Newsflash! Life isn’t fair. Yep, we all know it! And high school sports and competition are no exception. "It's not fair!" -- the common refrain heard among parents and players and yes, even coaches! And guess what? You are probably right when you're screaming "that is NOT fair!"

But your teen athlete or performer doesn’t needs a parent who coaches them into Blaming, Complaining, Defending and Explaining. This perpetuates a victim mindset!

In this episode, we coach you through the two things you can always control: your perspective and your response. We’ll unpack why complaining feels productive (but usually backfires), how to keep connection strong when emotions run hot, and how to lead like a calm, mild manager instead of an angry, perturbed prosecutor. If you want your teen athlete to build resilience and confidence under pressure, this starts with how you handle “it's not fair!!”

The Timestamps

00:00 The Fairness Addiction

03:14 Playing Time and Parental Perspectives

05:59 The Poison of Complaining

08:45 Understanding Coaches' Decisions

11:34 Perspective and Emotional Discipline

13:30 Important Questions for Parents

16:02 The Prosecutor vs. Manager Mindset

18:59 Modeling Behavior for Teens

Takeaways

• Fairness can become an addiction that affects our mindset.
• Complaining about unfairness can lead to negative outcomes.
• Life is inherently unfair, and we must learn to accept that.
• Parents should focus on what they can control in sports.
• Understanding the coach's perspective can help mitigate feelings of unfairness.
• Modeling emotional discipline is crucial for parents.
• Questions can help parents gain perspective on their child's situation.
• It's important to avoid labeling coaches negatively without understanding their decisions.
• Parents should strive to be managers rather than prosecutors in sports situations.
• Maintaining a positive outlook can benefit both parents and athletes.

Hey there Most Valuable Parents! We are creating a world-class podcast for parents of teen athletes and performers on YouTube. We can also be found on the other usual places you get your podcasts like Apple Podcasts and Spotify.

New episodes drop every MONDAY.

We would be most grateful if you would SUBSCRIBE to our YouTube channel where our unique show for parents of teen athletes and performers resides. The name of our podcast is the same name as our YouTube channel: The STOP PARENTING & START COACHING Podcast!

We're also posting valuable content on LinkedIn. Please follow us and connect with us: LinkedIn Steve Galley

And, there’s more–there always isn't there?! If you’ve read this far you probably are totally nerdy and giddy about helping teen athletes and performers to excel. Click here to pick up our 100%

-Nate & Steve