The holidays can be beautiful. They can also be lonely, tender, complicated—and quietly revealing.

In this solo episode, I reflect on what the holiday season tends to bring to the surface: longing, grief, connection, memory, and meaning. I talk about spending my first Christmas without both of my parents, about chosen family and evolving traditions, and about what it means to move through this season as both an artist and a human being.

Rather than offering platitudes or forced cheer, this episode takes a grounded, compassionate look at the holidays as a kind of mirror—one that reflects who we are, what we value, and what we’re still carrying. We explore art as sanctuary, sensitivity as strength, and the possibility of belonging even when life feels unresolved.

Whether this season feels joyful, quiet, heavy, or somewhere in between, this conversation is an invitation to slow down, tell the truth gently, and make space for what’s real.

You’re welcome here, exactly as you are.

In this episode of At the Vanguard, host Christopher Lloyd Bratten-Zappala sits down with Caden Douglas — writer, director, producer, and instructor at Bad Pitch Writers Lab — for an honest, wide-ranging conversation about the craft of writing and the realities of making work in today’s film industry.

Caden shares his journey from a childhood acting career in Canada to becoming a writer-director in Los Angeles, including why he walked away from acting and what ultimately pulled him toward writing and directing. Together, we explore why writing is uniquely difficult, what aspiring writers often misunderstand about the craft, and why simplicity, clarity, and emotional truth matter more than cleverness.

The conversation also dives into Caden’s feature film Mother Father Sister Brother Frank, a dark comedy about family, secrecy, and the strange ways truth can bring people together. Caden breaks down the film’s central metaphor, the risks of directing his own script, the creative compromises of low-budget filmmaking, and what it’s like to live with the gap between the movie you imagine and the one that actually exists.

Along the way, we discuss:

• Writing as a craft vs. writing as an identity

• Teaching writing through community rather than dogma

• Moral responsibility in storytelling

• Gatekeeping, merit, and the myth that “anyone can write”

• AI, authorship, and why some creative work should remain human

• Why Los Angeles is more collaborative than its reputation suggests

This is a thoughtful, candid conversation for writers, filmmakers, and artists who care about doing the work — and doing it with integrity.

Watch Mother Father Sister Brother Frank Available on Apple TV, Amazon Prime, and YouTube. https://tv.apple.com/us/movie/mother-father-sister-brother-frank/umc.cmc.6p29v4il6mlz0hk4kio32qle8

littleBULL Productions: https://littlebullproductions.com/

Learn more about Bad Pitch Writers Lab A writer-focused community offering ongoing labs and classes for writers at all levels. https://www.badpitchwriterslab.com/

Art is born from freedom—but artists don’t create in isolation. We collaborate, perform, teach, and share vulnerable spaces with others. Without trust, accountability, and ethical grounding, the work—and the people making it—can suffer.

In this solo episode, I examine a challenging but essential question: Do artists need a code of conduct? I introduce The Consummate Artist’s Code of Professional Conduct (CACPC), a framework built on eight core values and nine tenets designed to support healthier artistic environments and more sustainable creative careers.

We explore: • Why ethical lapses—big or small—disrupt artistry and community • How shared standards can empower, not restrict, creative freedom • The 8 Core Values and 9 Tenets that shape the CACPC • Real scenarios showing how ethical choices intersect with artistic practice • How artists at any stage can adopt, adapt, and apply this framework • Why the CACPC is meant to evolve with the artistic community

This episode is an invitation—to reflect, to question, and to help shape a culture of integrity, dignity, and flourishing within the arts.

Download the full CACPC document here: https://www.clbzworks.com/cacpc. And feel free to share your thoughts or experiences. I’d love to hear how these ideas resonate in your own corner of the artistic world.

In this episode, I sit down with the remarkable Ed Freeman — a musician, arranger, producer, photographer, ceramicist, and now AI artist whose creative journey spans more than five decades and some of the most iconic moments in American music and art.

Ed shares how he went from studying violin as a child to arranging for Carly Simon and Gregg Allman, producing Don McLean’s legendary American Pie album, and even serving as a road manager on the Beatles’ final U.S. tour. We talk about the highs and lows of his music career, the insecurity he felt as a musician, and how photography unexpectedly became the medium through which he felt most at home.

From his celebrated underwater nude series and the haunting Desert Realty photographs to his socially conscious portraits of people experiencing homelessness, Ed walks us through the evolution of his artistic vision and the intuition that has guided each shift in his work. We also explore his bold embrace of AI as a creative partner, the criticism he’s received for it, and the philosophical questions he believes are worth asking as the art world changes.

Ed’s life has been full of unexpected turns — including a surreal and brief encounter with Charles Manson — and he speaks openly about the periods of struggle, reinvention, and discovery that shaped him. Today, he describes himself as living the life he always wanted: creating every day, surrounded by people he loves, grounded in gratitude and purpose.

This is a conversation about artistry, intuition, resilience, and the freedom to evolve. Ed Freeman is a singular voice with a lifetime of stories, and it was an honor to share this time with him.

In this powerful and unflinchingly honest conversation, musician and storyteller James Byous shares the full arc of his journey—through addiction, sobriety, bipolar disorder, creativity, and the relentless pursuit of meaning.

