How can sports parents create well-rounded kids in youth sports, which can be hyper-specialized and intense?

David Murray's book, Soccer Dad, is the story of a "soccer-ignorant, sports-ambivalent writer who saw his daughter from the kiddie leagues through the travel-sports gauntlet to a coveted Division I scholarship. And then realized his work had only begun," says his book's Amazon description.

In this interview, he discusses the challenges of helping kids find a balanced life when they're immersed in the youth sports world.

He suggests:

--Introduce larger heroes (Muhammad Ali, Billie Jean King)

--Anchor the sport in values (teamwork, sisterhood, purpose)

--Seek meaning beyond scholarships

About the guest:

David Murray's daughter, Scout, "loved soccer from toddlerhood. Her drive and skill pulled the Murray family into the world of youth sports―one as culturally obsessive as it is economically exclusive, where each new achievement presents more challenges." Learn more on Amazon.

Visit LisaECohn.com to learn more about host Lisa Cohn.

Visit our youth sports psychology blog at YouthSportsPsychology.com

True leaders in sports don't need the spotlight. They earn trust through preparation, emotional control and how they show up every day—not by being the loudest voice, said Dan Gold, a sports dad, former surgeon and businessman and the author of Game Changers.

The foundation of quiet leadership is emotional regulation. When pressure rises, strong leaders stay steady rather than escalating emotionally, he said.

Guest:

Dan Gold, author of Game Changers

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Visit our blog at YouthSportsPsychology.com

Visit host Lisa Cohn at LisaECohn.com

High performance in sports doesn't necessarily translate into mental well-being, said Hania Taduran, a former Division I beach volleyball player and founder of the nonprofit Breaking Barriers, which aims to redefine the narrative about mental health in athletics.

During her college career at the University of the Pacific, especially during COVID isolation, she and her teammates experienced mental health challenges, including anxiety, depression, eating disorders and burnout. Fear of stigma, losing scholarships, or being seen as weak prevented many athletes from seeking help, said Taduran, who is 23.

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Visit our blog at YouthSportsPsychology.com

Learn about host Lisa Cohn at LisaECohn.com

How are young athletes affected when their parents sink large amounts of money into youth sports and pile on expectations?

Former professional golfer Jay Delsing, author of "You Wouldn't Believe Me If I Told You," describes how he pursued his sports dream and says young athletes should also aim high, even if the odds of success are low.

Growing up in a large, low-income, sports-oriented family, he was encouraged to believe he could achieve anything with hard work, he said. Although baseball was his first love, golf became his passion.

"I wasn't smart enough to really be afraid. I mean, (people) would tell me all these odds," Delsing said. "'Do you know that less than 1 % of everybody that plays golf can play on the PGA tour?' people would ask. And I'm like, no, I didn't know that. And I don't really care. Somebody's got to make up that 1%. Why can't it be me?"

Learn more about Delsing at Golf with Jay Delsing.

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Young athletes who forget skills, freeze up or make avoidable mistakes and who can't meet their practice performance during competitions are struggling with performance blocks.

These blocks can be caused by excessive pressure, anxiety, worry, perfectionism or identity issues and self-judgement, said Albert Bramante, a psychology professor and author of "Rise Above the Script."

To help kids overcome these performance blocks, parents can remind them that blocks do not reflect ability. "It's not their fault that this has happened. It's not an indication that you're a subpar athlete or subpar performer; it just means you have a lot of anxiety," he said.

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Andy Whittier knows how to cope with pressure.

He transitioned from playing college football to representing the U.S. in the skeleton sport, a solo, head-first sled race down an icy track at speeds of up to 89 mph.

At first, it was terrifying, he said. But with constant practice, he started making some "good, fast clean runs" and building confidence.

Athletes can build confidence gradually through experience, discipline and stacking small wins over time. Repetition and practice are key, he said.

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Learn more about host and writer Lisa Cohn at LisaECohn.com

Visit Andy Whittier at AndyWhittier.com

P.J. Glassey, personal trainer, "biohacker" at XGym.com, and author of Cracking Your Calorie Code, has identified 16 brain types that help determine how best to motivate athletes and boost their performance.

Developed over a 5-year period, his 20-question brain type test–which combines psychology and fitness– helps people get fit with less reliance on willpower.

Once Glassey identifies an athlete's brain type, he provides motivation and fitness "hacks," he said.

To send podcast episode ideas, contact Ultimate Sports Parent

Subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts

Visit our youthsportspsychology blog

Visit host Lisa Cohn at LisaECohn.com