Episodes

  • The Hutt Gambit Ch. 4-6

    The Hutt Gambit Ch. 4-6
    Oct 15 2025
    Where to BEGIN. Han and Chewie are living in a shitty apartment and driving a giant space bus while on the run from many a bounty hunter when they end up taking a quick jaunt to Kessel to escape from a very handsy lady Wookie. A.C. Crispin does her level best to explain why you might measure the Kessel Run in parsecs...and more importantly, how Han is, of course, a natural at flying through asteroid fields. Back on Nal Hutta, he finally gets a meeting with Jabba and Jiliac, which leads to a new job and the opportunity to romance a famous (and very serious) magician. Not even magic can save him from Boba Fett, who hits him in the butt with a dart filled with the old "Ella Enchanted" juice. But you know who can? A very handsome, stylishly dressed man who needs some flying lessons in the old hunk of junk freighter he just won in a card game.
    Show More Show Less
    58 mins
  • The Hutt Gambit Ch. 1 - 3

    The Hutt Gambit Ch. 1 - 3
    Oct 8 2025
    Smash cut to our next book...and one Han Solo, recently kicked out of the Imperial Navy after five years of faithful (?) service. He's getting very drunk in a bar and getting very nostalgic about his cool Corellian pants while he tries to get rid of an annoying Wookie who won't stop following him around. It's a good thing Chewbacca did adopt this rescue human at the shelter though, because Han spends the rest of these chapters writing checks his body can't cash. And maybe, just maybe seeing his ex across a crowd of potential pilgrims...
    Show More Show Less
    1 hr
  • The Paradise Snare Ch. 13-Epilogue

    The Paradise Snare Ch. 13-Epilogue
    Sep 24 2025
    Han and Bria head to Corellia, where they have an incredibly awkward long weekend with her family ending in Han getting recognized as the swoop champion of all Corellia by Bria's ex. To be fair, he seems hella stoked she's sleeping with such a good swoop pilot. Then it's off for an even more disastrous mini break on Coruscant that ends with Han (failing at) robbing a bank, Bria realizing she needs to deal with her addiction before she can be in a relationship, and Han getting his retinas burned off. Luckily, the Imperial Naval Academy doesn't care if you heart is now a hard empty shell because your girlfriend left you...but they do care if you know about like, jizz and art and stuff. Shrike also doesn't care about the breakup or any of that culture stuff, although he would like the bounty on Han's head. Can't a man enjoy his new retinas and eat his nerf medallions in peace??

    Plus, the chat has spoken: we'll continue on to book two, The Hutt Gambit.
    Show More Show Less
    1 hr and 10 mins
  • The Paradise Snare Ch. 10 - 12

    The Paradise Snare Ch. 10 - 12
    Sep 17 2025
    The action's really pickin' up, pardners. Han and Muurgh both race to rescue their respective partners from horrible, cult-based slavery with some tastefully designed explosions. Also, they stuff a bunch of antiques into a backpack, do some fancy flying, attend a space-cat wedding, and have some tastefully off-screen sexy times. Plus, we ask: what do we read next?
    Show More Show Less
    45 mins
  • The Paradise Snare Ch. 7-9

    The Paradise Snare Ch. 7-9
    Sep 11 2025
    Emily gets her laptop back. Han Solo does some hand smoochies and gets a reluctant mud bath. Bria gets high and realizes her religion is a sham. Muuurgh plots a murder and goes for a run.
    Show More Show Less
    49 mins
  • The Paradise Snare Ch. 4-6

    The Paradise Snare Ch. 4-6
    Aug 27 2025
    This episode is coming to you late as Emily's solar panels got connected to the grid. We are proud to say that makes Delusions of Grandeur a bi-coastal and (theoretically) carbon-free production thanks to two roofs full of spook crystals!But back to the book: our intrepid hosts describe a whole lotta drugs as Han learns more about the world he's found himself on -- and how the whole 'religion' thing is a front for the drugs thing. Han also meets his 'bodyguard', Muurgh, a high priest with his own museum, and a possibly hot Corellian archeologist wearing a dumb hat while she makes spice. Plus, Han goes on his first drug run, is attacked by pirates, and is forced to touch down on some dumb college planet called Alderaan.
    Show More Show Less
    56 mins
  • The Paradise Snare Ch. 1 - 3

    The Paradise Snare Ch. 1 - 3
    Aug 20 2025
    Welcome to a new book, a new trilogy, and some classic Dickensian capers! We've got a young Han [neé Solo], some bleak living conditions, a gang of juvenile pickpockets, brutal adults, furry best friends slash 'bodyguards', and a Bel Iblis cameo. Join us as we uncover the true story of how Han Solo became the galaxy's premier grump by the ripe old age of 29...ish.
    Show More Show Less
    54 mins
  • Special Episode: A Four Hour* Bix-cast**

    Special Episode: A Four Hour* Bix-cast**
    Aug 13 2025
    Gather 'round, fellow #GilroyGirls. In response to the INJUSTICE of Andor Season 2's Emmys snubs, we bring you this special episode where we yell about all that we loved about Andor (both seasons) and what we thought was missing and what we could have done without.

    *Not actually four hours

    **Ended up being about more than just Bix

    Tyranny got you down? Find one of our favorite Andor meme-makers on Insta @ wolfwrentruther for incredible Andor memes and links to donate to the Palestine Children's Relief Fund. The galaxy is watching!
    Show More Show Less
    55 mins