leadership: How staying grounded protects you from burnout and helps your team feel safer

🧘‍♀️ ACTIVITY FROM THIS EPISODE:

1. Imagine a bowl you love to look at or hold.

2. Imagine it being big enough to fill your lap.

3. Imagine the other person's words & emotions going into the bowl (not into you).

4. After the conversation, imagine pouring the contents of the bowl out.

5. Remind yourself there will be others to support that person (it doesn't all have to come from you).

💡 ANOTHER EPISODE YOU'LL LOVE:
How to Give Honest Feedback - Without Starting A Fight

Have a question you'd like answered on the show? Click here to send me a message.

More Resources for You:

• Explore Dr. Annie's Executive Coaching Program
• Get The Drama-Free Feedback Toolkit so you can deliver clear feedback that drives real change.
• Download your free guide: Executive Presence Starter Kit

Connect with Dr. Annie online: LINKEDIN | WEBSITE

Love this show? Say thanks with a 5 star rating or a positive review.

©Ⓟ 2025 Annie Campanile, LLC. All rights reserved.

You’ve been told that if conflict keeps happening on your team, the solution is better communication, clearer expectations, or another “hard conversation.”

But when those things don’t work and the same conflict keeps disrupting the team, it’s usually because you’re trying to solve the wrong problem.

In this episode, I reveal the four hidden drivers behind drama at work and explain why so many capable leaders miss them, especially in high-pressure environments like healthcare, where the stakes are high.

I also share a real healthcare leadership story that shows how years of unresolved conflict were resolved in just 90 minutes—not through disciplinary action or new policies, but through a trauma-informed approach that addressed what was really driving the drama.

So if you’re tired of revisiting the same issues, getting derailed by interpersonal conflict, or wondering why professionals can’t seem to resolve their own disagreements, hit play.

0:00 – Why conflict is natural (and why drama is optional)
3:10 – The Communication Iceberg: what leaders focus on—and what they miss
6:45 – The four drivers behind every conflict
10:20 – Why assumptions quietly escalate tension on teams
15:05 – How unexpressed wants and unmet needs create resentment
18:40 – A real OR leadership story: resolving six years of conflict
27:10 – How to start addressing the real issue without making things worse

Resources mentioned

• 👉 The Drama-Free Communication Iceberg (free download)

Share this episode

If this episode helped you see conflict differently, share it with a colleague or leader who’s stuck managing the same issues over and over again.

Have a question you'd like answered on the show? Click here to send me a message.

More Resources for You:

• Explore Dr. Annie's Executive Coaching Program
• Get The Drama-Free Feedback Toolkit so you can deliver clear feedback that drives real change.
• Download your free guide: Executive Presence Starter Kit

Connect with Dr. Annie online: LINKEDIN | WEBSITE

Love this show? Say thanks with a 5 star rating or a positive review.

©Ⓟ 2025 Annie Campanile, LLC. All rights reserved.

Many women leaders want to show up authentically at work—honest, open, and confident—but it doesn’t always feel safe to do that.

You’ve been told to “be yourself,” but also to “be strong,” “be professional,” and “don’t be too emotional.” It’s confusing. How can you be both a compassionate leader and a strong leader without being misunderstood?

In this episode, I unpack what happens when authenticity backfires, why strong communicators sometimes get labeled as intimidating, and how to tell the difference between your authentic self and your defensive self.

You’ll also learn a simple somatic practice to calm your nervous system so you can lead with authentic confidence, clarity, and calm authority, even when the pressure’s on.

What You’ll Learn

• The hidden reason authenticity sometimes gets misread as aggression or coldness
• Why your nervous system—not your personality—determines how authentic you can be under stress
• How to recognize when you’re leading from your defensive self instead of your authentic self
• A simple grounding practice (the Sunshine Exercise) to shift from survival mode to calm presence
• How to rebuild trust with colleagues when your good intentions have been misunderstood

Key Quotes

⏱️ Top Moments from This Episode

[02:00] – When strong communication becomes self-protection

Why some confident, capable women leaders get labeled as intimidating—and how the fight response can disguise itself as leadership strength.

[03:00] – Defining your authentic self

Dr. Annie’s simple definition that changes everything: Your authentic self is who you are when you’re not in survival mode.

[08:00] – The body-based truth about leadership

You can’t be authentic from a defensive nervous system. Learn why regulating your body—not just your mindset—is the real key to executive presence.

[09:00] – The Sunshine Exercise

A calming practice you can use before high-stakes meetings or difficult conversations to shift from survival mode to calm, grounded authority.

Resources Mentioned

• Free Masterclass: Executive Presence for Authentic Leaders
  Learn practical tools to project calm authority without intimidation

Other Episodes You'll Love

• Ep 19: When Cutting Off Feels Safer Than Speaking Up
• Ep 21: What No One Tells You About Healthy Boundaries at Work

Have a question you'd like answered on the show? Click here to send me a message.

More Resources for You:

• Explore Dr. Annie's Executive Coaching Program
• Get The Drama-Free Feedback Toolkit so you can deliver clear feedback that drives real change.
• Download your free guide: Executive Presence Starter Kit

Connect with Dr. Annie online: LINKEDIN | WEBSITE

Love this show? Say thanks with a 5 star rating or a positive review.

©Ⓟ 2025 Annie Campanile, LLC. All rights reserved.