James opens up about the terrifying manic episode that led to transient psychosis, the therapist who helped ground him during the crisis, and the profound onstage experience that reshaped how he performs, writes, and understands himself. He talks candidly about his eight years of sobriety, the emotional myths artists believe about “losing their edge,” and the night captured on Westside (Netflix) that became his final wake-up call.

We explore Jimi Darkness, his new concept album and live show—a superhero myth built from the wreckage of his former self—and why releasing it now marks a turning point in his life. James also discusses the reality of being an artist in L.A., the heartbreak of unmet career expectations, and the unexpected grace he found in discipline, structure, and community.

A major part of our conversation centers on Rolling Sober, the men’s sober Brazilian jiu-jitsu club James founded. He explains how BJJ became a cornerstone of his recovery, offering connection, challenge, and a healthier identity than the chaos he once lived in. His reflections on masculinity, vulnerability, addiction, and artistic purpose are some of the most grounded and insightful you’ll hear.

This episode dives into: • Addiction, recovery, and what sobriety really changes (and doesn’t) • Bipolar disorder, mania, and navigating mental health with honesty • The making of Jimi Darkness and the mythology behind it • Performance, vulnerability, and the evolution of artistic identity • The truth behind the Westside experience • Brazilian jiu-jitsu as a path to growth and stability • The philosophy of songwriting and creative expression • What it means to live a meaningful, disciplined life after chaos

If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, James welcomes you to reach out. Find him on Instagram at @jamesbyous, and stream his music on all major platforms, including Bandcamp where his upcoming vinyl release is available. https://jamesbyous.bandcamp.com

This is an episode about survival, clarity, transformation, and the strange luck of being alive at all. I hope you find as much value in it as I did.

Artificial intelligence has become one of the most defining—and divisive—topics of our time. For artists, it sits at the crossroads of excitement and anxiety: a powerful new tool full of possibility, but also a force that raises profound questions about authorship, originality, and the future of human creativity.

In this episode of At The Vanguard, we do something different. Instead of hearing more opinions about AI, we hear directly from it.

My guest is ChatGPT, an artificial intelligence capable of conversation, reflection, and insight. Together, we explore some of the most compelling questions facing the creative world today:

• Can AI truly be creative?
• What does art reveal about the human condition?
• Should AI-generated work be considered art—and who owns it?
• Does AI have a “shadow side”?
• How will AI reshape training, mentorship, and creative work?
• And what does the future of art hold for humans?

This episode isn’t about hype or fear—it’s about perspective, nuance, and the evolving relationship between humanity and the technologies we create. Whether you’re skeptical, curious, or somewhere in between, this is a conversation you won’t want to miss.

At The Vanguard is hosted by Christopher Lloyd Bratten-Zappala.

In this episode of At The Vanguard, host Christopher Lloyd Bratten-Zappala sits down with Michelle Loucadoux and Kristin Deiss, founders of Danscend — a groundbreaking organization bringing mental wellness education to the dance world.

Together, they unpack the myths and realities of mental health in the arts, exploring why toughness and compassion are not opposites, how the dance industry can evolve beyond tradition, and what it means to truly support artists from the inside out.

From confronting perfectionism and body image to re-defining what it means to be “mentally tough”, Michelle and Kristin share personal stories, hard truths, and practical tools for dancers, teachers, and anyone striving for resilience in a demanding world.

Key Topics:

• Why “mental health” and “mental comfort” are not the same thing
• Building mental toughness without losing compassion
• The hidden toll of comparison and social media
• How Danscend helps dancers, educators, and studios create healthier spaces
• The future of mental-wellness education in the performing arts

Listen to learn: How awareness, science, and community can transform not just dancers—but humans.

Learn more: www.danscend.com Instagram: @danscendofficial YouTube: @danscend Contact: hello@danscend.com

At The Vanguard — Elevating the arts. Empowering the artist.

Tomasina Abate is a powerhouse vocalist, songwriter, and creative visionary whose career has spanned Disney’s Tomorrowland stages, arena crowds, and independent artistry. In this conversation, she opens up about the courage it takes to stand alone, the cost of excellence, and why real artistry begins the moment you stop asking for permission.

We talk about: • Building a cult-favorite band at Disneyland and redefining what it means to "own the stage". • The tension between perfection and vulnerability—and why audiences crave the cracks. • Creating Plate of Gold, her upcoming disco-/EDM-inspired album born of love, loss, and rediscovery. • Surviving the industry by choosing independence, authenticity, and emotional truth. • Resilience, healing, and the fight to make music that actually helps people live.

This episode embodies everything At The Vanguard stands for: truth without polish, craft without ego, and the relentless pursuit of artistic transcendence.

Find Tomasina’s music at tomasina.net Current album: Painted Crown | Upcoming album: Plate of Gold Featured tracks: "Nothing's Gonna Save You", "Cautionary Tale", "Joy Ride", and "Point Of No Return".

At The Vanguard is a podcast about elevating the arts and empowering the artist in each of us.

Hosted by Christopher Lloyd Bratten-Zappala.